


Highly Unstable

by cruci_fics



Category: Ghostbusters (2016)
Genre: F/F, this was done at 2am pls forgive me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-09
Updated: 2016-12-21
Packaged: 2018-08-07 17:59:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 21
Words: 53,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7724299
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cruci_fics/pseuds/cruci_fics
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Holtzmann's voice came a bit muffled from the other side of the door. "No it's not that, I just forgot a towel is all."</p><p>Erin almost laughed. "Why couldn't you just get out and get one yourself then? I don't take you for the type to care about some water on the floor--I mean I'm anti-floor water but I'm me so--"</p><p>Holtz cut her off. "That is a fantastic suggestion Ms.Gilbert, I would have 100% done that but you see, I have a piece of highly unstable machinery situated right next to the bathtub and it may or may not implode and bring down this entire establishment with a single drop of water."</p><p>"WHAT??"</p><p>or the one where Holtzmann should really stop putting nuclear weapons where they pee.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Highly Unstable

**Author's Note:**

> i wrote this whole thing and then accidentally deleted it and then re-wrote it at 2 am so it's kind of a mess but i'm such a slut for these two so enjoy!!!

Jillan Holtzmann noted the fun gurgly sound the drain made as she shut off the water in shower and reached her hand outside the makeshift shower curtain. She wiggled it around, slapping the wall a couple times, but coming up empty. She quickly pulled back the tarp to reveal the towel she thought she had placed on a hook next to the shower to be nowhere in sight.

"Ruh Roh."

* * *

 

Erin Gilbert sat at her desk, her third cup of coffee of the night sitting cold on top of a teetering stack of papers. She quickly glanced at the time on her phone.

1:20 A.M seemed to glare back at her from the little lit up screen and she sighed.

 _Looks like its gonna be another night on couch._ she thought, looking over at the threadbare sofa Kevin had insisted they put in for his afternoon "dog naps" (Correcting him was no use at this point.)

She had gotten a ride from Abby earlier, but her and Patty had long since left, and she did _not_ want to take a taxi to the other side of town at this hour. _Maybe I should get a little cot upstairs like Holtz has..._ Erin's thoughts were derailed as a voice carried down from the second floor.

"ERINNN, ARE YOU STILL HERE?"

Erin jumped, forgetting the other woman was still in the firehouse with her. She yelled back at a slightly lower volume then Holtzmann was currently using. "Yeah I'm here, everything ok?"

"UM YES EVERYTHING IS A-OK...BUT I HAVE FOUND MYSELF IN A BIT OF A PICKLE,"

Erin sighed standing from her desk and walking over to the bottom of the stairs before calling back up. "Whats the problem?"

Erin hoped Holtz hadn't set the toilet on fire again--now _that_ had been an interesting day.

"JUST GET YOU'RE CUTE LITTLE TUSH UP HERE SO I CAN TELL YOU WITHOUT BURSTING MY VOCAL PROCESSES."

Erin rolled her eyes but made her way up to Holtzmann's lab which appeared to be empty. She noticed a light on in the bathroom and figured the other girl was in there. "There's no way we're out of toilet paper, I just restocked it in there."

Holtzmann's voice came a bit muffled from the other side of the door. "No it's not that, I just forgot a towel is all."

Erin almost laughed. "Why couldn't you just get out and get one yourself then? I don't take you for the type to care about some water on the floor--I mean _I'm_ anti-floor water but I'm me so--"

Holtz cut her off. "That is a _fantastic_ suggestion Ms.Gilbert, I would have 100% done that but you see, I have a piece of _highly_ unstable machinery situated right next to the bathtub and it may or may not implode and bring down this entire establishment with a single drop of water."

" _WHAT??_ "

Erin could hear the mirth in Holtzmann's voice through the door. "If you could kindly get me a towel ma'am, I would appreciate it immensely."

Erin shook off her shock and ran to the cabinet a few feet away. Inside the cabinet was an assortment of weaponry,cleaning supplies, and bath towels. She decided not to question the stains covering the towel and instead bolted back to the door. "Ok I've got a towel now what."

"Now, Erin, you turn the doorknob and come inside--you're a physicist I would hope you know how that works."

Erin rolled her eyes again and opened the bathroom door, expecting to feel humidity from the shower, but instead it was the same temperature as when she was standing outside. "Do you shower in cold water?"

Holtzmann peaked her head around the tarp with a grin. "Usually. It gives you a good ol' slap in the face."

Erin inched forward with the towel outstretched, only just now noticing the piece of hunking metal the size of a small child sitting by the edge of the tub. When Erin got close enough Holtzmann reached her hand out and snatched the towel before retreating back behind the tarp. "What _is_ that thing?"

Erin tried to focus on the sound of Holtz's voice, and not the fact that she was naked mere feet away. "Not sure yet! Possibly a nuclear weapon that could take out a hundred ghosties at a time, possibly a new toaster for the downstairs kitchen, I'm still working out the kinks." Erin was wondering how that pile of what was seemingly trash could be either of those things when Holtz threw back the tarp, wrapped in only the towel Erin had provided.

The first thing Erin noticed was Holtzmann's hair was longer than she originally thought, reaching past her collarbones. The second thing Erin noticed was the water running off her hair in rivulets down her chest and disappearing between-

 _Don't look at her cleavage, don't look at her cleavage_ \--too late.

"You trying to catch flies with that mouth Gilbert?"

Erin quickly snapped her lips shut, trying to focus on anything but Jillian Holtzmann standing in front of her in nothing but a towel. "Oh--um n-no, I've just never seen you with you're hair down t-that's all."

Holtzmann glanced down at the damp strands hanging next to her face and the corner of her lips turned up. "Oh yeah, I wear it up because of some previous incidents with a blowtorch. Hair and fire don't mix let me tell you..." Holtz trailed off as she stepped out of the shower, shaking her head a bit, causing water to drip everywhere.

Erin suddenly remembered the exact reason she was in here. "Holtz your hair!"

Holtzmann glanced down again, confused. "Erin we literally just discussed this, first the door now the hair? Are you sure you're feeling alrigh--" Holtz stopped talking when she noticed Erin frantically gesturing towards her little contraption friend, which was now emitting a sound similar to that of a motorcycle revving.

"Now _there's_ a sound I've never heard you make!" she stated gleefully.

Erin started inching towards the door. "Holtz?"

"Yes Erin,"

"Shouldn't we like _leave_?"

"Oh yeah for sure."

"Then why are you still standing there?"

"I just wanna see what it does for a sec," Only when the metal started sparking did Erin grab Holtzmann's hand and haul her towards the door. "We need to go right _now_ that things gonna blow--"

"Erin wait, I want to know what happened to that piece of bread I put in it earlier--" Holtzmann was cut off when the contraption started sputtering and hopping off the ground like it was on hot coals.

Holtz's eyes widened and she turned back towards Erin.

"HIT THE DECK!"

When Erin didn't react right away Holtzmann pushed her out the door and onto the hard ground, shielding the other woman with her own body.

There was a loud bang and a pop and then--nothing. Complete silence.

After a couple moments Holtzmann slowly lifted her head and locked eyes with Erin.

And ok, Erin had never really believed in heaven-- especially with the whole other side being a swirling vortex of smoke and nothingness ordeal-- but looking up at Jillian, she was pretty sure she was at the pearly gates and this was the angel here to greet her and lead her soul off to a joyful afterlife.

Holtzmann was backlit by the light coming from inside the bathroom, bathing her in a hazy golden glow. Her hair hung on either side of her face, creating a yellow curtain around the two of them. Erin could feel Holtz's weight solid against her, and the warmth radiating from her body through the towel felt nicer then Erin was willing to admit.

"Are we dead?" Erin finally found her voice, though it came out low and throaty.

"Most likely."

Holtzmann broke eye contact with Erin to turn her head and look back into the bathroom, when she turned back around to face Erin, she had the most beautiful shit-eating grin on her face and her eyes had that manic glint she sometimes got when she caught something on fire.

Before Erin could ask what was happening, Holtzmann was climbing off her and bolting back into the bathroom--Erin immediately missed the warmth but got up anyways and followed behind the blonde cautiously.

"Are you sure that things still not gonna blow--" she trailed off when she saw Holtzmann, doubled over with laughter and quite literally slapping her knee. When Erin got closer to look at the smoking metal, she realized it wasn't the invention Holtz was laughing at--it was what was sitting directly in front of it.

A single piece of burnt toast.


	2. Do You Want To See My Pipe?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Holtzmann is really hot and Erin needs a defibrillator--and a lot of other stuff happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was not expecting the feedback I got on this at all??? You guys are seriously the nicest!!! Especially in saying I got Holtzy's characterization right, because let me tell you, trying to encapsulate all that is Kate Mckinnon just through words is not easy. I thought of this chapter half asleep and woke up to find this written in my phone notes 'holtzmann + her pipe + hitting things in an alley for fun + erin's turned on + also wants to hit things with a pipe' and I think that summarizes most of this chapter.

4 days.

4 days it had been since Erin Gilbert thought she was going to lose her life with a naked Jillian Holtzmann on top of her.

Looking back on it, it wouldn't have been the worst way to go.

 

Now, as she searched high and low for her, she wondered if Holtz could create some machine or device to tell her when the other woman was about to potentially wipe out everything within a 10 mile radius.

"Ok that thing would go off like, every ten seconds." Erin jumped about a foot in the air, realizing she had been speaking aloud and Abby had appeared behind her.

Erin sighed but silently agreed. "Have you seen Holtz around? I can't find her anywhere."

Abby breezed past her, calling over her shoulder. "I saw her go out to the alley a little bit ago, something about a pipe?"

Erin quickly turned towards the back door and started walking towards it in a way that could only be described as "briskly eager"

As she walked she heard a yelp and a bang come from the kitchen and skidded to a stop outside the open door. Peaking her head in, she saw the big Australian puppy that was their male secretary bouncing a steaming piece of burnt toast from one hand to the other.

Kevin threw the piece of toast down on a teetering pile of already blackened bread and gave the smoking hunk of metal on the counter a disapproving stare. "You win again, my arch nemesis."

Holding back a laugh Erin continued on her mission to find the blonde engineer.

 

The afternoon sunlight shone down harshly on the black asphalt as Erin shielded her eyes and turned the corner into the alley way--similar to the one next to their old headquarters--and heard Holtzmann before she saw her.

The tell-tale sound of metal against metal was so loud, Erin was pretty sure every bird in the city had flown south for the winter a couple months early.

"Holtz, what in the sweet hell..." she started to say over the noise, but snapped her mouth shut the second she saw the other woman.

Holtzmann was standing in the middle of the alleyway, holding a glinting cylindrical object in her right hand that she drew back like a baseball player and repeatedly swung onto a steel trashcan--that looked like it had been sent to the other side and back. Dents and scrapes covered the can and Erin wondered how long she had been obliterating the poor thing.

That's not what Erin was focused on--though it probably should have been.

No, instead she was focused on the fact that Holtzmann was wearing the exact outfit she had worn when they first met, the only difference being that the overalls that were previously pinned up, were now undone and sitting low on her hips. The green crop top ended just below her chest, revealing the stretch of smooth skin on the lower half of her torso and--oh god were those _abs_?

To top it all off, the long sleeves of her shirt were clinging to her biceps and rolled up to her elbows, making it very difficult for Erin to not look at the way her muscles flexed when she swung backwards with what must be the pipe Abby had mentioned earlier.

Erin stood there, jaw hanging open, for what felt like hours but was probably only a couple minutes, before Jillian noticed her.

"Oh hey Erin, have you seen my cool pipe? I found it in a dumpster awhile back and then Rowan-Possessed-Abby tried to kill me with it." she proudly held up the pipe with a grin, chest still heaving and wisps of her blonde hair stuck to her forehead.

It took Erin an embarrassing number of tries to find her voice, and what came out was more of a whimper then an actual sentence.

The grin fell off Holtzman's face, replaced with a cute scrunch of her eyebrows. "Huh?"

Erin tried again, this time succeeding with great difficulty. "Uh, yea um co-cool pipe."

Erin was pretty sure she was the one being possessed now, because she definitely did not throw two thumbs up of her own accord.

Holtz didn't seem to think anything of it though because her grin was back. "Thanks. I was going to try to build a proton shotgun with it, but I figured swinging it around and breaking stuff with it was way more fun." she swung her beloved pipe around a few times for emphasis.

Erin noticed the rickety table pushed up against the brick wall and tried her voice again. "What's all this stuff for?" an assortment of objects sat on the table, including a glass vase, a stuffed bear with its eyes missing, a jar of pickles, a small plastic fishbowl filled with... _nails?_ along with many other things Erin did not want to question.

"Those are my pipe things," Holtzmann was suddenly right next to her, gazing at her with those intense blue eyes."they're things I plan to hit with my pipe."

"Where did you even _find_ a pumpkin it's barely August..."

Holtz waved her off, taking a couple steps backwards before pausing with a contemplative look. "Would you like to hit something Erin?"

"Me?"

Holtz looked around. "Unless someone came out with you, I'm willing to let anyone with an open mind try out my pipe."

Erin shook her head taking a step back towards the firehouse. "I don't know, I should probably go get some work done..." she trailed off when she saw Holtzmann coming towards her with a teasing smile on her face.

"Come oonnn Gilbert, I'm offering you the chance to hit something--with a _pipe_ no less--with zero consequences. Any sane person would accept this once-in-a-lifetime offer." Erin started to argue with that last part before Holtz was grabbing her wrist and pulling her back to the table.

"Pick your poison, we've got good old Eyeless and Mindless McGee over here looking fresh faced and ready for a pipe to the crotch, or if you wanna start messier, I can pair you up with a nice Maybelline two tone blush palette I found behind a Taco Bell a couple weeks ago. Either way you'll probably get pink eye, your choice."

Holtzmann held up the dilapidated teddy bear next to her face with a dead stare, and Erin couldn't help but crack a smile.

"Ok fine I'll play, but only one hit alright?"

Holtz did a victory fist pump before turning back to Erin with an intense gaze. "I pass the torch over to you, ma-dam." she held the pipe out with the delicacy of a baby bird.

Erin rolled her eyes taking the pipe out of Holtzmann's hands and giving it a couple practice swings.

Holtz ducked out of the way and went to stand next to Erin. "Alright, I'm going to throw up Fozzie here and you give it all you got baby."

Erin nearly dropped the pipe, trying to focus on what she was about to do and not the fact that Jillian Holtzman had just called her _baby_.

She shook out her arms, glancing over at Holtz who was looking at her with an amused expression. Erin ignored her and planted her feet firm, just like she's done a million times before shooting her proton gun.

Holtz held out the bear. "Ready,"

Erin pulled the pipe back behind her head.

"Setty..."

Erin twisted her body back further, holding her arms tight.

"SPAGHETTI!"

Holtzmann had started to toss the bear up, but Erin, in all her excitement, swung _far_ too early, missing the bear by a mile and instead whacking Holtz _hard_ where her arm was outstretched.

The sound of metal against flesh made Erin's stomach clench.

"Shit, Holtz are you ok? OhmygodImsosorryIshouldhaveneverdonethisIprobablybrokeyourhumerusImcallingnineoneone--" All of this came out of Erin's mouth in one breath as she quickly dropped the pipe and turned to look at Holtzmann--who was doubled over and clutching her arm...oh my god had Erin made her cry? Holtz's body was shaking with sobs and a tight wheezing sound was coming from underneath her poof of hair--Erin's heart felt like it was ripping in two.

Erin quickly gathered her wits and tried to lift Holtzmann's head, running her thumbs on the edge of her cheeks and into her hairline, making soft shushing noises trying to comfort her.

It only took Erin a couple seconds after looking at Holtz's face to see the tears. Only they weren't tears of pain.

They were tears of laughter.

Jillian was laughing so hard she was crying.

"T-that....was the fu-funniest.....shit....I have ever witnessed...in my entire 32 y-years...on planet earth." she wheezed out.

Erin was in shock, staring blankly at the beautiful woman in front of her she had just reduced to tears of joy.

Holtzmann straightened up, bringing the still paralyzed brunette with her, and let out one last bark of laughter. "Gilbert, I'm _fine_ ," she placed her own hands over Erin's that were still rested on the sides of her face. "you act like you just stabbed me."

Erin finally shook herself out of the hazy stupor she had been in for the last two minutes and grabbed Holtzmann's hand off of her own, holding the other woman's arm out in front of her.

There was a baseball sized red welt--but that was it. No blood. No bones sticking out. Nothing.

Holtzmann was gazing at her with a gentle smile. "See? Just a wittle baby bruise."

Erin was still miffed, turning Jillian's arm back and forth before eventually letting it go with a sigh.

She had failed to notice her other hand had still been resting on Holtz's face this entire time, and dropped it down to her side awkwardly, shuffling her feet on the gravel.

Holtzmann didn't seem to mind though,  taking a step back with her tongue nestled between her teeth, hands going to rest in the pockets of her overalls. The motion drew Erin's eyes down to where Holtz's stomach was still visible, and she drew in a shaky breath.

_This woman is going to quite literally be the death of me._

She's in for a long ride.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i already have another chapter idea that should be up by thursday or friday night so look out for that!!


	3. Third Times A Charm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> blood + worried mother bear holtzmann + cuteness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this last night thinking it was the longest thing in the world??? Turns out I can only write super short stories that take me hours to get out lmao. This one was a little more on the serious side but let know what you think!! 
> 
> BLOOD TW btw

**6:31 A.M.**

Early morning sunlight cast a hazy glow through the window above the kitchen sink, the very sink Erin Gilbert had her hip propped on, a mug of steaming coffee clutched closely to her chest.

Her third cup.

Three seemed to be a pattern with her lately.

Three cups of coffee.

3:00am, tossing and turning, unable to erase the nightmares that had been plaguing her for weeks.

Three hours she had been at the firehouse.

She had tried to get some work done with no use--this early the numbers and equations liked to hop off the paper and do a little dance around the room--not to mention the lack of sleep.

The lack of sleep was starting to be an issue.

Just last week they were on a ghost bust in an old abandoned World War II munitions factory, sussing out a claim from the neighboring houses about suspicious noises and figures in the windows, when Erin thought she'd rest her eyes for a moment.

The next thing she knew, she heard someone scream "DUCK!" and was yanked by the arm and pulled down to the ground by a familiar blonde.

Turns out, Erin had so conveniently fallen asleep against the button that started the old line, sending dozens of giant hooks swinging back and forth--and right towards her face.

Add that to the list of times Holtzmann had saved her ass.

Once is an accident. Twice is coincidence. Three times a pattern...

Erin was pulled from her thoughts as she heard the tell-tale sound of bare skin sliding against the fire pole and feet shuffling towards the kitchen.

Remembering who else was here, she quickly straightened up and tried to brush through her tangled mess of hair. "Good morning Holt--"

Erin tried, oh she really tried this time, but the woman that walked through the door was a complete opposite image to what she was used to seeing everyday and the words caught in her throat.

This was the second time in the past week Erin had seen Holtzmann with her hair down, it hung in soft golden waves, framing her yawning face.

That wasn't what was distracting her though, it was her clothing--or lack thereof.

Holtz was outfitted in only a black over sized t-shirt that brushed the tops of her thighs, and Erin would later notice the iconic X-Files poster plastered on the front of it with the line "I want to believe." and a flying saucer floating in front of a landscape.

As Holtzmann reached on her tippy toes to get a bowl down from the cupboard, the back of her shirt rode up enough to tell Erin she was wearing underwear at least.

 _Don't stare at her ass, don't stare at her ass_ \--too late.

Holtz only didn't notice the other woman in the room until she turned towards the fridge to get some milk for her Boo-Berry cereal. "Oh hey Babe Ruth, you're here early."

(Ever since the pipe incident a couple days ago, she had taken to calling Erin various baseball player names, much to the confusion of Abby and Patty.)

Erin didn't realize her mug had slipped out her hands until she saw Holtz's eyes widen, and felt something hot splash on the front of her pajama shirt.

Glass shattered every which way, each yellow shard sharper and more dangerous than the other.

Holtzmann didn't seem to notice though.

She picked her way across the minefield that was now the kitchen floor, stopping in front of Erin and gently taking one of her hands. "Gilbert are you alright? I swear to god I will sedate you if it means you actually get some sleep."

Erin shook her head, coming back to reality. "No, I'm fine just...butter fingers is all!" she held up her fingers and wiggled them in a jazzy fashion for emphasis. Holtzmann still didn't look convinced.

Erin tried for a distraction.

"Look at this mess, guess we better um, clean it up..." she trailed off, crouching down and starting to carefully gather up shards of glass.

Holtzmann sighed but went to get a bag to help anyway, jumping from side to side to avoid glass like the floor was lava. The second she turned her back, she heard a yelp and a sharp inhalation of breath.

When she turned back around, what she saw made her heart drop into her stomach.

Erin was still crouched on the floor, her head was bent low and she was clutching her arm close to her chest--but all Jillian saw was the blood. It had already stained Erin's shirt, dripped on the floor, pooling and mixing with cold coffee, and was covering a particularly dangerous looking shard of glass. The main source of it though, was Erin's hand, a slice stretching from her thumb to her pinky was steadily oozing out the red plasma.

Holtz was by her side in an instant, gently trying to pull Erin's hand away from where she held it tight to her chest.

"Erin, sweetie, I just need to stop the bleeding ok?" in any other circumstance Erin would have blushed and stuttered at the term of endearment from the other woman, but all she could think about was the pain. And the blood.

Oh god there was so much blood.

Ghosts? She was fine with. She could deal with something that was trying to spray her with ectoplasmic goo and pester (as Rowan so lovingly put it) the living with their undead, hollow eyes. But blood? Loads and loads of it out in the open air instead of where it should be warm and safe in her body? _No_ thank you.

She nearly jumped out her skin when she felt a sting and pressure on her palm. When she peaked an eye open she found Holtzmann, holding a dishtowel tightly to her hand and staring intently at the wound the way she does when she's looking at a stubborn piece of machinery that won't seem to do what she wants.

Erin snapped her eyes shut again when she saw red steadily blooming across the white towel, and tried not to throw up.

She could feel her heart rate sky rocketing, and her breathing getting more shallow the more she thought about how much blood she was losing.

She _needed_ that blood. What business does it have leaving her like this?

She nearly fell over again when she felt a hand on her back start to coax her up. "Erin, this needs to be cleaned, do you think you can walk up the stairs?" Holtzmann's voice was softer then she had ever heard it be, and she tried to nod without vomiting.

Thankfully, Holtzmann took her weird head jerk as a yes and started to help her up by putting one arm around her waist, keeping the other on her hemorrhaging palm.

They made their way up the stairs to the second floor. Erin had to stop multiple times, leaning on the other woman for support. Holtz was patient though, rubbing circles on her back when she had to stop to slow down her breathing half way up the stairs.

They finally made it to the top after what felt like hours, and Holtzmann steered her to the bathroom.

Once inside, Erin was lead to the counter and wiggled on top of it, legs dangling off the edge like a little kid. She felt Holtz reach above her to open the cabinet and ducked her head to avoid getting clobbered--which induced more nausea.

"Ohhh boy."

Her voice came out a shaky groan and Holtzmann glanced at her worriedly. "Don't pass out on me, Gilbert. I don't want to have to drag your lifeless body down the stairs and all the way to the hospital."

Erin's laugh came out meek. "Don't make me laugh I'll throw up on you."

"Noted." Holtz found what she was looking for in the cabinet and dropped it down on the counter before turning back to Erin. She peeled back the cloth to look at the wound and let out a shaky breath.

"The bleeding's slowed, there is no _obvious_ signs of a major artery being hit and I don't believe you will need stitches," Erin noted she was using the short clipped tone she often used when she was uncomfortable. "though I would advise you to steer clear of insulated ceramic dishware for the time being."

Holtzmann pressed the towel back on Erin's hand and went silent. Erin slowly opened her eyes, letting them adjust to the sunlight streaming in through the window across from them and finally looked at Holtz--really looked at her.

The first thing that caught her eye was how pale she was, paler then some of the ghosts they've seen--and that was saying something. Not only that, but her brow was furrowed intently, her eyes downcast on Erin's hand, and before she knew what she was doing, Erin reached forward and ran her thumb over Holtzmann's creased forehead, smoothing it out.

Holtz's gaze immediately softened, and she gave Erin a look that read; 'you delirious little weirdo'

Erin cleared her throat and tried to focus on the oil stained shower curtain tarp over Holtzmann's shoulder and not the way the sunlight was hitting her blonde hair, making it shine golden.

After a couple more seconds of silence, Holtz spoke again. "Alright Ted Williams, you're gonna wanna shut those pretty little doe eyes again."

Erin snapped her eyes closed and felt the cloth be completely lifted off her hand. The cold air stung harshly and she instinctively pulled her arm back in towards her. Holtzmann took it again, her fingers rubbing circles on Erin's forearm, before she spoke. "This is going to hurt...like a lot," Erin heard the sink turn on. "So please don't punch me. It's too early for that."

"But not too early for mangled limmmbs--" the last part of Erin's sentence came out in a drawn out whimper as Holtzmann had taken her hand and stuck it under the cold running water.

Erin tried to think about anything but the pain. Ghosts. Soup. Hell, even Kevin burning toast. To no avail, her mind wouldn't focus on anything but the sharp stinging.

"Hey Erin, what do you get when you cross a ghost and a cat?"

"Huh?"

"Just answer the question."

"Um, I don't know what?"

"A scaredy cat."

The joke was so ridiculously cliche, it made Erin bark out a laugh and momentarily forget about her dilapidated hand. And for the next couple minutes, it continued like that--Holtz would tell her jokes that were probably taken right off a Popsicle stick and Erin would laugh, not even noticing when the water shut off or when a square of gauze was pressed down onto her palm.

It wasn't until she felt Holtzmann wrapping a bandage around her hand that she opened her eyes again.

Looking at the other woman, she began to feel dizzy again--but not from the blood loss this time.

Holtz was steadily wrapping the bandage around and around Erin's hand with the nimble fingers that built their weapons and played with literal fire, her eyes were focused intently on her work as she paused to blow a stray strand of hair that had fallen into her line of view. Erin almost forgot Holtzmann had only been wearing a t-shirt this entire time, looking down and seeing bare skin where wide legged pants usually were. 

When Holtz was finally finished she stuck the end of the bandage down with a piece of medical tape from the first aid kit and turned Erin's hand back and forth to admire her work.

What she did next would keep Erin awake more than the nightmares already did.

Holtzmann took Erin's bandaged hand up to her lips, and left a feather-light kiss on the tips of her knuckles. "All better."

Erin tried to ignore the colony of butterflies that had seemingly arrived in her stomach and coughed to try and cover up her sudden jitters.

Holtz let her hand drop and moved to sit next to Erin on the counter, scooching so her hip bumped Erin's. It was silent for a couple of seconds until--

"Why did the chicken cross the road?"

And when Abby walked in to the two of them, laying side by side on the bathroom floor a couple hours later, asking why there was blood and coffee all over the kitchen and-- _Holtzmann where are your pants??_   Erin thought, maybe she should bleed out over her crush more often.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WWKMD (what would kate mckinnon do) (she would leave comments and kudos) (at least i'd like to think so)


	4. Don't Let The Bed Bugs Bite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Holtzmann notices Erin hasn't been sleeping and decides to do something about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guyyyys, I'm literally Kate McKinnon when she met Ellen for the first time while reading your comments (youtube it if you haven't seen that gem and you'll know what i'm talking about) I'd reply to all of them but it'd just be a lot of keyboard smashes but know that I read them all!!!! I loveee feed back and am open to requests so hmu with those!!

Holtzmann had started to notice a pattern with Erin Gilbert in the past week. 

She'd arrive at the firehouse early--often before Jillian was even awake--bags under her eyes, MIT sweatshirt on, and looking like a ghost. She'd do work half-zombied, and caffeine was really the only thing that seemed to keep her going. 

It had been mere day's since she had nearly sent Holtzmann into cardiac arrest by slicing her hand open on a broken coffee mug shard. Since then, she had tried not to coddle the other woman, but still kept an eye out for her during busts--and when Erin had come up to her the next day, asking if she could change the bandage on her hand in case there was still any blood--Holtzmann didn't protest, and she'd been doing it since.

By the fifth day, there wasn't even a reason to change the gauze anymore because the cut had mostly sealed itself closed--no more blood left for Erin to be queasy about.

But at four o' clock on the dot, she still appeared in front of Holtzmann, gesturing towards the bathroom with a jerk of her head.

She liked the way Erin swung her legs whilst sitting on the bathroom counter, and the way her face scrunched up all cute when Holtz would tell another one of her cheesy jokes, so they kept it going like that.

Patty and Abby had found out about the incident, and were mostly just relieved Erin didn't have to be rushed to the hospital, but Erin did find a plastic mug on her desk one day with a sticky note attached to the top that read; _'can't have your scrawny little ass dying on us now can we. -Patty'_

Erin appreciated the gift, but the mug didn't keep anything warm so she stuck--cautiously--with the ceramic.

The most worried though, seemed to be Holtzmann. She thought she was playing it cool, acting indifferent every time Erin nearly dropped her proton pack or slipped in that goddamn slime--but she could see right through the act. She noticed the sly glances and worried blue eyes glued to her back when they were out on calls.

Erin didn't mind as much as she thought she would, it had been awhile since someone fretted over her like that and it felt...nice.   
Yeah, nice. Butterflies-exploding-in-your-stomach-heart-skipping-a-beat- _nice_. 

Erin glanced at the clock. **3:58 P.M.**

She stood up from her desk, passing by Abby on her way up the stairs who gave her a confused eyebrow furrow. Erin knew she was starting to suspect something, she just wasn't sure what yet.

Erin found Holtzmann as she usually did; lounging back in a chair with her boots up on a cluttered table, yellow glasses snug on her face and pulling something apart with a pair of pliers. 

When Holtz saw Erin she dropped what she was doing and sprung to her feet, quicker then a cat, and started rapidly speaking before Erin could even blink.

"Before we uhmmm, you know, I would like to show you something over here in my uh, room sort of...thing." she gestured haphazardly to far corner of the room where a green tarp was hung as a curtain, much like the one in the bathroom.

Erin shrugged. "Yeah...ok." 

Holtzmann gave a sharp nod and spun on her heel to lead Erin behind the curtain. 

It looked about the same as outside, scrap metal littered the ground, red lights flashed on mysterious devices and blueprints for their various weapons were tacked on the wall.

The only difference was the twin mattress laying on the floor without a frame, old dark blue sheets were flung messily across it and a wrench was sticking out from beneath a single pillow.

That's not what caught Erin's attention--it's what was lined up next to it that made her breath catch. 

A seemingly new mattress sat mere inches from the other, except this one had brand new, neatly made sheets fitted on it. They were pure white, matching the case on the fluffy pillow and pulled down at one corner, ready for whoever was going to sleep there first. 

Her.

This had to be for her.

Holtzmann had noticed. Noticed the way Erin walked into work early, half asleep, and looking like the dead.   
And the way she stayed later then usual lately, preferring to watch Holtz work instead of going back to an empty dust-gathering apartment. 

Erin was speechless, but Holtzmann wouldn't stop to take a breath.

"Well, I just uh, I thought maybe the drive back home on late nights was a little tedious, and uhmm you might appreciate a place to lie unconscious in the dark for a couple hours here at work," Holtz sucked in air between her teeth sharply. "Anddd I know sleeping, alone is, well, not the most _spectacular_ thing in the world but I can move the bed downstairs if you prefer silence instead of me reciting quantum theory in my inert state, which I am almost _certain_ I do--" Erin cut her off by flinging her arms around the smaller woman and planting a quick kiss on her cheek. 

When she pulled back, the look on Holtzmann's face was almost comical--chin pulled back, eyes wide--except for the fact that a steady blush had started to spread across her cheeks and up to the tips of her ears.

Erin couldn't exactly wrap her mind around the fact that she had been the cause of Jillian Holtzmann blushing--and she could wrap her mind around a lot of things.

Ignoring the fluttering in her stomach, she walked over to the mattress and sat down, wiggling her butt to get the feel of it.

It wasn't the memory foam she had back at her apartment, but considering that stuff hadn't done much to get Erin to sleep at night, this would do just fine.

"Can I test it out tonight?"

* * *

  
Of course, today of all day's, Erin had switched out her sweatshirt and jeans for a tight skirt-button up shirt combo. _Of course_.

After siking herself up for nearly an hour, she made her way up the stairs to where Holtzmann was bent low over something, goggles down over her eyes. 

When Erin finally cleared her throat, Holtz jumped a foot in the air, and quickly shoved whatever she was working on under a stack of papers. She leaned casually against the table, a blowtorch clutched in her giant gloved hand, trying to look inconspicuous. 

Erin was too tired to ask what it was, instead she said something she didn't think she'd ever say to Jillian Holtzmann. "Ready for bed?"

Holtz's covered up her surprise with a cough, before pulling her goggles off and throwing them down on the workbench, along with her gloves. She did a dramatic bow in front of Erin. "Lead the way, m'lady."

Erin rolled her eyes, glad they were still in the realm of teasing each other and went back behind the tarp where her little mattress still sat primped and proper next to Holtzmann's, who's looked the complete opposite. 

She awkwardly sat down on the bed, pulling her uncomfortable skirt down lower on her legs. She probably looked like a weird mannequin posing in a store window display--and Holtzmann noticed. 

"What _exactly_ are you doing Gilbert?"

"I'm,uh, getting ready for bed." 

"Do you plan to sleep like that? You look like one of those vacuum sealed bags. You know the ones on TV that suburban moms use to store winter coats? You look exactly like that." 

Erin shot her a glare. "I happen to have some of those thank you very much," she ignored Holtz's _'of course you do'_ "They optimize storage."

Holtzmann shook her head with a smirk, removing her necklace and placing it on top of a set of red steel drawers Erin hadn't noticed until now. 

"You can borrow these." Two articles of clothing flew at Erin's head, and she caught them with the quick reflexes that came with corporeal forms appearing out of thin air in front of her 24/7.

She gulped, looking down at what the other woman had thrown her. A pair of red plaid boxer shorts and the X-Files shirt Holtzmann had been sporting that one fateful day. 

A voice came from behind her. "Everything ok?" 

Erin found her own. "Yes! Fantastic, great, amazing. These will.....look great on me." 

She stood up, glancing back at Holtz who was bent over one of the drawers, rooting around for something. Erin quickly turned her back before unzipping her skirt and letting it pool around her ankles. The boxers were loose and comfortable--she could understand why Holtzmann liked them. 

She unbuttoned her blouse and pulled it down off her arms, she was about to pull the t-shirt over her head when a yelp and a crash sounded behind her. 

Erin whirled around to find Holtzmann, sprawled awkwardly against the red drawers, one arm held her somewhat upright while her legs fought to keep her from completely wiping out onto the floor. 

"Oh my god, Holtz are you ok?" 

The blonde woman's eyes were glued to the ceiling, chin pulled in tight to her chest and floop of hair partially covering her face. "Yup mmhmm, I just had a liiiittle glitch, everythings a-ok now though systems are back up and running." 

Erin didn't believe her by the way she was still acting. 

Remembering her current state, she burned red hot upon realizing that she had been standing here in only her bra and the boxer shorts for the past minute. 

Erin spun back around to face the other wall, quickly pulling the t-shirt over her head and breathing out a sigh.

Wait, had Holtzmann reacted that way because of _her_? She wasn't even wearing a cute bra today for crying out loud! Then again, the one she was wearing is a _fantastic_ push-up. 

Shaking off her thoughts, she cautiously turned back to where Holtzmann was. She had managed to gather her wits, and had changed far quicker then Erin had, now clothed in a simple black tank top and sweatpants. If it was possible for Holtzmann to look even more relaxed then she already did in her everyday clothing, this outfit did it.

Holtz walked out from behind the tarp and went to turn the overhead lights off, leaving only the soft glow of a lamp in the corner of their 'area' on. 

When she came back and moved to turn that off too, Erin stopped her. "Could you maybe, leave that on?" 

Holtzmann almost questioned her, but upon seeing Erin's exhausted face pleading up at her she nodded, leaving the lamp on and sliding into bed. 

Erin wiggled under the covers, and only now noticed the comforting scent coming from the shirt she was wearing. She couldn't quite put her finger on what the smell was--jasmine? Erin didn't think of Holtz as the type to have jasmine scented anything, but that's the closet she could come up with. 

"Goodnight, Erin."

She resisted looking over at the woman laying mere feet away. 

"Goodnight, Jillian."

And for once, the nightmares didn't come.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i thinkkk you kind of know whats coming next after this ;) (i'm taking about hurt/comfort chapter) (it's gonna be Good)


	5. Michigan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Holtzmann didn't just 'have a feeling' it was Michigan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hugggeeee shout out to wolfsbane101 for this chapter inspo!! (literally the cutest idea like???) 
> 
> This isn't the hurt/comfort chap I originally had planned but you can bet your ass that's coming up next.

Erin awoke the next morning to sunlight streaming in through the window, feeling more rested then she's felt in weeks. She heard soft breathing coming from her right and turned to look at the other woman she had almost forgotten was there.

Apparently, Holtzmann had gotten hot during the night and decided to opt out of the whole pants-wearing thing because her sweats were flung over the lamp in the far corner. She was lying spread eagle, limbs thrown out every which direction, with the sheets kicked down to her ankles in only underwear and a tank top. 

Erin felt weird staring at her while she was asleep, and was about to turn over on her other side when a voice came from beneath a mop of blonde hair. 

"Like what you see?" 

Holtzmann popped a bright blue eye open to stare directly at Erin, who had froze up like a kid getting caught stealing from the cookie jar. 

"Uh no, sorry I was just um...." Erin trailed off, watching as Holtzmann kicked the covers off the rest of the way and sat up, stretching her arms wide with a big yawn. Through her yawn, she said something to Erin that sounded like 'sid lew creep oh way?" 

"Sorry what?" Holtzmann finished yawning looking at Erin expectantly. "I didn't quite catch that." 

"Did you sleep ok?"

"Oh yeah, great! Fantastic even," she brought her hands up from beneath the covers and made a couple of finger guns."never slept better, all good in the dream hood!"

Holtz stared blankly at her for a second before scrunching her nose and standing up. "Alright weirdo," she moved to grab her sweatpants off the lamp. "you wanna go get some breakfast? I can try to get my toaster friend to cook up some waffles. If that doesn't work we can just eat them frozen which is like, a hundred times more fun."

Erin was about to protest about the dangers of uncooked waffles but Holtzmann was already pulling her up out of bed and down the stairs. 

As it turns out, the 'toaster' did not in fact make waffles, but instead spit them right back out at an incredibly high velocity, like, take-out-an-eye-and/or kidney kind of velocity.

Erin looked at Holtzmann through the waffle-shaped hole in the wall, and wasn't surprised to see she had a look of utmost delight on her face and was wiggling the smoking Eggo square back and forth in her hand. 

"Did you see that? Did you see what my son did? That was the most beautiful thing I have ever laid my own. two. corneas. on." she looked at Erin through the hole with a wide dimpled grin. "I wonder what would happen if we put a pancake in there." 

Erin eventually talked Holtzmann out of any pancake related experiments, and a couple minutes later they were sitting side by side on the kitchen counter, each with a bowl of Boo-Berry cereal held on their laps. 

They sat in comfortable silence for a couple minutes before Erin nudged Jillian's leg with her own. "Hey..I never really properly said thank you for the bed," Erin swirled a ghost shaped piece of cereal around in her milk, not meeting Holtz's eyes. "but..it means a lot. I just wanted to make sure you knew."

Erin finally risked a glance up through her bangs, gauging for the other woman's reaction.

Holtzmann was avoiding looking at Erin as well, eyes downcast at her bowl. "No problem Gilbert, couldn't have you zonking out on calls and making the rest of us do all the work." Erin forced a laugh. 

Holtz's voice softened. "It was nothing really...I-I hope it helped." 

"Yeah, yeah it did." 

Holtzmann jerked her head in a nod. "Good, that's good." she paused for a moment, letting Erin's words sink in before speaking again. "I have them too you know....the nightmares."

Now Erin was _really_ looking at her. 

"It's ok if you don't want to talk about it," she blanched, like the words hurt coming out. "But I am...here."

Erin sat down her cereal bowl next to her on the counter so she could take Holtzmann's hand. "Thank you, I'd really like that." 

Holtz first looked down at their joined hands, and then lifted her head to meet Erin's eyes. 

The prolonged eye contact for the next couple seconds was more overwhelming then being slimed by a semi-corporeal entity, in Erin's book.   
What broke them apart was the sound of the fire station door being opened and a familiar voice calling out. "Awww dang it! Kevin, if you get soy sauce on the door handle _one more time_ I'm gonna..." 

Holtz suddenly let go of Erin's hand like she had been burned, and hopped off the counter with lightening speed. Before Erin could react she was out the door and bounding up the steps, taking them two at a time. 

Erin shook off the little tinge of hurt and hopped off the counter herself, taking both of their empty cereal bowls and cleaning them off in the sink. 

A couple seconds later, Abby was walking through the door, scowling down at her hand in disgust. When she saw Erin she jumped. "Erin, why are you wearing Holtzmann's clothes?" she reached over to grab a paper towel and wipe off her hand. "And why did Holtz run out of here like," she laughed a little. "well like she'd seen a ghost."

Erin looked down at clothes, forgetting she was still wearing the t-shirt and boxers Holtz had loaned her from the night before. "Oh um, I spent the night here and forgot a change of clothes." Erin realized how that had sounded to late and Abby's eyes widened a fraction. 

"No, no, no, not like that! Nothing...happened. We just um slept," Erin tried to rest casually against the counter, but ended up just practically lying down on it. "You know just..gals being pals!" 

Abby still looked suspicious but shook it off, changing the subject before Erin hurt herself. "We're still getting reports of activity at that old munitions factory, seeing as someone," she gave Erin a pointed look. "scared off the ghost, we should go back in and do a sweep of the place." 

"Can it be later? I have to go home and pick up a few things." 

Abby nodded, turning to walk out of the room before calling back over her shoulder. "Just make sure you put some pants on first!"

* * *

 

Erin spent the next hour, dashing around her apartment and filling a bag with various necessities; clothes, toothbrush, shampoo, extra pillow, etc. When she showed back up to the firehouse, lugging everything behind her, Abby looked at her like she was crazy. "Are you...I don't know, planning a trip somewhere?" 

Erin blew a piece of hair out of her line of vision. "Yeah, upstairs." 

When she got to the second floor, she found Holtzmann dressed back in her usual clothes, except she had her jacket off, which revealed her 'one of the boys' shirt was actually a crop top, with the sleeves completely cut out. Her capris fit snugly, and although she was wearing a belt, it wasn't looped through her pants, instead it sat loosely on her hips doing nothing else but just... _being_ there.

Her hair had come loose in the night but she had since fixed it back into it's usual bun at the back of her head, tell tale swoop bobbing along to the 80's jam she had playing, and Erin's heart did it's own little dance of it's own. 

It had only been a little over an hour since she had seen the other woman, but seeing her now it felt like it had been ages.

Erin cleared her throat loudly over the music and Holtz spun around on her heel to face her, yellow goggles dangling off the side of one ear. 

Erin tried to ignore the way her stomach fluttered when Holtzmann's face lit up upon seeing her.   
She cleared her throat again. "I um, I brought some extra clothes and a couple other things," she lifted up the duffel bag. "I hope that's ok." 

Holtzmann wasn't looking at the bag though, she was staring down at Erin's shirt--her shirt. 

Erin had changed into jeans at home, but left on the X-Files shirt because it smelled like Holtz and--no, it was _comfy._  That's the word she was looking for-- _comfy_. 

"Oh um, I forgot to change my shirt too." 

Holtzmann finally stopped staring, instead walking over to Erin and taking the bag out of her hand. "You can keep it."

She went back behind the tarp to their sleeping area and Erin followed quickly behind. 

Once inside, she found Holtz had sat her bag down and thrown open the bottom drawer of the little red steel case. "I was going to use this to store my balloon animal making supplies, but you are more important than that so it's all yours."

Erin felt red spreading across her face and down her neck. Before she knew it Holtz was out the 'door' again and banging around outside. 

She started to unpack some of her clothes, folding them and placing them in color coordinated piles inside the drawer, and suddenly Holtz was brushing through the tarp again, with something held behind her back.

"I made something for you, you do not have to use it, but I hope you give it a chance." Holtzmann took out what was behind her back and set it on the floor. 

To Erin, it just looked like a little flat square box, but knowing Holtz--it was going to be something else entirely. 

"I suggest you try it out once the sun has gone down, it will only reach it's full potential in caliginosity."

Erin blinked.

Holtzmann nodded sharply and was back outside as quickly as she had come in.

A couple hours later, they had gone back to the factory and caught the ghost there had been so many complaints of. It was only Abby, Erin, and Holtzmann--Patty had texted earlier saying she had to attend a family gathering and quote _'you do not want to keep the Tolan's waiting._ ' so the three of them got the job done themselves.

Erin was the last one to hang up her suit, when she overheard something on the little TV next to Kevin's desk. (he had brought it in to watch his baking shows.)

 _"Mr. and Mrs. Gilbert have claimed to see a ghastly apparition appear at the foot of their bed every night for the past several weeks."_

Erin whipped around, rushing to find the remote and turn up the volume. 

_"You heard me right folks, a ghost."_ the newscaster looked like he was trying not to laugh. _"They weren't the only ones being targeted, it seems a random smattering of people have claimed they are seeing ghosts--being followed by some even."_   The scene changed from the newscaster sitting in his studio to a man standing on out on the street, who looked about her age, with a wild glint in his eyes. Erin knew that glint well--she had it every time she tried to convince her parents of the paranormal.

" _It chased me! It was wailing and screaming and I ran nearly five blocks before it lost interest and went off to terrorize someone else. Ghosts are real, I'm telling you they're real!"_  The man waved his arms about and the news froze the frame of him, wildly gesturing, and Erin suddenly recognized him. How could she have forgotten.

Bradley Hillson.

He was one of the kids at her school who started the 'ghost girl' nickname and made her life a living hell. 

And then she remembered something--something Holtz had said....

_"It transports them...I'm not sure where but I have a feeling it's Michigan."_

Her eyes widened. She abandoned the newscaster now literally _laughing_ , and ran up the stairs, taking them two at a time. 

She found Holtzmann standing in front of a lab table with a deli sandwich in one hand and a blow torch in the other. When she saw Erin she grinned. "Hey guess what, I found a _gnarly_ new way to make a panini--" the grin fell off her face when she saw the look Erin was giving her, and she quickly set down the sandwich and blowtorch. 

"Everything ok Gilbert?" her face went serious. "Did the tiny bow tie store go out of business? It's a wonder it's stayed open this long with the rival tiny pocket square store right across the street--" 

She was cut off by Erin charging towards her, eyes narrowed and brow furrowed. 

Holtzmann braced herself, hoping she didn't say something wrong--this was the look Erin got on her face when she was about to take out an army of ghosts.

But suddenly a body collided with her own, nearly sending her toppling into a lot of _highly_ unstable equipment. 

This wasn't like the blink-and-you'll-miss-it hug Erin had given her yesterday, this was a full body contact-face-buried-in-neck-rocking-back-and-forth kind of hug and Jillian was two seconds from short circuiting.

Erin felt Holtzmann stiffen up briefly, but before long she had wrapped her arms around Erin's waist, bringing them even closer together. Erin clung to her neck, breathing her in. There was a distinct oil smell which--she expected, but also that flowery jasmine scent she couldn't put her finger on last night. 

She felt Jillian bury her face in her hair and nearly melted right through the floor.

Erin would have gladly died right then and there. Hell, she would have gladly died, come back as a ghost, get sucked into the ghost chipper and re-deposited as slime.   
They stood there, clinging to each other for what felt like hours,  when Erin finally pulled back to look at her. 

Holtzmann looked a little dazed, but also had a questioning look on her face.

Erin said one word.

"Michigan."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm thinking of making an 8tracks playlist for this fic, like a song/two songs for each chapter??? i've already got a couple in mind but let me know if i should do it!!


	6. Hold On To Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> jillian holtzmann has a phd in cuddling probs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: tells myself i should take a night off from writing so i don't burn out. me two seconds later: *opens a word document*  
> it's just so hard to stay away!!!!
> 
> EVERYONE GET YOUR TISSUES FOR THIS CHAPTER i'm not sure what i think of it as a whole yet because it's two am and all the words are starting to fly away but i DO know that you're gonna wanna read this alone where no one can see your tears

Later that night, a few hours after she had bid farewell to Abby, Erin made the trip up the stairs to stay her second night in the firehouse, only tonight would be different then the peaceful night before--far different. 

Once on the second floor, she found Holtzmann already getting ready for bed. She was wearing an outfit similar to the one she had on the night before; tank top, and to spare Erin--shorts, instead of pants she'd end up kicking off by morning.

Though at this point, Erin had seen Holtz pants-less so many times she was beginning to just get used to it. 

Holtzmann turned when she heard the other woman enter the room and paused while undoing her hair from it's bun. 

After their hug earlier, Erin had expected things to get even more awkward between the two of them, but instead--everything just felt more...relaxed. 

Holtz gave her that wide dimpled grin and Erin gladly accepted the butterflies that erupted in her stomach. 

"Ready for the best sleep of your whole entire life?"

Erin scoffed. "With your snoring? No way."

Holtzmann continued to unravel her hair, letting it cast down her back. "Do I snore? I've video taped myself unconscious _many_ times and the most common occurrence I've found is sleep-welding." 

"Sleep weld...I don't even want to know," she ignored Holtz's grin getting even wider. "And no, you don't snore, I just wanted to find _something_ wrong with you." 

Holtzmann's eyebrows knit together in confusion. "What do you mean?" 

Erin gestured wildly to the other woman. "You know like...physically!"

Holtz's mouth started to turn up at the corners. "I still don't follow, could you elaborate on this hypothesis Dr. Gilbert?" 

Erin sighed, moving past her to yank some pajamas from out of the bottom drawer. "You know what I mean!" 

Holtzmann wasn't even trying to hide her smirk anymore. "I'm quite certain I don't." 

Erin rose, and suddenly Holtz was right in front of her, nearly nose to nose--well with their height difference it was more like Erin's nose to Holtzmann's forehead. 

Erin gulped. This close she could count every freckle on Holtzmann's nose, and feel every breath she took. She had never noticed the mole underneath her right eye, and had the strange urge to lean forward and kiss it. 

"Interesting urge." 

_Shit_ , she had spoken out loud. _Shit, shit, shit._ Erin's mouth was going to get her killed one of these day's. 

"Um, that is not-I don't want to kiss anywhere ever forever," Holtzmann watched her struggle with an amused grin. "Did I say kiss? I meant miss! I would miss that mole so much if it wasn't there." Erin could feel herself get all sweaty and her breath was coming out in ragged puffs. "It's a good thing you've got it! Let's hope it doesn't cause any problems in the future though like melanomhhpf--" Erin's rambling was cut short when Holtz placed a finger on her lips to silence her. 

Her voice was dead calm when she spoke. "Its ok Erin, just admit you want to kiss my mole." 

Erin batted Holtzmann's hand of her mouth and tried to hide the flush spreading across her face.   
"No," she spun on her heel, heading towards the bathroom with her clothes. "You'll never get it out of me!" 

She ignored Holtzmann's yell back to her. "We'll see!"

Once inside the bathroom, Erin had to splash cold water on her face a number of times to get the redness to simmer down. After brushing her teeth and changing into her pajamas--matching tank top and shorts with little beakers on them--she turned off the bathroom light and opened the door to find pitch darkness. 

She almost panicked until a voice sounded right next to her ear. "I'm sorry I didn't want to do it like this." Holtzmann's fingers threaded through hers and she breathed out a sigh of relief. 

"Is this where you finally murder me?"

Holtz's hand squeezed her own. "Possibly, we'll see where the night goes." 

She felt a tug and let Holtzmann lead her through the darkness and over towards their room, trying hard to steer clear of any stray pipes or nuclear reactors on the way. 

By the time they got inside, Erin's curiosity had peaked immensely. She almost protested when Holtz let go of her hand, but two seconds later she heard something click and then her fingers where fitted back in Erin's. 

She was about to question Holtzmann when something flickered and shimmered onto the ceiling. 

Erin's breath caught in her throat.

Stars. Millions and millions of them. And galaxies, swirling around the room, projected on one of the walls and spanning the entire ceiling. These weren't like the little green glow in the dark stars you'd stick on the ceiling as a kid--these were realistic stars you'd see if you looked up at the night sky. 

Erin tore her eyes away long enough to look at Jillian in the soft light emitting around the room. Her eyes were peeking out from beneath a curtain of hair, gauging Erin's reaction. 

"Holtz, I..." she trailed off, at a loss for words. 

"I know it's not _exactly_ accurate to our current solar system, If I had more time to make some adjustments I'm sure I could--" she was cut off by Erin grabbing one side of her head and pressing her lips to her cheek. 

She lingered there, feeling Holtzmann sigh and practically melt into her. After she removed her lips, Erin stayed where she was, instead pressing her forehead onto Holtz temple and closing her eyes. 

Erin's voice came out quiet. "It's perfect." 

When she finally pulled back, Holtzmann was looking at her the way Erin had just been gazing in awe at the galaxies moments ago.

Erin shuffled towards her bed, still messed up from the night before. She needed to put some distance between them, not trusting herself to be in close proximity with Holtz for much longer--there was no telling what she'd do. 

_Especially_ with the look she was still giving her. 

Erin cleared her throat. "I guess we should um, be getting to sleep." 

Holtzmann shook off the stupor she had been in for the past minute and nodded. 

They got into their respective beds, side by side, and both laid in the quiet for a moment before Holtz spoke.

"Sweet dreams, Erin."

"Sweet dreams, Jillian."

* * *

 

Sweet dreams are _not_ what Erin had. 

She thought maybe, just maybe, the nightmares had been gone forever, but her luck wasn't that good. 

Maybe it was the talk of Michigan earlier that day, or the fact that the nightmares got a night off, but they were coming in stronger then ever. 

Looking back on it, Erin couldn't quite put her finger how many things she dreamed about exactly. It felt like every scary thing she had ever seen rolled into one--and then some. 

The old woman was back, standing at the foot of her bed, blood oozing out of her terrible sunken black eyes and decaying mouth, and then suddenly--she was being thrown back into the battle of New York.

Only this time, she didn't have her proton pack, or the rest of the team. Ghosts were coming at her from every direction, wailing and screaming. She was surrounded and defenseless. One of the more gruesome looking entity unhinged its jaw, coming directly towards Erin's face, and then the scene changed again. 

She was back at the edge of the portal to the other side, watching as Rowan took the form of a gigantic cartoon ghost and smashed into building after building. He held something in his hand, and for a second Erin thought it was a large noodle, but as he got closer her stomach dropped.

Holtzmann lay unconscious, clutched in his fist, head lolling from side to side. 

Rowan finally stopped in front of Erin, dropping to his knees in front of her and crushing a few dozen cars under his massive weight. 

He smiled at her with a sharp jagged grin, before closing his fist completely around Holtzmann, crushing her without a second glance. 

Erin tried to scream but nothing came out. She tried to cry but no tears would come. 

She watched as Rowan threw Holtzmann's lifeless body over the edge of the portal and down into the swirling abyss. 

Finally a scream came. Except it wasn't in the dream.

Suddenly she was back in her bed in the firehouse, a strangled scream came out of her throat as she shot up in bed. She was sure this was going to turn into another nightmare until she felt two warm arms wrap around her shoulders, and a soft voice whisper in her ear. "Erin, it was just a dream, you're ok, you're safe." 

When she heard the other woman's voice, she nearly collapsed into sobs. 

Holtzmann moved Erin's pillows to prop them up against the wall, letting go of her briefly to lay back on them. She then reached forward and pulled the trembling girl onto her lap. 

Now Erin really _did_ collapse into sobs. 

Her body shook as she buried her face into the crook of Jillian's neck and let out all the tears she had been holding in these past couple of week. 

Holtzmann wrapped her arms tight around Erin, pressing her lips onto her temple and gently rocking them back and forth. 

"Shhh baby girl it was just a dream," she lifted Erin's head to press their foreheads together, the brunettes breath coming out in ragged gasps. " _Breathe_ , Erin." 

Holtz inhaled a big breath and let it out, instructing Erin to do the same. After a couple exhales, she slowly began to calm down, collapsing her head onto Holtzmann's chest with a sniffle. 

Holtz brushed Erin's bangs off her forehead, and pressed another kiss onto the crown of her head. 

After a couple minutes of Holtzmann rubbing circles on her back, Erin spoke, her words coming out strangled.

"He killed you Jillian," her voice broke. "he crushed you and then tossed you aside like a rag doll. I couldn't do anything I-I--" Erin broke off, letting a few more tears escape. 

Holtzmann's heart had long since been torn out of her chest, but this really drove in the stake. She took Erin's head in her hands, thumbs brushing tears off her cheeks, before she spoke. "I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere and you sure as hell aren't either." 

Holtz nearly started bawling right there with Erin when she saw the look on the other woman's face. 

Erin shifted in her arms, turning so she facing Jillian, straddling her hips and laying her head back down on her chest. 

Holtzmann wrapped her arms tight around her waist, aware of every square inch of her body where it made contact with Erin's. 

It was quiet for a couple seconds before Erin's voice came muffled from where it was buried in her shirt. 

"Can you keep me awake?"

"Of course." 

Holtz started talking. About everything really. From the weapons she was currently working on in the lab, to Kevin spilling apple juice all over his computer last week, to a dog she saw on the internet who could hold five frisbees in his mouth. 

They stayed in that position, talking and laughing until Erin's tears had dried and the birds started chirping outside and sun started peaking over the horizon, casting rays onto Erin's back through the window. 

She knew the nightmares would be back--she wasn't going to let her guard down again--but now, with Jillian's steady breathing underneath her, and her arms tightening around Erin's waist every so often, she thought maybe, just maybe, the waking up wouldn't be as lonely as it used to.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> did any of this feel too rushed?? i almost made holtzy less affectionate but when i thought about it she'd be the most affectionate cuddly little shit when it came to erin gilbert OK 
> 
> p.s. i'm starting on that playlist and it should be up soon i will be sure to link it!!  
> p.p.s. y'alls comments are keeping me ALIVE


	7. Rhythm Of The Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> patty and abby are taking notice of their team mates recent 'closeness' and holtz and erin are oblivious sleep deprived five year olds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've been wanting to write a scene in this chapter for the longest time and i think you'll be able to tell which it is ;)
> 
> WARNING: HOLTZ AND ERIN BEING ACTUAL KINDERGARTNERS

Patty Tolan was not stupid.

Ok, maybe she wasn't a scientist like the rest of the team, but her historical knowledge and kickass ghost busting skills had saved their scrawny little asses more times then she could count.

So when she found out that Erin and Holtzmann had become 'roomies', she wasn't surprised.

She noticed long ago the way Erin's eyes would wonder over Holtz's body when she thought no one was looking. And the way Holtzy would often let Erin eat from her lunch, even though when Abby tried to do the same one time, Holtzmann had threatened her with a particularly pointy screwdriver. 

Patty found them in the kitchen that morning, sitting side by side on the counter with identical coffee mugs clutched in their hands, both staring blankly at the wall like a couple of zombies. 

Neither of them reacted when Patty walked in, so she stood in front of Erin, snapping her fingers in front of her eyes sharply and earning a couple blinks. "Did ya'll get any sleep last night? You look like you wandered straight off of the Walking Dead set."

Holtzmann looked a little more alert then Erin and answered for her. "We were up all night discussing the meaning of life itself and the secrets of the universe." she rubbed her lips together before taking a sip from her coffee. "and we had a competition to see who could balance the most pringles on their butt." 

Erin's monotone voice came from beside her. "She won." 

Patty shook her head, looking back and forth between them. "Ok, ya'll are definitely off duty until you get some sleep. If a ghost floated up in here right now, you two wouldn't even notice would you?" 

They shook their heads. 

Patty was about to get both of them two glasses of warm milk, drag them upstairs and read them a bedtime story herself when suddenly, Holtzy's eyes widened and she slammed her mug down onto the counter. 

"Erin, I've just had groundbreaking idea," she jumped off the counter. "come with me before it leaves my noggin." 

Erin grunted, setting her own coffee down but not bothering to move an inch. 

When it was made clear she wasn't moving, Holtzmann backed up against Erin's legs, wrapped them around her waist, and grabbed her ragdoll arms, wrapping them around her neck.

She hoisted Erin's limp body off the counter and onto her back, lifting her as easily as she would a piece of nuclear equipment that needed transporting, and nodded at Patty on her way out."See you around Patty." 

Patty stood in confusion for a moment and then shook her head. "If those two don't makeout within the next week I swear to god..."

Suddenly, Holtzmann's head whipped around the kitchen door, Erin's still lolling on her shoulder. "What was that Patty?" 

Patty jumped nearly a foot in the air. "Girl honestly..." she sighed. "Nothing Holtzy, just please don't drop Erin, that tiny body can only take so much."

* * *

  
Abby wasn't blind--despite what her eye doctor said.

She'd been friends with Erin for quite some time and liked to think she knew her well enough by now. Back in high school, dating wasn't really something either of them did. It was hard enough to find anyone that wanted to sit with them at lunch, let alone get to know them. 

Erin never really had crushes per-say; more like infatuations, and usually with men.

It wasn't until senior year, when a student transferred into their class, that Abby started having suspicions.

She had long dark hair, warm chocolaty eyes and the smoothest skin you've ever seen--Erin was obsessed.

It was always Yolanda this Yolanda that blah blah blah, and for awhile Abby had chalked it down to Erin wanting to be the other girls friend. Until one day, when she found one of Erin's notebooks with 'Erin + Yolanda Forever' scrawled onto the front and encircled with a heart. 

And from then on, it was kind of an unspoken thing with Erin. _'yeah i like guys **and** girls, so what?'_

Abby had never seen her act like this though. At first, she thought Holtz was going to be another infatuation for Erin and she'd just end up getting her heart broken like all the other times before. But then the longing gazes turned into something different. It was almost like Erin was trying to drink in every single detail of Holtzmann, both inside and out. 

Sometimes, Abby feels like she's intruding on something intimate just when they were standing in a room together. 

 

She hasn't been friends with Holtz as long as Erin, but she feels like she knows her pretty darn well too.

Holtzmann has an air of confidence and swagger she puts up, but beneath it all she's even--if not more--awkward then Erin, if that was even possible. She knew Holtz didn't have the greatest childhood, it was hard to get her to open up about it, but Abby had gotten some things out of her during their late nights at the Kenneth P. Higgins Institute Of Science.

Holtz was bullied--same as her and Erin--for being different. If the obsession with quantum mechanics and theoretical particle physics wasn't enough, her early openness with her sexuality was quickly zeroed in on all throughout middle school and on into high school. Kids called her names far worse then 'ghost girl' for staring openly at some of her female classmates, and from what Abby learned, her parents weren't much better. 

She knew Holtzmann liked to flirt, hell, she did it with Abby when they first met, but she did it with just about everyone--it was almost like her version of that voice you use when making doctors appointments. She'd use it until she got comfortable enough around you to let her guard down, and drop some of that cool-girl facade.

There was many layers to Holtzmann, (lord knows Abby hasn't gotten through all of them.) but it seems Erin has gotten much further than she has. 

Just the other day, Abby heard Holtz giggle at something Erin had said. Honest to god _giggle_. Jillian Holtzmann was a bit of a goof, but she was not the _giggling_ type of goof.

And ok, Holtz tended to stare at a lot of things for longer amounts of time than the average person, but the way she stared at Erin was different. Like no matter how long she looked--she still couldn't get enough.

So when music started blaring from the second floor, and she heard Patty's retelling of the two of them in the kitchen earlier, Abby was slightly worried.

She made her way up the stairs anyways, never one to shy away from an investigation, and what she saw was the complete opposite of what she was expecting. She recognized the song playing at full volume as Rhythm Of The Night, and once again, she felt she was _Debarging_ in on the two women.

First, she looked at the rotating blob she believed to be Erin. She was seated on an office chair, spinning so rapidly Abby was worried she would fly off and shoot out the window like a deflating balloon.

Past the blur of rotating hair, Holtzmann was doing a vast variety of dance moves, whipping and jerking behind Erin in a slew of aggressive limbs. If that wasn't hazardous enough, she had a blowtorch clutched in one giant gloved hand, and a bagel in the other. The gloves looked comical paired with her pajama tank top and shorts, but her wild getup didn't stop there. What looked to be a blanket decorated with little cartoon ghosts was tied around her neck like a cape, billowing behind her as she danced to and fro, and a bowl shaped object sat face down atop her head. Her floop of curly hair stuck out the front of it, and instead of a bun at the nape of her neck there was a low ponytail. 

After a couple moments, she spotted Abby and waved her blowtorch, shouting over the music. "WE'VE BEEN AWAKE FOR 26 HOURS!" 

Abby watched in stunned silence as Holtz threw the blowtorch onto the table and turned down the music before moon-walking over to the still spinning Erin.   
She reached out, skidding the woman to a halt and and placing her hands on either side of the chair armrests. 

"Erin? You in there hot stuff?" she snapped her fingers in front of Erin's face a couple times.

It took her a couple tries, but Erin finally focused on Holtzmann and nodded.

"Judging by the rate you were spinning and the lack of vomit on the floor, I'd say your stomach is _bone_ dry." she stuck one end of the bagel in Erin's mouth. "Eat this, I toasted it for you." 

That must have been what the blowtorch was for.

Erin's eyes widened a fraction but she tore off a bite anyways, and started talking mid-chew. "What about you?" 

Holtzmann dug into the pocket of her pajama shorts, coming up with a handful of crushed pringles. "I'm covered."

Abby almost spoke up when she started to lift them to her mouth, but Erin beat her to it. "Jillian! That is _not_ food!" 

_Jillian? Since when did Holtz let anyone call her by her first name?_

Erin split her bagel in half, standing up and wobbling slightly from the dizziness, before walking up to Holtz and slapping the pringle crumbs right out of her hand. "Here, have the other half of this." 

Holtz ignored Erin holding the bagel out to her, instead looking down ,scandalized, at the salty parabolas littering the floor. "Erin," her voice was low. "Did you just do that?" 

Erin rolled her eyes setting the bagel down on the table next to her and crossing her arms. "Yes, I did." 

Holtzmann lifted her head with a look on her face that Abby would not want to be on the receiving end of. "Do you know what this means?" 

Erin started to look nervous now, letting her arms drop down to her sides. "No, what?" 

"It means....TICKLE MONSTER!" 

Erin's eyes widened and she stumbled backwards. "No, please no!" Holtz was already coming at her though, wiggling her fingers in a menacing manner. 

A grin started to form on Erin's face as she turned to run. "You'll never catch me alive!"

Holtzmann had started to jog after Erin, blanket cape flying out behind her. "YOU CAN'T OUTRUN THE TICKLE MONSTER."

Erin had started full blown sprinting at this point, disappearing behind a tarp hanging in the far corner Abby assumed to be the two women's room. 

Holtz tore in after her, and judging by the loud laughter,the tickle monster had caught up to Erin and was going in for the kill. 

Abby shook her head, turning to go back down the stairs. "If those two don't make out in the next week I swear to god..." 

The tarp curtain was suddenly thrown open to reveal Holtzmann, face flushed and grinning, with her arms wrapped around Erin from behind. Erin was still giggling uncontrollably, wiggling around in Holtz grip. "Did you say something Abby?"

Abby looked at the two of them, rethinking everything she thought she knew, and sighed. "No, I didn't say anything. Please carry on." 

Holtzmann nodded, pulling Erin back behind the tarp. Abby heard one last scream before she made it down the stairs.

"Now it's time to meet the tickle monsters second cousin twice removed, the wedgie leviathan!" 

"HOLTZMANN NO!"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chap was a lil shorter but i'm happy with the way it turned out and i hope you guys are too!! also, one of these chapters i might have to include a baby SOMEHOW becuz can u just imagine holtz with a child??? and erin being like !!!!!! hearteyes!!! my ovaries !!!!
> 
> also i finished the companion playlist to this fic check it out here http://8tracks.com/katemckutie/highly-unstable !!


	8. Be My Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> holtz probably has a phd in fort building + erin's ovaries explode

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i honestly can't believe how much this fic has blown up like?? each chapter i post i'm thinking you're all going to hate it but then you comment the sweetest stuff i'm just blushing 24/7

After Abby left and Erin had narrowly avoided the wedgie leviathan, Holtz finally pitched her genius idea from this morning to Erin.

"A No Nightmare Fort." 

Erin blinked. "And what exactly is that..?"

Holtzmann clapped her hands together hard, making Erin jump. "It will be a structure _scientifically_ proven to keep away nightmares," she jumped onto her bed, pulling the sheet and pillow off quickly. "This thing's going to get it's own infomercials, mmkay, every wacko will see this thing in all it's glory on cable television at two am and want one for themselves." 

She grabbed Erin's sheet and pillow as well, throwing them onto the ground.  "Hey! Holtz now they're going to get all dirty..."she trailed off as Holtz pushed her mattress up against Erin's, creating a full bed on the floor. 

"What are you doing?"

Holtzmann looked up at her with a furrowed brow. "I just told you. I'm making us a No Nightmare Fort."

Erin sighed. "Care to explain what exactly a 'No Nightmare Fort' is?" 

"It's top of the line is what it is," she breezed past Erin and out to her lab. "and I figured the title kind of explains everything you need to know." Erin was too tired to argue at this point, the coffee long since worn off. 

A couple seconds later Holtz was back, well, she assumed it was Holtz behind the mountain of blankets she held in her arms, obscuring her from view.

"Do you need some help?" 

A muffled voice came from beneath the blankets. "No, no, I've got it, if you'd just direct me to the bed ma'am." 

Erin hesitantly went behind her, placing her hands on her shoulders and moving her forward a couple steps. "Ok, you're there."

Holtz suddenly pitched forward, falling face down onto the mattress with the pile of blankets acting as a very large second cushion. She lay spread eagle on top of them for a moment before snapping her head up with a grin. "You know it would have been _infinitely_ more funny if you had let me fall on the floor." 

Erin barked out a laugh. "Yeah it would have been, but I'm not that mean."

"Says the woman who committed Pringle homicide not even an hour ago." 

"Will you ever forgive me for that?"

"Hmm, maybe," Holtz tapped a finger on her chin in contemplation. "You'll have to do something for me first." 

Erin narrowed her eyes. "What exactly do you have in mind?" 

Holtz hopped up off her mountain of blankets to stand in front of Erin. She then turned her head and tapped her cheek once, puckering her lips. 

"What do you...oh..-oh!" she rolled her eyes. "Really? A cheek kiss?"

Holtzmann wiggled her eyebrows and did a wide dimpled grin.

Erin sighed, moving towards the other woman, and started to lean in. She tried to lay a kiss on her cheek but started laughing. "Ok, no you can't smile, this won't work if you're smiling."

Holtz's grin got wider at that. "Oh I can't? Why not."

Erin's smile matched hers. "Because! I can't..." she wiggled her hand towards Jillian's face. "...There's too much skin in the way!"

"Oh of course, I'm terribly sorry I'll just peel off my skin for you Erin I'll do it right now--" Erin cut her off with a firm kiss to the cheek.

Holtz smirked at her. "See that wasn't so bad, your lips are soft by the way,"she turned her head. "now you have to do the other side to even it out." 

Erin's face flushed at the off handed comment about her lips and shook her head. "Nope, nuh uh, you only get one."

Holtz raised an eyebrow. "Oh really? Because I'm sure I have the number for my good friend the Noogie Sasquatch around here somewhere..."Erin's eyes widened and she quickly pecked her cheek.

Holtzmann still wasn't satisfied. "You call that a kiss? I've had proton streams give me more action then that, come on Gilbert."

Erin sighed for the millionth time that morning. "Ok fine! One more, That's it!"

Holtz nodded sharply and saluted her. "Lay it on me." she turned her head to give her more access to her cheek, but Erin had different ideas.

She took Holtz's head in both of her hands, and turned it to face her. The blonde's eyes widened slightly, as Erin leaned forward and pressed her lips softly against Holtzmann's forehead. 

She lingered there for a couple seconds before pulling back, Holt'z face still cupped in her hands. "There, happy?"

Holtzmann looked like she was struggling to breathe, chest heaving and mouth hung open almost comically. She finally cleared her throat and shook her head. "Not exactly a cheek kiss but I'll take it." 

At that very moment, Erin yawned, somehow forgetting her exhaustion in their kissing match.

Holtz seemed to suddenly remember what she had been doing, and sprung back over to the pile of blankets, picking them apart. She looked up at Erin through her brow. "You gonna help me build this bad boy or what?"

* * *

 

Approximately one hour later, they had created what Holtzmann deemed the 'No Nightmare Fort' the old fashioned way; using the blankets, a couple of chairs, and stacks of books. It wasn't the most structurally intact fort ever created, Holtz complained about how she could make it bigger and rig something up to make a Mega No Nightmare Dome, but Erin was too tired to care. 

She climbed beneath the sheet acting as a door and fell face down onto the mountain of pillows they had thrown in. She didn't ask where exactly Holtz had gotten this many blankets and pillows--she was too afraid of the answer.

Holtz stuck her head inside the fort, holding Erin's 'nightlight' so to speak. She flipped the switch and the swirling galaxies flickered onto the blanket walls, creating a room of stars.

She went back outside and closed the curtains on the windows, shutting out the late morning sunlight, before wiggling back in with Erin. 

Their two mattresses together created a bigger one, but Holtz still had to nudge Erin over in the small space. "Move, unless you want to be maximum cuddled." 

Erin didn't move.

Holtz, having no choice, laid right on top of Erin.

She heard the other woman's muffled laugh in the pillow, and felt her wiggle beneath her. 

Erin managed to roll her body so her chest was against Holtzmann's back, she then wrapped her both her legs around Holtzs' and encircled her waist with her arms. "Fine," she spoke through the tangled blonde hair atop her face. "This is comfortable." 

"You're squeezing my intestines," Holtz grunted and squirmed on top of her. "they're going to pop right out."

"Ew," Erin laughed, letting her arms relax more. She then let out a squeal as Holtzmann used that leverage to haul her body to the right, taking Erin with her.

They lay on their side, Erin still tightly wrapped around her like a koala bear. "Always knew you'd be the big spoon." Holtz said, and Erin giggled against her neck. 

They were both silent for a couple minutes before Holz felt a breath on her ear. "How are the nightmares going to stay out of here?" 

"Well you see, I've placed an anti-nightmare chipper right outside the door. Any nightmares try and get through, they'll get sucked in, neutralized, and spit back out on us as glitter." She felt Erin's arms and legs loosen up and she peaked back at the other woman. She was fast asleep, chin rested on Holtz's shoulder, and she couldn't help but reach up and plant a kiss on her nose. 

"Sweet dreams, you beautiful little weirdo."

* * *

 

The No Nightmare Fort must have worked its magic, because Erin awoke having no recollection of any dreams. Though she did vaguely remember being wrapped around Holtz before she fell asleep, now it was the other way around. Holtzmann had her face pressed onto Erin's chest, her arms tucked in and one leg thrown over her waist. 

Erin would have gladly stayed there for the rest of eternity, but her stomach growling was not to be ignored--the coffee and bite of bagel from earlier felt like they had never existed.

It took her a couple tries to untangle Holtz from her, but eventually Erin just kneed her in the side and she rolled right over, not even flinching.

She climbed out of their fort and made her way down the stairs. Evening light filtered in through the big windows but the firehouse seemed mostly empty--or so she thought. 

Once inside the kitchen, she found Patty huddled over something out of view on the table. She was cooing and making the noises Erin usually makes when she talks to a dog.

"Patty what are you..." 

Patty whirled around, still obscuring whatever she was talking to. "Hey Erin. How've you been lately you know I haven't seen you in awhile man it's been too long--" Erin had tried to move around her, trying to see, but Patty moved at the same time, blocking what was on the table. 

"Patty let me see!" she finally pushed past her and gasped.

Sat on the table was a black and red car seat, and inside it lay a baby. An honest to god _baby_   was inside a firehouse full of nuclear weapons and even worse--Kevin. 

She looked to be about five or six months old, her skin was a warm brown, as well as her eyes and the dark hair curling atop her head. She was outfitted in one of those little onesies Erin had always wanted to put a cat in, and tucked in tightly with a fuzzy pink blanket. 

"PATTY DID YOU HAVE A BABY???" was probably not the best thing to scream but Erin couldn't stop it from escaping. 

Her yell startled the previously content infant and her chocolaty doe eyes started to well up. She let out a wail louder than Erin's and started wiggling her fists. Patty glared at Erin.

"Now look what you did!" she unbuckled the baby from the car seat and cradled her in her arms, trying to shush her. "And no, she is not mine thank you very much." she spoke harshly above the crying. "She's my cousins." 

At that moment, a voice sounded behind Erin.

"What is that underdeveloped human upset about?" She turned to find Holtzmann, scratching the top of her head with a yawn.

"Somebody," she looked pointedly at Erin. "Scared her half to death."

Erin looked sheepishly at Holtz who patted her shoulder. "We all gotta scream sometimes," she pointed to the still wailing baby. "She gets it."

Patty was still trying to calm her down--to no avail. 

Holtz came closer, holding her hands out. "Let me try, I'm great with miniature adults." 

Patty looked at her hesitantly, and then to Erin who shrugged. "I don't know Holtzy, you drop _a lot_ of stuff on a daily basis--" Holtzmann was already taking the squirming baby out of her arms, and placing her up on her shoulder. 

Erin's heart stopped. She never really looked at babies the way most other people did; like they were the sweetest most precious angels on the planet. She saw them as expensive and needy and always covered in something sticky. But looking at Jillian with a baby? She was a goner.

Holtzmann bounced her up and down, making soft shushing noises and rubbing the infant's tiny back, and miraculously, her screaming died down to a few sniffles and hiccups. 

Ok, so Holtz could not only calm down Erin when she was crying, but also a baby she's never met. Interesting.

Patty breathed a sigh of relief and shook her head. "I got locked out of my apartment and didn't have anywhere else to go, so I thought here would be best." 

"Here, with all the nuclear equipment upstairs?" Patty glared at Erin again. 

Erin was suddenly distracted when Holtz lifted the baby in front of her face and started talking to her in a high voice. "You are just the cutest freshly made human I have ever seen," the baby reached out and grabbed at Holtzmann's hair, tugging her head sharply. "and you've got quite the grip too, huh? She's gonna be a _fantastic_ welder one day." she grinned up at Erin and winked. 

At this point, Erin was pretty sure her ovaries were completely gone-- _poof,_ no more. 

Patty's phone started vibrating at that second and she pulled it out of her pocket. "Hello?" she started to walk out of the kitchen. "What do you mean you can't make a new key?! That's what ya'll are supposed to do!" her voice got simultaneously fainter and louder as she got further away but began to yell at whoever was on the other line.

Erin walked closer to Holtz, giving her a sly smile. "You're good with kids huh?" 

Holtzmann shrugged. "I relate to them. We're all just a bunch of screaming goobers right?" she said the last part to the baby, who had a death grip on her finger and had started to drool. 

Erin immediately grabbed for a paper towel and wiped it off, scrunching up her face in disgust. 

Holtz was watching her with an amused grin. "What?" 

She shook her head. "Nothing," 

"No what's that look you were--" she was cut off by Patty walking back into the room, car keys in hand. 

"Yo, there's a problem with the the dumb-ass locksmith I gotta go, can ya'll handle her for an hour or so?" 

Holtzmann said. "Sure." at the same time Erin said. "No way!" 

Holtz gave her a look. "We'll be fine."

Patty nodded and pointed to a bag on the counter. "There's diapers and formula and shiz on in there, if you have any questions just google them, that's what I do." 

She started to walk out but Erin stopped her. "Wait, We don't even know her name!" 

"Maya," Patty waved on her way out with a grin. "You girls have fun!" 

Holtz used Maya's tiny fist to wave back at Patty, and then turned to Erin with a grin. 

"So should you be mommy and I'll be daddy? Or maybe you should be mother, that fits you better."

This was going to be a long hour.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> next chapter: holtz and erin realize babies are like, so needy. 
> 
> don't forget to check out the companion playlist for this fic !! http://8tracks.com/katemckutie/highly-unstable


	9. Say You'll Be My Darling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> erin and holtz are actually new parents

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok this is the most baby!fic chapter ever i can't believe it.
> 
> the user chewiedaniels commented this yesterday 'Simple suggestion; next chapter Erin and Holtz admit their feelings for each other, elope and then raise Maya as their own as daddy!holz and mumma!erin.' and i had to post it here because honestly i'm about ready to do just that

After Patty had left, Erin went into a panic. 

"Why is she ok with just leaving her here with us?? We don't know anything about infant care!" she started to flail her arms. "And what if something happens? Like...like a ghost comes to our door, what then! Do we just let the ghost take the baby?!" 

Holtzmann watched on with an amused grin. "Let it out honey."

"Oh my god, what if Patty comes back to find a glob of slime in the car seat. What if the ghost puts on the baby's onesie and makes Patty believe it's a real human baby and then she takes her home and it's actually a ghost that wants to eat her face--" she suddenly froze, arms held aloft mid-thrash.

"What did you just call me."

Holtz blinked. "Honey."

"Oh."

"Is that ok?" 

Erin coughed. "Um y-yeah that's fine."

A sharp cry startled both of them out of their staring contest. The baby in Holtz arms was flailing almost as much as Erin, face scrunched up and legs kicking rapidly. 

"Oh my god, see! What do we do, what if she's dying?! We can't know because her brain is too small to comprehend language to tell us!" 

Holtzmann tried rocking her and patting her back again, but she continued to cry. 

"Maybe she's hungry? I know I am." 

Erin went over to the diaper bag and dug around until she found the tub of what she assumed to be the formula, and a little plastic bottle that was nestled in the outside pocket. She set them on the counter and then began to look at the label for directions. 

"What's taking so long?"

Erin sighed. "I'm looking for instructions."

"Just eyeball it!"

"I am _not_ going to eyeball it!" she called over the crying.

Erin finally found the directions on the side and unscrewed the lid, pouring a couple scoops into the bottle and darting over to the sink. She quickly filled the bottle up with water and came back to where Holtzmann was still trying to calm the crying baby. 

She thrust the bottle out at her. Holtz blinked. 

"Well? Take it!" 

"You didn't heat it up."

"What does that matter?" 

"Do _you_ like cold soup?"

Erin shrugged. "I don't know, I've had a couple good chilled coconut soups in my day."

Holtzmann sighed, snatching the bottle out of her hand and walking over to the microwave. She held the baby with one arm and stuck the bottle in with the other, all the while still keeping up a steady bouncing motion. 

Erin was tired of her heart completely giving out on her these day's. 

She could ignore the way the late evening sunlight shone through the window and right onto Jillian holding an infant, still in her pajamas and hair a mess. She could ignore the way her heart flipped when Holtz would press a kiss on the baby's temple and whisper softly to her that everything's ok. But at this point, she didn't want to. She let the warm tingly feeling spread across her body, looking at what could possibly be her future. _Their_ future.

In that moment, she made a decision. 

She was going to kiss Jillian Holtzmann right on the mouth.

Not at this very moment with a screaming baby sandwiched between them--but soon. _Very_ soon.

She was startled out of an image of the two of them kissing romantically on top of the empire state building when the microwave beeped loudly. Holtz quickly grabbed the bottle and adjusted Maya so she was cradled in the crook of her arm, she started to lower the bottle before Erin stopped her. 

"Wait! You have to test it on the inside of your wrist to make sure it's not too hot."

"How do you know that?"

"I watch movies." 

Holtz shrugged, shaking out some of the formula onto her wrist. 

"Well?"

"Oh yeah, yeah, that could melt metal for sure."

"Put it in the freezer for a minute then." she opened the fridge and Holtz stuck the bottle inside. 

She then sucked on the inside of her wrist where the formula was and made a face. "Now that is some _nasty_ shit right there."

Erin quickly covered the baby's ears. "Don't curse in front of her!" 

Holtzmann looked at Erin exasperatedly. "She cannot understand me."

"But she will eventually!" Holtz made a face. 

"Don't give me that look."

"What look?"

"You know the _Erin's being ridiculous again look_." 

"Oh like you don't have a face for me too. The _Holtzmann is about to set off a really cool bomb but I'm uptight and it could wipe out the whole city so I need to be a killjoy and stop her blah blah blah_ one." 

"Ok, there's a difference between me being a little quirky and you setting a toilet on fire!"

"Oh come ooonnn it was one and a half times!" 

"That is far too many and you know it!" 

Throughout all of this, both had failed to notice Maya had stopped crying, instead blinking up at the two of them with wide curious eyes.

Holtz yanked open the freezer door, taking out the bottle and sticking it in the baby's mouth without even looking. She took it happily: _dinner and a show._

"Maybe I was tired of hearing you complaining about how Kevin leaves the seat up all the time and fixed the entire problem!"

" _Set it on fire_. I believe the words you're looking for are, _I set the toilet on fire_." 

"Why are you suddenly up and arms about this again?"

Erin sighed. "I don't know." 

"I think I do," Holtz looked down at Maya, still contentedly eating. "You're getting a kick out of this aren't you, you adorable little goblin." The goblin in question popped the bottle out of her mouth to give Holtzmann a wide toothless grin. 

"You're tearing apart this family, you know that right?" 

Erin cracked a smile. "That's must have been her plan all along."

Holtz wagged a finger at the baby. "Didn't we ever teach you? No plotting evil schemes before midnight. The moon isn't aligned right--everything will go wrong, _trust me_."

Maya seemed to be done eating, so Holtz took the bottle and set it on the counter before looking at Erin with a sly smile. "Would you like to perform the great honor of burping her?" 

Erin's eyes widened. "Um, no I'm good, I'm so good--" Holtzmann was already placing the baby up on her shoulder. 

"It's easy, just slap her on the back and don't drop her." 

Erin hesitantly held the infant and started patting her back. 

"Harder." 

"Excuse me?"

"You have to do it harder or she won't burp." 

"How do you know all this stuff?" 

Holtz shrugged. "Movies."

Erin started patting her back harder, and after a couple seconds the baby let out a belch--along with something else. 

Holtzmann's eyes widened. "Whoops, forgot to mention the whole spitting up thing." 

Erin had her eyes squeezed shut and her lips pressed together firmly. "Yep, uh huh, thanks for that." 

Holtz grabbed a wipe out of Maya's diaper bag and then took her from Erin's arms. She wiped the baby's mouth and then held the wipe out to Erin. "Here you go." 

Erin declined the gross offer. "I'm just going to go upstairs and change, thanks." 

She quickly spun on her heel and walked out the door, ignoring Holtzmann's cry of "It's because she loves you! We all throw up on the people we love sometimes!"

She quickly threw on a pair of sweatpants upstairs and grabbed the first shirt she saw, not bothering to look at what it was in fear of leaving Holtz alone with an infant for too long. She went back down to find Holtzmann sitting on the little threadbare sofa near the kitchen, she had Maya stood on her lap and was wiggling her arms around. "Check this out, I think I can get her to do the wave--" she stopped talking abruptly when she lifted her head to look at Erin.

Her eye's were glued to Erin's shirt, and she looked down to make sure she actually _did_ put one-- _Oh my god._

In her haste, she had grabbed the first thing she saw--or rather didn't look at--at all. 

It was Holtzmann's _'One Of The Boy's'_ blue and red crop top. She was wondering why it had felt so drafty all of the sudden--her entire midriff was completely exposed. " _Shit,_ I'm sorry I didn't even look at what I put, on I can go change." 

After a second, Holtzmann gulped hard, like it was hard to swallow. "N-no, it's fine you're....fine."

She could feel her face turning bright red. "Are you sure?" 

Holtz's voice cracked. "Positive. 100%. All the way completely fantastically _good_."

Erin was about to speak again when she smelled something--not something, _someone._

"What the holy hell is that?"

Holtz finally tore her eyes away from Erin to look at the gurgling baby in her lap. "Ruh roh."

* * *

 

They had cleared a space on Kevin's desk (he wouldn't mind--or even notice if half his stuff was missing) and put an old towel down, before laying Maya flat on top of it. 

Holtzmann stood over her, wearing her giant green gloves, along with the large mask she uses to weld. "I'm going in." 

Erin stood as far away as she could, holding a plastic bag open and scrunching her eyes closed. "I believe in you Holtz." 

A couple minutes later, she heard Holtzmann say. "Diaper me." Erin shuffled forward, eyes still shut, and held out the diaper. It was snatched from her hand and then she felt something heavy drop into the bag she was holding. 

She quickly tied the bag off, and opened her eyes to take it out to dumpster. Once back inside, she found Holtz holding Maya, who was now wearing only a diaper. Before she knew it, the baby was being shoved into her arms and Holtz was brushing past her to go upstairs. 

Erin protested. "Where are you going?" 

"Her outfit has been...compromised. I've gotta go throw it in the wash."

"There's a washing machine up there..." Erin trailed off as Holtz got out of earshot, and she looked down at the baby in her arms. She stared into her warm brown eyes, and at the curly hair going every which way on her head, as well as the little button nose she kept scrunching and couldn't help but melt. "Ok, you're kind of cute."

 

After Holtz had disposed of the evidence, she walked back down the stairs to find something that _definitely_ made her short circuit. 

Erin stood in the middle of the room, wearing _her_ shirt, the smooth stretch of skin on her stomach wasn't the most she had seen of Erin--that night when she was topless in Holtz's bedroom kind of took the cake on that one--but it was enough to get her heart racing. She held Maya, still clothed in only a diaper, up on her shoulder and was making goofy faces at her and rocking back and forth. The sun had started to set, and streaks of pink and orange lit the sky and cast a glow across the walls. 

She watched as Erin took the baby to look out the window and started speaking to her in hushed tones--probably explaining what made the sky do that in deep scientific detail.

She decided, in that moment, that she was going to kiss Erin Gilbert right on smackers. 

Not right now--baby spit up might not bother Holtzmann, but Erin was weird with that kind of stuff. Soon though. _Very_ soon.

Holtzmann walked up behind Erin, resting her chin on the shoulder that wasn't holding Maya and giving her a lazy grin. "See? You're the most mom I've ever seen."

Erin jumped a little when Holtz appeared behind her, and then laughed. "Me? No way. I'd screw up a kid so bad."

Holtz made a face. "Why do you say that?" 

Erin shrugged. "I don't know...I'm just not mother material." 

"Oh I don't know about that," she turned her head a fraction to look at Erin. "I think you'd make a pretty damn kickass mom."

Erin met her eyes, noticing their sudden close proximity, "Oh yeah? You wouldn't be so bad yourself." 

They were interrupted by Erin's phone buzzing loudly on her desk as few feet away. 

"That might be Patty," she handed Maya off to Holtzmann."take this." 

Erin walked over to look at her phone as Holtz threw the giggling baby up in the air. "Did you miss me, you little malignant fiend you?"

"Patty said she'll be here in fifteen minutes or so."

"Mmkay, guess we should put another outfit on ol' snot face here huh."

She went back into the kitchen and came back with another onesie, this one decorated with elephants. She held up the tiny article of clothing with a blank face. "Do you think this is my size."

Erin rolled her eyes with a smirk and snatched it out of her hand. "Set her down over here."

They laid Maya down on the couch and both simultaneously tried to get her into it. "Why. won't. she. stop. moving." Erin said through clinched teeth as she tried to get the baby's flailing arms in legs into the onesie. 

"She's like one of those things outside car dealerships, you know the big stick fellows? We just gotta get a good hold on her before she snaps away in the wind again." 

After many tries, they got her limbs inside and then did a joint effort in snapping closed the clasps going up the onesie. 

Erin sighed heavily. "Babies are...so much." 

Holtzmann nodded with a sigh of her own, picking Maya back up and bouncing her around in her arms. "So what do you want to do until Patty gets here?"

* * *

  
Fifteen minutes later, Patty walked in the fire station, bracing herself for whatever crazy shit she would find. 

"If ya'll let that baby go down the fire pole I swear to god..." she trailed off as she came to a stop in front of couch near the front doors. 

There sat Holtzmann, head leaned back and mouth open--fast asleep. Erin was the same way, except she was curled into Holtz's side, her head fitting onto the other woman's shoulder. The best part was Maya, laying on her stomach atop Holtzy's chest, completely zonked out.

Patty took out her phone and snapped a couple pictures. "This is the best blackmail material I've ever gotten my hands on," she looked down at their sleeping forms and shook her head. "And quite possibly the cutest shit I have ever seen."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> first person to get the song reference from the last two chapter titles gets a virtual Lesbian Salute™


	10. Like Real People Do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> erin's frustrated in more ways then one and kevin just loves hugs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OHHH BOY. this chapter was A TRIP to write. It's super mega longer then my usual because i stayed up till FOUR AM writing it last night, and then spent another two hours editing and adding a whole bunch of stuff this afternoon. 
> 
> WARNING: have a cold shower on hand for this chap.....don't ask why just do it and be prepared

_This is it._ Erin thought. _I'm finally going to do it._

She had been siking herself up to kiss Jillian Holtzmann ever since she had made the decision to a few days ago. Since then, it seemed like every ounce of her bravery she'd ever had, vanished. Instead replaced with sweaty palms and stuttered out sentences and _very_ awkward sleeping arrangements.

Just the other night, Holtzmann had turned to Erin inside the 'No Nightmare Fort' they still hadn't bothered to take down, and started to say something along the lines of: "Hey...would it be ok If maybe I--" Erin didn't hear the rest because she suddenly sprung up and yelled an incoherent "IGOTTAPEE." and shot out of there like a light.

Inside the bathroom she stared at the tile counter, thinking back to when Holtz had bandaged her hand so gently, and kissed her knuckles like she was some princess being courted by a royal suitor. That wasn't the last time she felt Jillian's lips on her skin. She still remembered the searing marks they left on her temple and forehead when she had awoke, sweaty and crying and shaking in fear of a stupid nightmare. Holtz held her and calmed her down like she had done it a million times, and Erin felt a little crazy admitting to this--but she wouldn't mind one more little nightmare if it meant she could wake up in Holtzmann's arms, being peppered with kisses and whispered to that everything's going to be ok.

She set her shoulders, looking at her reflection in the mirror. "You've got this, Gilbert. You've taken down and army of ghosts and been spit up on by an infant, you can do this."

She marched back to the fort, head held high, and threw open the sheet. "I hope you've got chap stick because these babies are ready to rumble..." she trailed off, looking down at the woman laying on the mattress.

Holtz was fast asleep, limbs going every which direction and mouth hanging wide open.

Erin sighed. "Dammit." 

* * *

 

Now, as she walked determinedly up to Holtz's lab, she held the same air of confidence. _This day will go down in history._ She thought. _As the day the two best people on the planet made out on a dirty table full of sharp and deadly equipment._

She saw Holtz's tuft of blonde hair sticking up behind an engine of some sort and heard her talking in hushed tones. "No, no, baby don't cry. I'm going to be home soon ok?"

Erin stopped dead in her tracks. _Baby?_

Holtz had started to softly shush whoever was on the phone. "I'll make you some dinner tonight, how about that? It'll be all your favorites, alright honey."

 _Honey?_ That was Erin's nickname, no one else in Holtz's life could be honey--it wasn't fair.

Did Holtzmann have a...girlfriend? No, not possible. She would have known about one by now...right? Come to think of it, Holtz wasn't the most open person when it came to her personal life..... _no,_ there was no way.

Erin turned on her heel, having heard enough, before a voice called out. "Hey, hot stuff, I didn't here you come in."

Erin turned back around, finding Holtzmann with a pair of yellow goggles on her head and a wide grin on her face.

"I had an idea earlier to spice up our 'area'," she made finger quotes. "I'm thinking we find a giant canvas of some sort--a big slab of metal will do, I'm sure I've got one clanging around here somewhere...anyways, we use that as a sort of base right? And then, we rig up a bunch of tiny doll heads to float around it eerily, maybe with some strips of a feather boa I'm also _pret-ty_ darn sure I have knockin' around here...you see where I'm going with this? Next we get bucket loads of condiments. I'm talking mayonnaise, ketchup, mustard, soy sauce, ranch dressing, Elmer's glue, etc, and then we'll--" she stopped pitching her MOMA instillation when she saw the look on Erin's face.

"Everything ok?" she frowned. "Was it the feather boa's? The boa's are too much, right?"

Erin shook her head, still thinking about the phone call she had just overheard. "No, everything's good, I'm totally good!" she made finger guns. "Everything's good in the Erin-hood!" she tried to rest her elbow casually on something, but since there was nothing near by she ended up just rotating her body at an awkward angle and resting her elbow out on thin air.

Holtz watched her struggle for a moment. "Did you get a hold of some catnip or something Gilbert? You look like you just swallowed a bucket of tar."

Erin had her face scrunched tight, eyes squeezed into slits and lips pressed together so firmly her face was turning a bright red.

She started backing away slowly, keeping eye contact with Holtz the whole time. "Umm I gotta go, I think Patty just called my name."

"I didn't hear anything."

"You didn't? Hmm strange you should probably go get your ears checked out that could be serious...WHAT PATTY?" Holtz jumped, staring at the sweaty and flushed woman with wide eyes. "THERE'S A GHOST WHERE? IN THE TAMPON AISLE OF WALGREENS?"she started to wobble down the stairs, wiping the sweat off her brow. "That sounds pretty bad, I better go check that out.... _shit!_ "

At that very moment, her foot slipped on the step. If not for Holtzmann, who dashed forward with lightning fast reflexes, she would have tumbled down each stair one by one like a slinky.

Holtz got a grip on Erin's waist, steadying her from behind. Erin turned, and for once had to look up at Holtz as she was standing on the step above her. "You ok?"

Erin gulped and nodded. "Thanks to you, y-you saved me."

Holtzmann shrugged. "Wouldn't be the first time, probably won't be the last." she sighed. "I really need to get you a bubble wrap jumpsuit one of these days."

Erin laughed nervously. "That'd be quite the fashion statement."

"Just as runway ready as tiny bow ties."

Erin rolled her eyes. "Will you ever stop with that? It was _one_ time."

"That's far too many times and you know it!"

She exhaled a breath out. "Yeah you're right."

Holtzmann's eyes lit up. "Ha! Now you have to admit I'm right about the toilet."

"Never."

Holtz hung her head dejectedly. "Yeah that one was a long shot."

Erin shuffled her feet and nearly failed to realize Holtzmann's hands still resting contentedly on her waist. She had gotten so used to her touches these day's that it had started to feel like the most natural thing in the world.

Holtz seemed to notice too, removing her hands slowly and wetting her lips, drawing Erin's eyes to them.

She suddenly remembered why she had come up here, and why her plans were deterred.

Erin cleared her throat."I better um, make sure Patty dealt with that ghost ok," she turned to walk the rest of the way down the stairs. "can't bring home any entities in a U by Kotex box amiright..."

Holtzmann watched her go and sighed. "No we sure can't," she shook her head."You're killin' me Gilbert."

* * *

 

That night, she laid in bed next to Holtz and thought about the phone call she had overheard a couple hours previously.

She would have known if Jillian had a girlfriend right? I mean the woman spends every waking moment at the firehouse, there's no way she had the time date--let alone have a serious relationship with another human being outside of her work.

Erin sighed. Girlfriend or no, she was going to kiss her. If she pushes her off in disgust, so be it. She'd rather be rejected then stay in the dark about the possibility of something happening between them.

 

The next day, Erin set out once again, determined to find Holtzmann and lay one right on those beautiful lips.

She found Abby bent over some paperwork at her desk and cleared her throat. "Have you seen Holtz anywhere?"

Abby raised an eyebrow. "What, you two detached from the hip finally?"

Erin's face heat up. "W-what no, I mean yes, n-no!"

Abby rolled her eyes. "She's outside, talking to some woman."

Erin immediately felt her heart drop into her stomach--and not in the good way.

She quickly jogged to the front windows, peaking out to the sidewalk near the doors, and found exactly what she hoped she wouldn't.

Holtzmann stood out in the sunlight, yellow glasses snug on her face, wearing that damned green crop top again that was paired with high waisted khaki's and mismatched socks, along with her black boots that looked to be completely untied. _She's going to trip on those and get hurt!_ One part of Erin's brain thought.

The other part was focused on the woman who was leaning in close and talking to Holtz in hushed tones. She looked to be about Holtzmann's age, maybe a little younger. Her blonde hair had more brown hues, but her eyes were almost an identical shade of blue to Holtz's. She wore a long blue maxi dress with a crochet shawl type-thing draped across her shoulders and around her neck hung an array of necklaces, each more bulky and hand made then the other. To top it all off, she had a wide brimmed sun hat atop her head, with a giant sunflower attached. To put it shortly, she looked like she belonged on the cover of _I Knit Ear Warmers For My Cat's And Glue Weird Shit On Random Objects Throughout My Seaside Home weekly._

Was this the woman Holtz had kept as a secret girlfriend all this time? And if so, why hide it from everyone and lead Erin on?

Holtzmann suddenly threw her hands up in an exasperated motion and moved to go back inside, leaving the woman on the sidewalk looking slightly shaken up.

Erin tried to act natural when she walked through the door, propping her leg up on the window sill and leaning her elbow against her knee. She pretended to look interested at the wall, running her finger up and down it casually.

Holtz still had a scowl on her face when she walked through the door, but softened as soon as she saw Erin."You do stretches there too? I think it's the best window in the house for ultimate quad release."

Erin blinked, surprised her plan had worked. "Uh, yeah. It's got good...quad stability."

Holtz nodded, genuinely agreeing. She then took off her glasses and ran a hand over her face with a heavy sigh.

"Everything...ok?"

"Yup, everything is great."

Erin wasn't convinced. "Does someone need a wittle hug?"

Holtzmann puckered her bottom lip out. "Maybe."

Erin took her leg off the windowsill and walked up in front of her, holding out her arms. "Bring it in." Holtz stepped forward, wrapping her arms around Erin's waist and burying her face in her hair, taking a deep breath.

Erin rubbed up and down her back for a second, rocking them from side to side. "You wanna talk about it?"

A muffled voice came from Erin's neck. "No."

"Ok."

They stood there for what had to have been a full minute, Holtz gripping onto Erin for dear life and Erin content to stay there forever, when suddenly two strong arms wrapped around the both of them sandwiching them even closer together.

"Aww, are we hugging? I love hugs." a familiar Australian accent nearly giggled above them.

"Kevin!" Holtzmann and Erin exclaimed at the same time.

"Especially group hugs, Patty get over here!"

A second voice came from behind Kevin. "Ya'll better not be hugging without Patty." another pair of arms wrapped around the two of them from the other side, creating a weird little human sandwich.

Erin was so smushed against Holtz, she was pretty sure there wasn't an inch of either of them that wasn't _not_ touching.

"ABBY, COME GET IN ON THIS." Patty's voice nearly burst Erin's ear drum it was so close.

"Get in on what...holy hell."

Kevin let go with one arm to motion to Abby. "Come on, you're part of the Ghostbusters too Abby!" She heard a sigh and suddenly, Abby was wrapping them all even tighter.

"That's the spirit!" Kevin rested his chin on top of Holtzmann's head, who grunted into Erin's neck.

"Haha, spirit, ghosts. Cuz we hunt ghosts."

"You don't hunt ghosts Kevin."

"I could if you guys would let me."

Abby and Kevin continued to bicker, as Erin felt a voice whisper against her ear. "How many years until we get out this?"

"Three at least."

"Yeah thought so."

* * *

 

Thankfully, they eventually did break apart despite Kevin's protesting. "That could have been a world record! Longest Hug Held Between A Group Of Ghostbusters."

Later that night, after everyone had gone home, Erin was determined to ask Holtz about the woman from today. She didn't want to pry--but if she didn't find out soon she was going to explode like a human confetti canon, riddling pieces of anxiety and self doubt all over the room.

She found Holtz digging around under one of the lab desks, butt sticking up in the air as she rummaged.

"Ah ha!" she sprung up suddenly, whirling around to look at Erin. A grin lit up her face as she held up a bright pink feather boa triumphantly. "I knew I had one of these bad boy's laying around."

Her smile dropped as soon as she saw the Erin. "What's with the grump face?"

"Who was the woman out front today?" she cut right to the chase.

Holtzmann _really_ didn't look happy now. "Nobody." she dropped the boa on the table and avoided meeting Erin's eyes.

"And what about the person on the phone yesterday?"

Holtz furrowed her brow. "What do you mean?"

"You were talking to someone, something about a dinner?"

"You were listening in on my private conversation?"

"It's not very private when you're out in the open up here!" Erin held her arms out. 

"Well maybe if you weren't attached to me with an umbilical cord all the time you wouldn't have heard anything!"

"First of all ew, second of all, what?"

Holtzmann sighed rubbing her forehead. "Nothing."

"No, please elaborate Jillian. I would lovvveee to hear how much I've been harassing _you_."

"Oh, don't you _Jillian_ me, and you're the one who moved in here out of the blue!"

"Out of the blue?? _You_ got me a bed!"

Holtz rolled her eyes. "That's besides the point."

"No it's really not. I just don't understand why you've been leading me on like this if you have a girlfriend!"

"Girlfriend?" Holtzmann scrunched her eyebrows, confused.

Erin scoffed. "Oh don't act like you don't know. The phone call? Martha Stewart out front? I've figured it out, you can quit the act."

Then Holtzmann did something Erin was not expecting. She started Laughing. _Laughing._

"What exactly is so funny?"

Holtz bent over at the waist, slapping her knee. "Y-you think Tracy i-is my g-irlfriend?" she got out through wheezes.

Erin dropped her arms. "Well yeah, if she's not your girlfriend who is she?"

Holtzmann finally stopped laughing and shook her head. "She's my cousin dingus."

Erin felt a weight on her shoulders lift. "Oh, _oh!_ " now, looking back on Tracy, she could see the resemblance. "Then who was on the phone?"

"My cat."

"Sorry?"

"Tracy takes care of my cat, Maurice, while I'm here. He misses me sometimes."

Erin suddenly felt like an idiot. "Ok..I guess that makes sense. But what got you so mad earlier?"

Holtz sighed, looking down at her shoes. "Maurice ate a baby."

"What?!"

"Not a real life baby, one of those little toy ones. We still don't know where he got it, but it's lodged in his small intestine and the surgery is a fortune."

Erin took a step towards her. "That's terrible, can't you just ask our government 'friends' to pay for it?"

Holtzmann shrugged, eyes still glued to the floor. "I thought about it, but I wanted to be my own money." Erin felt her heart swell with something she couldn't describe. "Tracy was here mostly because she was just tired of taking Mo to vet, she wants me to let him live here."

"Is that safe?"

"Probably not."

"What are you going to do?"

"Dunno."

It silent for a couple seconds when Holtz finally spoke. "You really thought she was my girlfriend?" Erin shrugged, swinging her arms nervously. "I guess"

"You really think there'd be anyone else but you?"

Erin's head snapped up. Holtzmann had lifted her eyes from the ground and was burning holes into her.

It wasn't like all the other times, Erin didn't have an a-ha moment of kiss realization. It was more like--yup. This is happening and it's happening right now.

She couldn't tell who came at who first, but they collided at the same time.

Jillians lips crashed into her's, and Erin responded with the same vigor. Both of their hands gripping at hair, clothes, skin, _anything_   to try and get closer.

 _This was it_ , she thought. _This is where I die and I'm completely fine with that._

Holtzmann grabbed her hips and pulled them closer together--chest to chest. She felt Holtz slow down the kiss a fraction, and she almost protested, but suddenly her tongue was in Erin's mouth.

Erin let loose a moan and grabbed the sides of Jillian's neck to gain better access. Upon hearing her moan, Holtz sped up the kiss again before taking Erin's bottom lip between her teeth.  She tugged on it a second, and then let it go,running her tongue over the mark she made. Erin nearly collapsed against her, so she reached out blindly, lips still drinking in the other woman, and swatted a bunch of stuff off the lab table. She ran Erin's back up against it and then grabbed under her thighs, hauling her up like she weighed nothing.

When the sharp edge of the table dug into Erin's lower back, she didn't notice. When she felt Holtz pick her up and set her butt on the table she definitely _did_ notice.

Jillian was situated between her thighs, still roughly kissing Erin's lips. She hadn't heard a sound out of her since they started, but when Erin wrapped both her legs around Holtzmann's waist and yanked her even closer, the blonde woman made a sound Erin would much like to have as a ringtone.

She tangled her hands in her hair, _oh god that hair_. She had wanted to touch it for so long, and now she had full access. It was softer then she expected, and she struggled for a moment trying to undo the intricate twist at the nape of her neck. Holtz must have noticed her silent frustration and smiled against her lips, before reaching back, and in one smooth motion, pulling her hair out.

Erin nipped at Jillian's bottom lip in a thank you and reached forward to tangle her hands in the golden locks. Holtz detached their lips, and Erin was a split second away from protesting again before she felt kisses peppering down her jaw.

She let out another moan, which spurred Holtz to suck on a portion of smooth skin at the base of her neck, which then led Erin to accidentally yank on a bit of hair she still had clutched tight in her hand. She almost apologized, and then she heard a whimper against her skin. An honest to god _whimper,_ just came out of Jillian Holtzmann's mouth.

Because of _her._

She pulled Jillian back up to her face, reconnecting their lips with a renewed vigor. Their kisses were hot and hungry, weeks of pent up frustration finally being released. Her skirt had ridden up during all of this and she felt Holtz's hand sliding up her thigh, dangerously close to her underwear line. She let loose a whimper of her own against her lips and Holtzmann smirked, scratching her nails softly against the skin of Erin's outer thigh.

Holtz removed her hand, earning a noise of protest from Erin, but instead she brought both hands up to cup her jaw, drawing her in closer. Their kisses got more languid, each one slower and more passionate then the last.

Finally, Erin pulled back a fraction to look at Holtzmann. She was breathing heavy, her hair a wild mess, her lips were swollen and bright red, and when she opened her eyes they were heavy lidded and glazed over a bit.

 _All because of me,_ Erin thought in satisfaction.

She imagined she looked similar, because Holtz reached out and smoothed a piece of hair behind her ear, pressing their foreheads together. Her voice was a gravelly whisper when it came out, making Erin question what she did to deserve any of this. "You're good at that."

"You're not so bad yourself."

They stood there, chests heaving and breaths mingling for what felt like hours. Erin felt like every bone in her body was on fire. She was aware of every square inch where their skin touched, chests pressed together, her legs wrapped so tightly around Holtzmann she was sure the other woman could feel her inner thigh muscles against her hip bones.

Holtz hands were running up and down her sides gently, the complete opposite to the way they had been practically ripping open her shirt a few minutes prior.

Erin didn't have to lean forward very far to kiss the little mole under her right eye. Jillian scrunched her nose with a wide dimpled grin and Erin decided that she had the best face on this entire godforsaken earth. 

"So you  _did_  want to kiss it." 

Erin rolled her eyes. "Of course I did." she reached forward and did it again. "And now I can do it whenever I want."

They tried to kiss, but kissing and smiling proved to be difficult. 

"Stop it."

"Stop what?"

"Smiling!"

Holtz's grin grew wider. "No."

Erin ran her lips down to her jaw and placed a long, open mouthed kiss to it. Holtzmann's smile dropped. She pulled Erin's head back up to her face and drew her in, reconnecting there lips. They moved in synchronicity, kisses slow and heated, and Erin started to get a little more bold. She ran her hands down Holtz's sides, stopping at the edge of her crop top and fiddling with the hem. She slowly ran her hands up and under it, feeling Jillian's burning skin just below her chest. 

When Holtzmann felt two soft hands roaming under her shirt, she bit Erin's bottom lip, earning a satisfying moan, and then Erin retaliated by moving her hands to edge of her sports bra, dangerously close to where she wanted her.

Erin slid her finger underneath the band of her bra, and suddenly Holtzmann growled against her lips, moving her own hand back to the edge of Erin's skirt and running her nails against her thigh. She reached her underwear line and did the same thing Erin was currently doing to her. Suddenly, Erin's tongue was in her mouth again and the hand that _wasn't_ up her shirt was grabbing at her hair, desperately trying to get her as close as humanly possible.

They both would have gladly continued on that path if not for the scream that startled both of them out of their fevered make out session.

"OH HELL NO. YA'LL ARE GETTING NASTY ON TOP OF ALL THAT DANGEROUS ASS EQUIPMENT?! WHAT IF YOU SET YOUR TITTY ON FIRE, HUH. WHAT THEN."

Erin immediately tore her lips off of Holtzmann's and drew her hand out from under her shirt, jumping back like she had been burned. Holtz was less worried, sliding her hand down to rest on Erin's knee and turning to look at the woman who had just entered. "Oh hey Patty."

Patty was standing in the doorway, arms crossed and fuming. "I should have expected this." she shook her head turning to go back down the stairs. "I forgot my keys. Was I coming up here to give the two sexually frustrated teenagers a friendly goodnight? Yes. Should I have just gone home? Definitely."

 They heard the front door open and then another shout. "BE SAFE AND DO _NOT_   BURN DOWN THIS ENTIRE ESTABLISHMENT WITH A TITTY FIRE." the door slammed closed and the firehouse was silent again.

 Holtzmann pressed one more searing kiss to her lips before stepping back a fraction, and Erin shimmied down off the table. When she stood, her legs wobbled and she struggled to keep her balance for a moment. Luckily Holtz still had a solid grip on her hips and steadied her. "Ok there Bambi?"

"Shut up."

Holtzmann smirked, wrapping her arms around Erin and pulling her into her chest. She pressed a kiss to her temple and Erin suddenly had a thought she couldn't help but blurt out.

"Your cats name is Maurice?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> FINALLY ITS DONE AND THE CHILDREN DIDN'T SET ANY TITTY FIRES. would love some feedback on the kissing scene because i don't have much experience writing any and they're fudging hard to write. btw this is NOT the end of this story i just want to clarify, i still have 539 ideas kickin around in the ol' noggin for these two gay idiots.


	11. Giraffe Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a certain someones sick and a certain other someone has to take care of them

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i told myself i was going to take a night off from writing but yet again here we are!! i'm so glad y'all liked the last chapter like seriously your comments had be squealing and crying o k this ones a little shorter but i hope you still enjoy it!!

Erin woke the next morning, feeling more elated then she's ever felt, with two warm arms wrapped around her from behind. She felt a sigh on her ear and then a lazy kiss being pressed against the back of her neck. "Good morning."

"G'morning." Holtzmann's voice came out low and throaty from sleep, and Erin turned around in her arms to get a good look at the other woman.

Somehow, even in her sleep she had missed Holtzmann's face. Last night, after being so rudely interrupted, they had gone to bed to find their fort had fallen down sometime during the day and Holtz begrudgingly didn't rebuild it after many pleadings from Erin about how tired she was. So now, the early morning sun shone through the windows and cast rays of light across their bodies, back lighting Jillian in a golden halo. Her hair was a tangled mop on top of her head and Erin reached out a hand and smoothed it down, earning another sigh from Holtz. She slowly blinked her eyes open, and gave Erin a lazy grin. "Hey."

"Hey yourself."

Holtzmann wiggled her body closer to Erin's and pressed a feather light kiss to her nose. "No nightmares?"

She shook her head. "No nightmares."

"Yeah well, the No Nightmare Fort may be gone but I am it's replacement." 

Erin laughed softly. "The No Nightmare Holtz, everyone in the city is going to want one."

Holtz scoffed. "They ain't gettin' me. I keep away bad dreams for Erin Gilbert and Erin Gilbert only." 

"Good, because I'm not letting you go that easy." 

Holtzmann buried her face in Erin's neck and grunted. "I don't want to get up." 

"Ok."

* * *

 

Two hours later, Holtz was still fast asleep and Erin was getting a leg cramp, so she gently shoved her limp body to the other side of the bed and stood to go get coffee. 

Patty sat at the kitchen table, history book open in front of her and mug of tea clutched in her hand. When she saw Erin, she blanched. "Glad to see you still have both your titties." 

Erin rolled her eyes, moving to get a mug from the cupboard."You haven't seen Holtzmann yet." 

Patty's eyes widened and Erin let out a bark of laughter. "I'm joking, jeez!" 

Patty shook her head as Erin filled her mug with steaming coffee. "Girl, you have been spending too much time with Holtzy."

She shrugged, walking over to sit at the table with Patty. "Not enough time if you know what I mean." she wiggled her eyebrows, just as Abby walked into the room. 

"Abby, help! Erin's been possessed by some sex crazed she-demon!" 

"What?!" Abby took the phrase literally, immediately grabbing the closest weapon she could find, which happened to be a frying pan, and came towards Erin with it raised above her head. "Get out of my friend you malevolent succubus!" 

"Abby, Abby she was joking!" Erin protectively crossed her arms over her head. 

Patty snatched the frying pan out of Abby's hands."Not literally, good lord woman." 

Abby looked almost disappointed. "Oh, then what are you talking about?"

"I forgot to tell you? Erin and Holtzy got it on in that dirty ass lab."

Abby's eyes widened. "Patty! We did not 'get it on' we just....made out and stuff."

"Really? Cuz from where I was standing ya'll looked two seconds away from ripping each other's panties off and going to clown town!" 

Erin scrunched her face. "Just say underwear, panties is gross."

Abby looked between the two of them. "Wait, you and Holtz?" 

"Yeah...?"she looked up at her insistently.

" _Finally!_ " 

"Wait, you knew we had a...thing?"

Abby and Patty started laughing. "Anyone with eyes and a brain knows Erin. Hell, even Kevin mentioned something about 'those two lovebirds' just the other day." 

"Wow really? I thought we were being a little...secretive with it all."

Patty scoffed. "Secretive? Ya'll were about as secretive as two elephants stomping around central park, holding trunks."

Erin was about to protest when a yell carried down from upstairs. "ERINNNNN! CAN YOU COME HERE PLEASE MY DARLING?"

She ignored Abby and Patty's school girl giggling and miming of elephant trunks, and got up from the table, leaving her coffee standing cold. "Real mature you guys." she muttered on her way up the stairs. 

She found Holtzmann still laying in bed, with the covers pulled up to her chin and arm thrown over her eyes, shielding them from the sunlight streaming in. Erin climbed into bed on the other side and sat facing her on her knees. "What's up?" 

Holtz lifted her arm off a fraction to look at her. "I don't feel good."

"Oh," Erin pretended to look miffed. "I thought you just missed me."

"That too."

She lifted her arm off completely to get a better look at her, and Holtz protested with a groan. "Light. Bad."

Erin frowned. She looked paler then usual, wisps of hair were stuck to her forehead and she squinted up with heavy lidded eyes."I feel like...I was hit with a tractor....and then thrown into a dryer on the heavy duty cycle. Just clunking around in there for ages."

Erin reached out and felt Holtzmann's forehead with the back of her hand. She sucked in a sharp breath between her teeth. "Holtz you're burning up." 

"No you're burning up." she reached out and swatted Erin's hand away, before kicking her legs rapidly, trying to shake off the covers. "But no I actually legitimately feel like more than just my titty is on fire." 

Erin stood up and Holtz immediately protested. "Please don't leave me, I won't say titty again I promise." she squeezed her eyes shut tight, like it hurt to keep them open. "What about boob? Or maybe boobular. Boobulas? No that sounds gross. How about breast? Is that too clinical? Knocker is a little foul..." 

Erin watched her ramble with an amused grin. "I'm just getting a thermometer, chill." 

"Yeah that's what I'm trying to do Erin it's fucking hot in here."

Erin blanched. Holtz dropping the F bomb should not turn her on--Patty does it all the time. But at this point, everything about Holtzmann turned her on.

She left the feverish woman to her boob talk and went to the bathroom. She wasn't even sure if they _had_ a thermometer but she dug around the cabinet anyway. Thankfully, Abby had probably thought to buy one and she found it nestled between a screwdriver and a tube of something that she hoped to be toothpaste.

She walked back to their bedroom to find Holtzmann in the same position as when she left, the only difference being that she had thrown off her shorts and tank top, laying on the bed in only her sports bra and underwear. 

Erin stood frozen for a second, before Holtz spoke, eyes still shut tight. "Hey Erin, would you be a dear and close the curtains? My corneas are being seared by Helios himself and my head feels like when Zeus split open his skull to birth Athena." 

Erin tore her eyes away long enough to close the blinds, eventually finding her voice. "Do you always talk about greek myths when your sick?"

Holtz shrugged. "Dunno, I don't remember anything I do when I'm sick. I'm usually alone so I don't have anyone to tell me either." 

Erin's heart sunk. She kneeled next to her on the bed and placed her cold hand on the other woman's forehead again. "Well get used to it."

Holtz sighed, leaning into Erin's touch. "Your hand feels just like the snow goddess, Chione."

Erin rolled her eyes. "You're such a nerd."

"Thanks."

She tapped Holtz's chin. "Open wide."

Holtzmann stretched her mouth open comically, letting Erin slip the thermometer under her tongue. "Close." she snapped it shut, finally opening her eyes to gaze up at Erin. 

She gave her a lazy smile through the thermometer. Erin looked back at her with an amused grin of her own. 

She noticed Holtz's hair stuck to back of her neck, and took the ponytail off her wrist to tie it up in a loose knot on the top of her head. "Better?" Holtzmann nodded, gazing up at her with a look Erin couldn't identify. At that moment, the thermometer finally beeped. She took it out of Holtz's mouth, who smacked her lips together with a scowl. 

**_101_ **

Erin sighed. "You definitely have a fever, but I think we already knew that."

Holtzmann groaned. "I feel like my body is being pulled through a swamp. Like a hot, sticky, southern swamp. I've got swamp ass Erin."

"Have you noticed any other symptoms these last few days?"

Holtz shrugged. "Sore throat I guess. But I thought it was just because Mercury was in retrograde." 

Erin let out another sigh, placing her hand on the side of Holtzmann's face and running her thumb along her cheek. "Poor baby." Holtz leaned into her touch, puffing out a breath through her lips. 

"I'm going to go get something to reduce your fever ok?" she pressed a kiss to Jillian's forehead. "Hang tight, swamp ass."

She stood and then heard a voice call behind her. "Why the _hell_ did you kiss my forehead?"

"I regret it, I regret it so bad."

"That is like, the mothership of sweat right there. That's the sweat factory."

"It was so gross, I'm not doing it again there I'm sorry."

"My entire body is like that, literally every square inch. You kiss, you die." 

"I'll take my chances elsewhere, don't worry."

"Thank you for giving me something to look forward to."

"No problem."

* * *

 

Erin searched high and low in the bathroom for medicine, coming up empty. She checked all over downstairs too, still--nothing. 

_We have proton packs on hand but we don't have any freaking fever reducers._ She came out of her thoughts when she nearly ran into Abby. "Hey."

"Hey, what's gotten you all sweaty--wait I don't want an answer to that."

Erin sighed. "Holtz is sick, do we have meds for a fever in this place?"

Abby frowned. "Not that I know of. But me and Patty were just about to go to the store, we can pick some up." Patty appeared behind her, purse in hand. 

"Why are you going to the store?"

"Kevin poured all the milk down the drain because it 'tasted off'" Patty rolled her eyes. "Apparently the guy has never had almond milk before."

Erin ran a hand across her forehead. "Ok, just hurry back."

They nodded, both turning to leave. Once they were out the door, Erin turned to go back upstairs, only to come face to face with Holtzmann. She was still wearing only her bra and underwear, looking up at something behind Erin with wide eyes. 

"Holtz! What are you doing out of bedmphhf--" Holtzmann cut her off by slapping her hand across her mouth, still looking at something over Erin's shoulder.

"Erin, shut your beautiful mouth hole and don't. move."she spoke through her teeth in a hushed whisper. Erin tried to turn her head to see, but Holtz stopped her with a hiss. 

"What did I just tell you?"

Erin blinked at her. 

"I don't want to spook you babe, but there is. a very tall. very malicious. giraffe. standing. behind. you." 

Erin's eyes widened a fraction and she turned to look again. "Don't! Do not. look into. his eyes. Then he will know you are the predator. It's too late for me, we've already made eye contact."

Erin peeled her hand off her mouth and started walking her backwards. "Jillian, sweetheart, there's no giraffe." 

Holtz finally tore her eyes off of the space behind Erin and looked at her fearfully. "That's because only those who have seen death can see Eugene."

"That's from Harry Potter, and Eugene the death giraffe?" 

"Don't make fun of his name he's sensitive about it."

"Oh right sorry, I don't want to piss off Eugene."

"You really don't." she said with a laugh.

"Lets get you back to bed honey."

She gently took Holtzmann's shoulders, steering her up the stairs and back into their room.  Holtz collapsed face first onto the mattress with a groan as Erin went to find some washcloth's, hopefully ones that weren't oil stained. 

She thankfully found some relatively clean ones, and wet them under cold water in the bathroom sink. Holtzmann was still on her stomach on the bed when Erin came back, and she crawled next to her before laying one of wet washcloths down flat on the sheets. "Roll over."

Holtz slowly rolled onto her back and right onto the washcloth, letting out a low moan. Erin then placed the other one on her forehead, earning another noise of relief. "That should help with the fever a bit, Abby and Patty are getting you some meds."

Holtzmann peaked up at her from behind the washcloth. "You're so pretty Erin."

"You're not so bad yourself."

"No like...I mean you are soooo pretty. Why aren't you a model? Or like I dunno...labeled the sexiest woman alive by the planet itself."

Erin felt heat creep along her neck. "I don't know Jillian, why don't you call the planet up tomorrow and ask."

"I think I'll do that..." her voice trailed off as her eyes shut. Erin started trailing different pathways along her bare stomach with the tip of her finger, and eventually the other woman's breathing evened out. 

She leaned forward and pressed a surprisingly non-sweaty kiss to Holtzmann's collarbone. "Sweet giraffe dreams, my gorgeous little weirdo."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> might do a continuation of sick!holtz in the next chapter being all lovey and affectionate with erin. also i just really love writing holtz doing weird shit


	12. Puzzle Pieces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> holtz is an affectionate little shit when she's sick and erin is all for it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i decided to do another sick!holtz chapter cuz ya'll loved it so much anddd i had to write holtz deliriously complimenting everything about erin o k
> 
> the next chapter will hopefully be longer and with more kissing so stay tuned!!

It had been nearly an hour and a half and Patty and Abby still weren't back with Holtz's meds. 

Erin paced back in forth in front of the door, anxiously awaiting a reply to her dozens of texts. Her phone finally dinged and the screen lit up with a message from Patty.

 _calm your flaming tits girl theres been some kind of accident traffic at a stand still_  

Erin sighed, shoving her phone back in her pocket and wringing her hands. Holtzmann was still asleep upstairs and her fever only seemed to be getting worse. She had re-wet the washcloths about three times now, they got hot on Holtz's skin so fast she could barely keep up. 

She filled a glass of water up in the kitchen, intending to try and get some fluids in Holtz when she woke up, but once upstairs, her plans were deterred. The bathroom light shone on through the open doorway and the unmistakable sound of water splashing met her ears.

Erin quickly set the glass of water on the ground before darting inside, what she found was not at all what she expected.

Holtzmann lay inside the bathtub, which was nearly overflowing with bubbles, holding a can of Pringle's that were partially submerged in the water. A giant sphere of suds sat atop her head, crowning her the most delirious and lovable bubble queen in all of the lands.

She reached a soapy hand in to grab another Pringle, and turned her head to look at Erin. "Hey honey."

Erin stared at her in disbelief for a minute. How had she not heard her get up and clunk around in here? 

Holtzmann was gazing at the Pringle in her hand curiously, she dipped the chip into the water and scooped up some bubbles onto it like salsa. Erin finally reacted when she started to bring it up to her mouth. "Holtzmann, _no!_ "

She darted forward, leaning down to swipe the chip out of her hand and throw it on the ground. Holtz pouted up at her with sad puppy dog eyes. "That was my bubble chip."

"Your bubble chip was toxic."

"Yes that's what makes it a good bubble chip."

Erin knelt down beside her. "Get out, you need to get back in bed."

Holtz sunk down in the bubbles until they were to her chin. "No. It's safe in here."

"It's safe in bed too."

"There's no bubbles in bed."

Erin sighed, moving to the end of the tub to reach her hand in and pull the drain. When she made contact with the water, she gasped. "Holtz! This water is freezing cold!"

"Yes so."

" _So_ , your body temperature is raising even higher. Get out right now!"

"No!"

Erin unplugged the drain at that very moment and Holtzmann started frantically gathering the bubbles on top of her. Thankfully, she was still wearing her bra and underwear so Erin didn't have to deal with yet _another_ thing. 

The suds had started to escape down the drain and Holtz was desperately grabbing at the remaining ones. "My friends!" she looked down at her body, noticing the bubbles that were stuck to her. She patted them softly. "At least I still have you guys."

Erin yanked the handle to turn on the water, making sure it was on the warm setting, before grabbing the shower head and pointing it right on Holtz. 

She immediately recoiled, shrinking into a ball in the corner of the bathtub as Erin hosed her down with warm water. She started fake crying. "It burns!"

"It does not."

"Yes it does, I feel like I'm drowning in the fiery pits of hell." 

Erin rolled her eyes and continued to spray her until all the bubbles were gone. Holtz had her bottom lip puckered out, and water droplets hung heavy on her eyelashes. The top knot Erin had done earlier was long gone,and her hair hung in a wet curtain around her face.

She dashed to grab a towel and came back to Holtz still pouting, she quickly wrapped the towel around her shoulders and tried to nudge her to stand. "Come on, lets go."

Holtz stubbornly looked up at her. "No."

Erin exhaled. "What do I have to do to make you get out?"

Holtzmann tapped her chin thoughtfully before coming to a conclusion. "Kiss me."

"I wish, but you're sick."

"I'm not contagious."

"How do you know that?"

"I know things Erin. Many things."

"How about a deal? Once you are no longer sick," Holtz started to protest. "Uh uh uh, let me finish. Once you are no longer sick I will gladly make out with you on the mouth for three hours _and_ touch your boob."

Holtzmann thought about it for a moment. "Ok fine, deal."

She started to stand, but quickly fell back down onto her butt, cradling her head in her hands. "Wooo, mama's dizzy."

Erin reached out and put an arm around her shoulder to help her up. She had to practically drag Holtz back to bed, but luckily lugging around proton packs had built her up some muscle. She deposited her on the bed and grabbed a blanket from the pile still left over from their fort. Erin sat next to Holtz on the mattress and pulled the towel off her, replacing it with the blanket that had little cartoon ghosts all over it. 

Holtzmann groaned into the pillow and climbed up into Erin's lap with a heavy sigh, wrapping her arms around her neck and burying her face in her hair. Erin cradled her in her arms like a baby, rocking them back and forth and rubbing circles on her back. Holtz turned her head up to look at Erin and gazed at her with lovingly dopey eyes. "You have...the greatest face I've ever seen. It's like.....if every great face on the planet came together and made one, huge, great face...that would be yours."

No matter how many times Holtzmann complimented her in her delirious state, butterflies still erupted inside her stomach.

Holtz had started twirling a strand of Erin's hair around her finger. "And your hair...it's like a warm brownie of love and softness....I want to eat it sometimes."

"Please don't eat my hair baby."

Holtz groaned. "And your voice...it's like a gentle summers breeze...my ear drums go on vacation every time you speak." her sentences were slurred together like she was drunk.

Erin nearly jumped when she felt feverishly warm lips leave a trail of kisses on her neck and down her collarbone. She closed her eyes for a minute, forgetting about how many germs were probably being left behind.

"Don't," Holtzmann started cackling against her neck, which tickled. "Don't even get me started on your bod, ok? I could talk about every. single. inch. of your body for hours...and I haven't even seen all of it yet, unfortunately." she muttered the last part with a tinge of disappointment in her voice. 

At this point, Erin felt like she too had a high fever, judging by the heat radiating from her skin.

Holtz left one last lazy open mouthed kiss against her neck, and threaded her fingers through Erin's. "Look at that...look at how they fit together Erin."

She was turning their joined hands back and forth and gazing at them with wonder. "It's like the universe made us into puzzle pieces right? And it kept shoving us into places we don't fit," she looked up at Erin. "You see where I'm going with this? So like, it's if you tried to put a corner piece in the middle, it just wouldn't work. But, once you find the right spot,"she aligned their hands so each of their fingers touched."everything...clicks." 

Jillian looked up at her from where her head was laying on her chest, and Erin was looking right back at her with an unreadable expression. Suddenly, she leaned down and captured her lips in a heated kiss--quite literally, Holtz was still burning up. 

Erin ignored the fact that she was going to most _definitely_ get whatever Holtz had now, instead focusing on the way the other woman kissed her lazily, in no rush to go faster or to stop. 

When they pulled back, Erin rested her head on Jillian's forehead, playing with their fingers in her lap.

"What about germs?"

"Fuck germs," Holtz's eyes widened in delight. "I had to do that before I exploded."

"Aww, you know I would have hosed you off the wall like a can of beans though."

"Do you...often have run ins with exploding bean cans?"

"You would be _astounded_ at how many close calls I've had with those ornery little nuggets."

Erin brushed a strand of hair off her sweaty forehead. "Speaking of, do you think you could try and eat something?" 

Holtzmann grimaced, laying her head back on Erin's chest. "I think if I did that you'd be cleaning more than beans off the wall."

"Yikes, ok. Water at least?"

"Would it mean you'd have to get up?"

"Yes."

"Then no, water can fuck off."

Erin laughed, rubbing her hands up and down Holtz arm. "Do I have to hold you down to get you to drink something?"

"I mean, I'd much rather you hold me down in a _different_ capacity, but in theory yes."

Holtzmann must have heard Erin's heart racing from where her head lay against her chest because she chuckled. "Damn Gilbert, just about anything can get you riled up can't it?" 

Erin glared, even though Holtz couldn't see. "No, not anything. Just...most things." she could feel Jillian's grin getting wider against her skin. "Ok...most things....concerning you."

It was silent, and then she felt a kiss being pressed onto the skin peaking out above her shirt. 

"What, no teasing?"

Holtz shook her head. "Nope, I was going to say the same thing about you."

Erin let the familiar warm feeling tingle across her body and kissed the top of Holtzmann's head. "You're a big ol' sap when your sick, did you know that?"

Holtz snuggled deeper into her neck, letting out a sigh. "No, but now I do." 

Suddenly, a different voice pierced loudly across the second floor. "OK, I'M COMING IN AND Y'ALL HAVE TWO SECONDS TO LOOK DECENT OR ELSE PATTY IS ABOUT TO SEE A WHOLE LOTTA BARE SCIENCE ASS." 

Holtz cackled against her neck and Erin sighed. "Patty, we're not naked!" 

Patty shuffled behind the tarp, peaking through her fingertips. When she saw the position they were in she dropped her hand and looked exasperated. "Now this is almost worse. That is the cutest shit I have ever seen." she called over her shoulder. "ABBY, GET UP HERE."

Barely a minute later, Abby was peaking her head around. "What's going on-awwwww!" She looked at the two of them with a wide grin. "Now that's-that's just adorable, Kevin! Kevin c'mere!"

Two seconds later, Kevin was bounding into the room. "Whats up boss?" Abby pointed to a smirking Holtz and red faced Erin on the bed. "Oh hey guys, that looks comfy." he looked at Abby impatiently and jabbed a finger to the door. "Can I go? I've got about three hours of Cupcake Wars filling up my DVR." she sighed, waving him off. "Y-yes you're free to go Kev."

"Awesome." he waved to them all and spun on his heel, nearly running right into the curtain tarp. 

Patty suddenly remembered something and pulled a little bottle out of her pocket. "Sorry it took so long," she threw the bottle and Erin caught it before it knocked Holtz in the side of the head. "Feel better Holtzy."

Her and Abby turned to leave but not before she threw one last thing over her shoulder. "But I don't think you'll be needing those med's, it looks like Dr.Gilbert's prescribed you something special already."

Holtz let out a bark of laughter against her neck and Erin rolled her eyes. "Good god, they're never letting this go are they?"

Another kiss was pressed to her skin. "Nope, but it's more fun that way." 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i created a tumblr outside of my main so go follow/send me messages/have a generally fun gay time over there!! 
> 
> safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com


	13. Driver Roll Up The Partition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the team has to go to a fancy party and holtz and erin are really bad at keeping their hands off each other

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> GET ANOTHER COLD SHOWER READY FOR THIS ONE FOLKS turns out i write the best hot n heavy scenes at four am

Nearly a week had passed since Holtzmann had gotten sick and thankfully Erin had not caught whatever it was she had. Oddly enough, seeing as she had kissed her quite a few times(it was just so hard not too when she was being cute and clingy) and was at her cuddling beck and call every second she'd been ill. 

Now it was back to the old grind, with the exception being Erin and Holtz's now unofficial-official relationship. Not too much had changed, except for the fact that sleeping in the same bed was way more fun now (even though so far they only ever slept) and going out on calls with a hot, baddass, girlfriend proved to be a _bit_ distracting. Every time she glanced over at Holtz, taking out one baddie or another, she'd get sidetracked by the way she'd blow her floop of hair out of her eyes with a puff of breath, and the way she'd plant her feet in a lot squat before pulling out her proton gun and blasting a ghost to oblivion. She seemed to be developing new ways to turn Erin on at inopportune times--her recent favorite being: after she'd use the proton gun, she'd blow on the top of it with a wink in Erin's direction, like some 18th century lesbian cowboy intent on disrupting Erin's focus.

Patty was the one that had to jolt her out of her trance each time with a shake of her head "You got it bad man." or a scream, those were usually when they were in very immediate danger. _"ERIN I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU'D RATHER SCREW HOLTZ RIGHT HERE ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR OF THIS DIRTY ASS 7/11 INSTEAD OF CATCH THESE GHOSTS, WE'RE GOING TO HAVE A PROBLEM."_ \--that one usually got her attention.

Now as she made her way up the stairs and to Holtzmann's lab, she couldn't help the jolt of excitement that ran through her. Number one, just seeing Holtz after any number of minutes apart was exciting enough in itself, number two was that she was going to ask her on their first proper date. Well--date was a generous way of putting it.

Abby had pitched the gala to Erin downstairs; the mayor was intent on honoring all of them at a charity ball titled "The Ghostest With The Mostest (money)" some of the mayor's own private collection was being auctioned off, as well as some non-lethal and pretty useless items being donated by the Ghostbusters themselves. The mayor had finally embraced the whole ghost ordeal, mainly when he realized how much money it was raking in. And as much as Erin didn't want to fake laugh at boring politicians ghost jokes all night--she would _gladly_ do it with Holtz's waist clutched in one hand and a glass of champagne in the other.

The familiar sound of clanging metal met Erin's ears as she made it to the second floor. Holtzmann out of commission last week meant no working, and these past couple day's she had barely left the lab to make up for it. 

When she heard Erin come in, Holtz's head popped up from where it was bent over something on the table, she grinned and waved a giant gloved hand in greeting. Her glasses were snug over her eyes, as well as the similar looking goggles resting right above them on her head. A piece of some sort of wire stuck out her mouth and she had many stains on her long duster like jacket. Erin watched her for a moment. _Yep. This is the woman I've chosen to court._

"Erin c'mere, I've got something reaaal cool to show you."

She walked around the table to look at what Holtz was pointing at, expecting some new innovative ghost contraption, instead she found a...blender.

"Oh...c-cool, what is it exactly?" she hoped for a different answer then 'blender'

"It's a ghost blender."--no luck.

"Does it kill them...somehow?"

Holtz shook her rapidly with a laugh. "Oh no no no, I dulled the blades in there." she tapped the lid with a pair of pliers. "This baby just sucks the ghosts, twirls them around for a bit at an _incredibly_ high velocity, and then spits them back out disorientated and confused."

"Sooo, it's a blender?"

"A very paranormal blender Erin."

"Can it still perform normal, smoothie making tasks? I like a green drink now and again." 

"Of course. I wouldn't make a ghost blender if it meant compromising it's original intended purposes." Holtz made a face like Erin was being the ridiculous one in this situation.

"Great, glad we got that sorted out." she swung her arms and nervously wrung her hands out. Holtzmann noticed with a crook of her head. "Everything ok?"

"Y-yeah, great! I just was talking to Abby downstairs and she mentioned this thing with the mayor that we should probably attend, seeing as the government still pays for most of our stuff." she told Holtz about the gala, who listened with a blank face. 

Only when she had finished did Holtzmann pull her glasses off one side of her ear, letting them dangle off the other, and gave her another confused head tilt. "Is it required we go?" 

Erin tried to focus on speaking, and not how cute Holtz looked when she furrowed her brow. "No, not really, but I thought it might be...fun."

"Fun?" she said incredulously.

"Yeah, fun!" she circled around Holtz, slipping her arms around her waist from behind. "Champagne, dancing, fun." 

Holtzmann relaxed against her, pulling off her gloves to link her hands on top of Erin's. "Plusss," she drew out the word. "I thought maybe, it could be like our first...date?" 

Holtz's eyebrows scrunched again. "Didn't us making out on a lab table count as a first date?" 

Erin rolled her eyes, resting her chin on the smaller woman's shoulder. "No! Plus I've never seen you in...formal wear."

"Oh I see, this is just a ploy to see me in a pretty dress huh?" Holtz smirked.

"N-no, I mean yes--no!" she could feel Holtzmann's laughter against her chest. "And it doesn't have to be a dress! It can be anything. you. want." she punctuated each word with a kiss to the side of Holtz's exposed neck, and knew she'd finally got her. 

She let her weight relax even more into Erin and let out a grunt-whimper. "Fine." a triumphant grin spread across Erin's face. "But, but! Only if you promise to break a champagne flute over the head of any sleazy politician who inevitably tries to hit on me."

She scoffed. "If any one of them even breathes in our direction without your express permission, I will gladly break a whole wine rack over their heads."

"That's my girl." Holtz turned her head to capture her lips in a kiss that was way too short for Erin's liking. Holtzmann read her face when she pulled back and smirked. "Don't worry, as soon as you see me in 'all dressed up'" she made finger quotes. "there'll be a lot more where that came from."

Erin felt her face heat up and she untangled her arms from around Holtz before she did something she regretted. Holtzmann still had a shit-eating grin on her face and turned to rest her hip against the lab table. "When is this thing by the way?"

Erin casually ran a finger up Holtzmann's arm, not meeting her eyes. 

"Tonight."

* * *

 

  
Later that evening, Erin rushed back to her apartment--which she was pretty sure she was about to be evicted from--and dug frantically through what was left hanging in her closet. She finally found what she was looking for and snagged it off rack, along with a pair of shoes buried amongst others she never wore anymore. Turns out heels + running around chasing ghosts _do not_ mix. She also grabbed a couple of accessories out of the unnecessarily large wooden jewelry box she never had bothered to fill with much of anything. Luckily, there was just enough to finish off the look she had planned. She really hoped Holtz wasn't wearing anything too over the top--they couldn't clash during their first public appearance as a couple. 

She made it back to the firehouse just before sundown, dashing up the stairs and past Kevin who was trying to tie his bow tie ("It's like Jenga.") Patty and Abby were getting ready at their respective homes and were going to meet up with the three of them where the gala was being held--the newly renovated and now-giant-vortex-to-the-other-side-free Mercado hotel.

Erin made it to the second floor, turning to go to the bathroom to change before skidding to a halt. Holtz was lazily spinning in a chair, still clothed in the same outfit as earlier with an oil smudge on her cheek. When she saw Erin she did a two-finger salute. "Howdy."

"Holtz! We have to leave in twenty minutes, why aren't you getting ready?"

She stopped spinning to look at her watch. "Huh, guess so." 

"Don't make me take off your clothes myself!" she realized how that sounded too late. Holtz was already standing up with a look on her face Erin had grown too familiar with.

"Be my guest," she walked over a few steps and pressed a languid kiss onto Erin's cheek. "Relax, I'll go get ready now."

Erin sighed. "Thank you, and nothing with any kind of stain on it!" Holtz was already walking behind the tarp that blocked off their room. "I make no promises!" she called over her shoulder.

* * *

 

27 minutes later, Holtz stood at the bottom of the stairs, tapping her nails boredly against the banister. She had come down ten minutes ago, and after helping Kev with his bow tie, there was only one left who needed to get their cute little butt out the door.

"Erin!" she called up. "We need to go if we want to get those little appetizer guys, what are those called?" Kevin cut in. "Horse divorce." Holtz narrowed her eyes. "No Kev, though that is a wonderful name for an indie rock band, it is not what I am talking about." 

"Hors d'oeuvres," a voice called from above them."I believe the word you're looking for is Hors d'oeuvres."

"I'm pretty sure that's two words..." she drowned out Kevin's voice when a figure appeared at the top of the stairs. She started carefully walking down so as not to trip, and Holtz's vision tunneled. 

Erin was wearing a dark blue fitted gown that flared out at the bottom like a little trumpet, it clung to her figure in all the right places and had two sheer slits running down the sides of her torso, revealing the smooth skin there. The sleeves rested on the tops of her arms, her chest and collarbone exposed completely and allowing for a necklace to rest just above her-- _don't stare at her cleavage, don't stare at her cleavage_ \--too late. Holtz's eyes were soon drawn further up, where Erin had her hair curled in ringlets and pulled back on each side to reveal her face. And boy, was Erin's face her favorite thing on this planet. Holtzmann had no idea how she had managed to blend her eyeshadow so perfectly in such a short amount of time, but somehow she had done it. Her lips were a deep red, and Holtz couldn't wait to capture them in her own later, or more preferably--now. 

 

Erin was halfway down the steps when she got a good look at Jillian, and nearly tripped on the edge of her dress and tumbled down each stair because of it.

Her hair hung in soft golden waves, framing her face that had a small smattering of makeup, lips especially pink. Her outfit was thankfully not stained with anything that Erin could see--but gave her a heart attack nonetheless. She had on a black blazer type jacket that most _definitely_ had shoulder pads, it was lined with three silver buttons on each side, creating a v-shape where they met in the middle. Her pants were simple black dress slacks that went to ankles, and instead of the usual combat boots or oxfords there was a pair of black pumps. Erin didn't even know Holtzmann _owned_ a pair of heels. She imagined her facial expression mirrored Holtz's current look of _you are so gorgeous and I either want to keep looking at you forever or just tear off your clothes right here and right now._

Someone cleared their throat, reminding them that they weren't alone. "Uh Erin, I know those stairs are really scary--I mean, why do you think I never go to the second floor--but we really need to get going before all the good Horse Divorce's are gone."

Erin tore her eyes away from Holtz long enough to hike up her dress and make it to the bottom of the steps, Kevin had already walked out the door and they stood in the drafty silence for a moment. Jillian slowly walked up to her, heels clicking on the tile, and slid her hands around Erin's waist. They were the same height in their shoes and Erin didn't have to lean down to press her forehead to Holtzmann's. 

"You look stunning," she extenuated the word and Erin linked her arms around Holtz's neck. "I was going to same thing about you."

"GUYYYYYYS. OUR DRIVER'S WAITING!" Kevin's voice whined from outside, breaking off their moment. Holtz sighed, and stepped away from Erin, holding out her hand. "Let's get this over with my dear."

* * *

 

Pulling up to the Mercado gave Erin a strong sense of deja-vu, and by the way Holtz squeezed her hand tighter, she felt it too. Kevin didn't seem to be bothered though, instead handing the driver a large wad of cash through the partition. "Um, Kev? Doesn't this just charge a card?"

"What?"

"The Uber. They just charge your card, no cash needed."

"What's an Uber?" Holtz and Erin exchanged looks. "This is my good friend Steel." The driver turned back to give them a gap-toothed and yellow smile,his head was completely bald and shining off the light coming from the hotel entrance, and tattoos reached up his wrinkled neck and stretched onto his face. Kevin patted him on the shoulder. "Thanks again buddy, I owe you one." 

Erin practically dragged Holtz out of the car and onto the pavement, smoothing her dress down with a mutter. "We are _not_ driving back with Steel." 

Holtzmann shrugged, threading her arm through Erin's. "I thought he obeyed traffic laws well enough." she rolled her eyes, looking back to see Kevin coming towards them with a grin. "Steel say's he's got a present for me when he gets back, what do you think it could be?" 

"How about we go get you some Horse Divorce, ok Kev?"

 

Once inside, the grandeur of the Mercado was much the same as when they first stepped foot in there a couple months back, and the ballroom of the hotel was no exception. Large windows lined the walls, draped in velvet red curtains, and the glittering chandeliers cast shadows across the intricately carved ceilings. A grand piano--much like the one that had almost killed them--was shining in the corner of the room where a young man in a tux played a classical melody, a whole orchestra sat near him, doting out the same tune. Tables spanned the perimeter and in the middle was a large dance floor, filled to the brim with talking, dancing, and drinking government employees, each more dazzling and dressed up than the last. 

Holtz let out a low whistle and Erin nodded in agreement. A woman in a low cut glittering dress glided past them, her gown looked like it had been woven through with diamonds, and the necklace that lay on her chest were most certainly made of something of that caliber. "And here I thought I was overdressed."

They moved further into the thick of the crowd, dodging waiters with silver gilded platters of champagne and food "Horse Divorce!" (they lost Kevin pretty quickly) scanning faces for Abby and Patty. They finally found them, both wearing gowns similar to Erin's, and chatting with a man and a woman. Chatting was a better word for it--it looked more like they were being attacked at every angle with questions. Patty caught Erin's eye and made a frantic gesturing behind Abby's back _run, run while you still can._ They got the message and ducked out of view, heading towards one of the empty tables lining the dance floor. 

Holtz sank back into the chair she had pulled out and propped her heels up on the edge of the table with a sigh. Erin sat next to her, not bothering to correct her etiquette at this point and grabbed two champagne flutes off a passing waiter. She handed one to Holtzmann who took a swig before making a face and setting the glass on the table next to her. "I hate champagne."

Erin took a sip of her own, feeling the bubbles tickle down her throat. "Really?" Holtz nodded, chewing on a fingernail. "Every sip feels like a million tiny hands caressing my throat," she swung her legs off the table, narrowly missing Erin's head. "Plus, most alcohol tastes like urine."

She set her own glass down, grimacing. "Ok, never thought about it like that, thanks Holtz." 

"Anytime," the music had changed to a slower melody and couples had started to move to the center of the room to slow dance. Holtzmann jumped up suddenly, startling Erin and nearly toppling the table over. She held out her hand and bent at the waist in a low bow. "Care to dance, m'lady." Erin hesitated, she thought about all the people in the room, and what they might think if they saw two women slow dancing together. She realized she had spoken out loud when Holtz rolled her eyes. "They'll think _that's two women slow dancing together_ and then they'll get the hell over it, come on Gilbert." she took Erin's hand, gently leading her out to the center of the dance floor.

She placed Erin's hands on her waist and wrapped her own around her neck, starting to sway them back and forth. Erin was self conscious at first, but when Holtz broke them apart to twirl her around, she let out a laugh of delight. Jillian's eyes were shining when she brought her back against her body, and she rested her head in the crook of her neck, continuing to rock back and forth well out of time with the music.

Erin stepped back this time to twirl Holtz around, but she pulled her back in a little two hard and their bodies collided harshly--hip bone to hip bone, chest to chest. She felt Holtzmann gasp, but not from the pain. Their foreheads were pressed together, and she was looking down at Erin's red lips with a heady gaze. Her eyes eventually tore away from them and met Erin's, they seemed to come to a silent agreement.

Holtz jerked her head and started to pull Erin through the crowd and towards the door, stopping only to grab a champagne flute and down it one big gulp. She slapped it back down on the tray and the waiter holding it looked at her with wide eyes. Holtz ran the back of her hand across her mouth and nodded sharply at the waiter, before tugging on Erin's hand again and leading her out the big double doors. The entryway was mostly empty, but Holtzmann led her up the stairs anyways and through a dimly lit hallway lined with guest rooms. She stopped at the very end of the corridor where the doors ended and a large picture window looked out on a portion of the city.

Erin almost commented on the view, but suddenly Holtz had her pressed up against the lavish wallpaper and crashed her lips against hers. Erin responded immediately, running her fingers through her hair and turning her head to gain better access. Jillian grasped at the material of her dress, careful not to tear it but also not afraid of digging her fingernails into Erin's hip. She let out a whimper and felt Holtz pull back, afraid she had hurt her, but she quickly reassured her by letting her tongue slip in her mouth, earning a low throaty moan from the other woman. She let her hands wander underneath Holtzmann's jacket before grasping at the buttons on the front, undoing them one by one.

Frustratingly, she was wearing a black tank top underneath, but Holtz shrugged off the jacket anyways, letting it fall to the floor. Erin took her bottom lip between her teeth and Jillian nearly growled, grabbing at Erin's leg. She got the dress up high enough to hike her thigh up around her hip, bringing them even closer together. Erin melted against her, one of Holtz's hands was gripped on her bare thigh, and the other one was buried in her hair. She opened her mouth wider and nibbled at Erin's bottom lip before trailing kisses down her neck. She took advantage of her off-the-shoulder dress and left searing marks against her skin, hand trailing higher up Erin's thigh and toying with the hem of her underwear, which seemed to be her favorite way to get Erin to squirm. She let out a whimper and felt Holtz smirk where she was sucking on a stretch of skin on her collarbone.

Erin suddenly took charge, swinging them around so Holtzmann was up against the wall, she took the hand that was on her thigh and pinned it above her head, grabbing the other one that was tangled in her hair to join it.

Holtz's watched in hazy disbelief, chest heaving and hair disheveled, as Erin held her hands above her head and sucked on the spot where her neck met her shoulder. She slumped against the wall, letting the taller woman take her weight. Erin's hands slipped under her tank top, leaving burning trails on her skin where they touched. She moved her head back up to capture her lips in a heavy kiss, and just as she started to move her shirt up farther, a noise sounded behind them.

First a door clicking open, and then a gasp. Erin tore her lips away from Holtz's to look at the person who had just come out of one the rooms. She was probably in her mid to late seventies, white hair in rollers and long bathrobe tucked tight around her. Her mouth hung open, eyes wide and scandalized, and Erin quickly realized the situation they were in. She let Holtz's hands drop and quickly stumbled backwards, Jillian was still out of it, but rolled her shirt back down slowly. Erin grabbed her jacket off the floor and threw it at her, messing up her hair even more then it already was. She imagined she didn't look much better, and tried to smooth her dress down into something presentable.

The lady continued to stare, and Holtz grabbed Erin's hand, leading her around the shocked woman with a salute. They went back down the stairs and into the lobby, where they ran right into Patty and Abby, who looked exhausted. "There you two are! I thought the mayor had taken you guys hostage..." she trailed off when she saw the state of them and Patty grimaced. "Ya'll really?? Here??? You look like you just got done eating dinner." They both looked confused for a second. "What does that mea--OH."

Holtz realized it before Erin did and threw her head back in laughter. Erin glared. "We did not, thank you very much." 

"We did take quite a few years off an elderly woman's life though." Holtz said with a smirk.

"Oh jesus, lets go back inside before you two _actually_ kill someone." 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok ok i'll admit i stole holtzy's outfit from kate herself but i mean can you blame me??? http://cache4.asset-cache.net/gc/546619844-episode-391-pictured-actress-kate-mckinnon-gettyimages.jpg?v=1&c=IWSAsset&k=2&d=X7WJLa88Cweo9HktRLaNXtyuzqfW9ouA%2FI66Vi0OMZoNmRcJZMkfHmJzGRP17lvO 
> 
> (there's gotta be a better way to link in these things lmao)
> 
> btw feel free to send me chapter ideas/headcannons/general holtzbert fluff or just chat w/ me on my tumblr!! safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com


	14. Bloodstream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the gala takes an unexpected dark turn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok ya'll get the tissues out for this one!! once again four am me just can't help herself
> 
> BLOOD AND TRAUMA TW

After nearly two hours of fake smiling and awkwardly accepting dotted out compliments, Erin was ready to get out of this dress and snuggle with a certain blonde engineer for the rest of the night. She spaced out during a random politicians story about how they thought their dog was possessed once (turns out it was just gas) and let her eyes wander around the room. The fancy shamancy guests had started to peter out and the only people left were either very boring or very drunk. The orchestra was playing something that sounded like a lullaby, and the young man at the grand piano in the corner was practically falling asleep at the key's. As she scanned the room, her eyes landed on someone who actually _was_ asleep.

Holtzmann sat slumped over in a chair near the large velvet draped windows, head rested on the table in front of her and hair completely obscuring her face from view--but Erin knew without a doubt she was snoozing away. She shook her head with a smile and turned to tap Patty on the shoulder to point out the sleeping woman, when suddenly a sound like a tear in the universe met her ears. 

And then glass shattering. 

And then screams.

And then she was on the ground and all she could hear was a high pitched ringing. 

Erin tried to sit up, but a weight on her legs stopped her. She pried her eyes open, and they immediately were met with smoke. Looking down at her body though, she could make out a circular shaped object laying on top of her that must have been one of the tables. She tried sitting up again, managing to get most of her torso up.She grabbed at the edge of the table, and with all her strength hauled it off her legs. It fell on top of some debris with a plume of dust and Erin finally was able to get a better look around the room. But now, she'd really wished she hadn't. 

Through the haze of smoke, she could see flames licking up what was left of one of the walls. The one right next to it happened to be the one with the windows, which were now completely shattered. Smoke billowed up throughout the room and every way she turned there was debris and chunks of drywall as well as shattered glass. She could see figures starting to get up through the haze, and quickly scanned for Abby and Patty. She found them a couple feet away, Abby was kicking a table cloth off herself and Patty was propped up against the wall with a nasty gash running down the side of her leg. Either from glass or debris she didn't know, but as soon as she made eye contact with Patty, she waved her off frantically. Erin was confused for a moment until Patty started mouthing something. _Hold up? Hold what..._ The realization hit her like a ton of bricks.

_Holtzmann._

_Oh god. Oh no, oh no, oh no._

She had been right in front of the windows--the ones that were now billowing smoke. She stood up quickly, her already ruined dress ripped up the side as she did so, but she didn't notice. She could only think about one thing right now. 

Erin picked her way across the rubble in the direction of the windows, coughing against the smoke and limping heavily because of one of her broken high heels. Her ears were still ringing, but she tried her voice. " _Jillian_!" it came out weak and distant from what she could tell, but she called out a couple more times and made it over to where the damage looked more severe. She scanned the rubble, looking closely for any signs of Holtz, and almost mistook a shock of blonde hair for a fancy napkin. 

Holtzmann lay on a pile of debris, hair covering her face like she was still sleeping and limbs spread out every direction the way they always were on their mattress back at the firehouse. A portion of one of the velvet drapes had fallen and covered her stomach like a lavish blanket. 

Erin rushed to her side, dropping to her knees next to her and grabbing her face in her hands. "Jillian!" she brushed the hair out of her eyes and was relived to see them cracked open. "Jillian, honey can you hear me?" 

A groan came from the woman below her and she tried to brush off the dust and soot covering her mouth. Holtz's voice came out a breathy whisper and Erin had to lean in close to hear. "Stomach. Bad." she started coughing harshly and Erin furrowed her brow. _Stomach bad?_ She looked lower, and noticed that the curtain on top of her wasn't laying flat, instead piked upwards at an odd angle. She hesitantly pulled the edge of it up and threw it off--and then almost fainted. A large sharp chunk of glass was sticking out of Jillian's left hip, the end coming up at a dangerous point and the other one disappearing beneath flesh and the tattered remains of her jacket. And blood. _Oh god so much blood._

Erin held in a sob--and some vomit--and tore her eyes away to look back at Holtz. Her face was a deathly pale shade and her chest rose and fell in shallow breaths. Erin grasped her cold hand in her's and tried to steady her voice. "Baby, I need you to lie really still ok? Help is coming," she heard sirens in the distance and let out a shaky breath. A crash from a falling wall sconce startled both of them and Jillian's face twisted in pain. A few tears made tracks in the dust that smattered her cheeks and Erin's heart broke.

She did her best to wipe them away and run her fingers through her dirty hair. Her clothes were torn at every angle and minor cuts and scrapes littered her body, and judging by the stinging on her skin, Erin knew she had similar looking ones. 

Cries were coming from all around them and smoke still choked her lungs, but she blocked out every noise and focused on Holtzmann. "Talk to me about something." Next course of action: keep her awake and keep her talking. 

"What?" her voice was weak, but wasn't so quiet that Erin had to lean in close. 

"Talk to me about something, anything." 

Holtz coughed again and grimaced. "Babies?"

"Yes! Sure! Babies, what about them?"

She blinked up at her blearily. "I want some." 

"Oh yeah? How many." 

"Thirteen." Erin would have laughed if they were in any different situation. "Why so many?"

"I want a w-workshop." her voice shook and her eyes started to droop. 

"Hey, hey, stay with me." she took her head between her hands."What would you name one of the babies?" 

Holtz was quiet for so long Erin almost panicked, but then she spoke in a ragged whisper. "Tar."

Erin actually did laugh this time, it hurt her dry throat but it was worth it  because of the way Jillian seemed to perk up. "Tar? Really?"

"It's gender neutral."

Erin noticed how much blood was still leaking out the sides of where the glass was lodged in her hip, and ripped of the end of her tattered dress. "Any other names in mind?" she gently pressed the dark blue fabric around the glass, trying not to let her panic show when the blood immediately soaked through it.

Holtzmann hissed and a couple more tears escaped. Erin wanted desperately to wipe them away, but her blood soaked hands said otherwise. After a couple moments her face relaxed again and she spoke. "Falcon."

Erin tried to ignore the sticky plasma slipping between her fingers. "Falcon and Tar huh?"  
"The dynamic duo." she squeezed her eyes shut tightly. "But their mother would never be on board for those badass names."

"Oh yeah, who's their mom?"

It was hard to tell through the smoke but it looked like Holtz made an incredulous face. "You of course." 

Erin's stomach flip flopped, and not from the blood. "You think _I'm_ going to carry thirteen babies?" 

Holtz did the tiniest of shrugs. "We can adopt."

Erin heard the sirens getting closer and wondered what the hell was taking so long. Holtzmann's head started lolling and she spoke louder. "Where would we live Jill?" 

"Mmmm," her eyes struggled to find Erin's. "An abandoned roller rink."

"Interesting choice. Why there?" the sirens sounded right outside now and Erin breathed a sigh of relief. 

Holtz finally met her eyes and stared blankly, either from blood loss or because she thought Erin's question was ridiculous, she couldn't tell.

"So we can roller skate."

"Fair point."

* * *

 

The next hour was a blur. Firefighters and EMT'S ran about the ballroom, and Holtzmann was quickly rushed to the hospital in an ambulance. Erin found Abby and Patty in the chaos and Patty was being loaded into a separate one because of her leg. She started to say she'd ride along with them but Abby waved her off and told her to stay with Holtz, Patty agreeing from the stretcher. "Make sure our baby girl's safe, alright Erin?"

She hopped in the back of the ambulance at the last second and sat by Jillian's side, continuing to distract her with questions when they'd hit a bump in the road or swing around a corner sharply. 

("Would we have any pets in our roller rink?" "Of course, twenty seven dogs at _least._ ")

Now as she sat in the ER waiting room with Abby, reality started to sink in. 

Jillian almost died. Jillian could be dying right now. But none of the nurses will tell her anything and her dress is stained with blood and the coffee in her hands is cold and the florescent lights overhead are too bright and--"Hey, you ok?"

Abby was looking at her with a concerned gaze, and she realized her hands were shaking and her breath was speeding up and coffee was sloshing onto her already ruined dress.

"Y-yeah, I'm fine." Abby's face softened and she took the cold cup and set it on the end table next to them, taking one of Erin's trembling hands. "She's going to be ok. Holtz is the toughest person I know." Erin nodded numbly, picking dried blood out from under her fingernails. "I know she is...but there was so much blood and...her face was so pale and--" her voice broke off as hot tears started to well up in her eyes.

"Oh Erin." Abby put her arm around her, and Erin let all the fear and guilt out onto her shoulder. "I-f I hadn't made her go to that s-stupid party maybe..." she spoke through her tears, throat still raw and painful from the smoke inhalation. Abby shushed her, rubbing up and down her arm. "None of this was your fault Erin, it was the...gas leak." That's what were told had caused the explosion, but no one seemed to fully believe it. 

Erin suddenly remember something. "Oh my god, where's Kevin?" 

Abby furrowed her brow. "He said he was getting a ride here with someone...Metal?"

"Steel?"

Abby nodded. "Yeah that was it." 

Erin buried her face in her hands, her voice coming out muffled. "Go call him right now, or we're never seeing him again." 

Abby looked confused but pulled her phone out of her clutch that was covered in soot marks. "Darn it, no signal," she looked down at Erin with a sigh. "Hang tight, I'll be back."

Once Abby was gone, Erin raised her head to look around the waiting room. A couple people from the gala were scattered around, looking just as banged up and tired as she was. A clock on the wall ticked slowly, and a television mounted in the corner played some infomercial on mute. She read the time.

**_2:32 AM._ **

She rubbed her face with a sigh, hands coming back covered in dust and a little bit of blood. She hadn't even noticed the large scratch that ran down her temple until a nurse had asked if she wanted it looked at, but she declined. The pain kept her body from going completely numb.

Abby walked back in, surprisingly with Kevin in tow. He hadn't been injured in the ordeal because he'd been in the kitchen at the time, watching how the "Horse Divorce's" were made. He waved with a grin when he saw Erin and plopped down in the seat next to her. Abby stood above him with crossed arms. "Apparently, Kev and his friend Steel made a pit stop to get sandwiches on the way here." 

Kevin leaned back in the chair. "'Not just sandwiches! I also stopped at headquarters to get you some clothes Erin," he dropped a plastic bag into her lap. "That dress looked supes uncomfortable, so I just grabbed what was off the floor in you and Holtz's roo-" Abby cut him off with a glare. Erin pulled out what was inside the bag and could feel tears start in her eyes again. It was the X-Files shirt that had originally been Holtzmann's, but had become Erin's soon after she moved in.

Kevin read her facial expression and panicked. "Oh no, is that a bad shirt? Do you need me to call Steel and get you another one because I'm sure he'd be more than happy-"Erin cut him off by throwing her arms around his broad shoulders and Abby raised her eyebrows. "Aww," Kevin responded immediately, wrapping her large arms around her and grinning widely. "I wish Patty and Holtz were here so we could have another Buster group hug." 

Abby shook her head. "Hey Kev, why don't you stop suffocating Erin and come with me to check on Patty, k' bud?"   
She eventually pried him off Erin, leading him down a hallway to where Patty was getting stitches on her leg. 

Erin changed in the sterile bathroom, pulling on the sweatpants Kevin had brought as well as the shirt. She nearly collapsed on the cold tile when Holtz's smell enveloped her.Erin had been the one wearing it most often, but her scent still clung to it somehow. She looked at her tattered and blood stained dress with a sigh, and wadded up as best she could before shoving it in the trash can. 

She did _not_ want to own a reminder of this night.

She went back to the waiting room, curling up in the uncomfortable floral patterned chair and laying her head on her knees. It was hard to believe just a few hours ago, her and Holtz were sneaking off to makeout like teenagers. And now, she didn't even know if she'd ever see her again. 

_Oh god._ fear choked at her stomach. _Don't think about that, don't think about that._

Instead, she thought about Holtz's dimples and her hair flopping around when she dances and her glasses hanging off one ear and the way her nose scrunches when she laughs and the look she gets in her eyes after she kisses Erin and--she was cut off from her thoughts when a woman a little older then her in a white doctors coat walked in, scanning the room. She tried not to get her hopes up, many doctors had been coming in and out and talking to seemingly everyone but her. 

"Holtzmann?" her stomach dropped."Is anyone here for Jillian Holtzmann?" 

She shot out of her chair, startling the poor doctor. "Me, I am!" the woman walked over to her with a clipboard in hand. "Are you family?" 

Erin didn't hesitate. "Yes."

"Relation?" 

She paused on that one before answering. "Girlfriend."

The doctor raised an eyebrow before scanning the room again. Upon seeing that no one else was here for her, she shrugged. "Good enough for me," she tucked her clipboard under her arm. "The glass in her abdomen was fairly deep, but we managed to get it out without causing any further damage." Erin breathed a sigh of relief. "It's a wonder it didn't tear a portion of her intestines, the way it was positioned." Erin rubbed her hands together anxiously, waiting to ask the one question she's been asking the nurses for the past two hours. "Her blood loss was significant, but it's a good thing you didn't try and remove the shard or it would have been infinitely more worse had you have." 

"CanIseeher?!" Erin couldn't help the words that tumbled out and the doctor smiled. "Yes, she's in recovery. I'll have a nurse take you." she flagged down a passing woman in pink puppy printed scrubs and said a few words. The nurse nodded and gently smiled at Erin. "Follow me."

The nurse lead her down a series of hallways, passing room after room until finally stopping in front of pair of large double doors. "Last room on the left." the nurse gave her one last parting smile and Erin hurriedly pushed through the doors, nearly smacking her head, and found another hallway of rooms. The walk down it felt like two thousand years, but it was probably only 60 seconds. She skidded to a halt in front of the last door and inhaled before turning the knob. 

Stepping inside, she didn't know what she expected to see. Maybe Holtz hooked up to five thousand machines, with breathing tubes and doctors scurrying around frantically. But the room was quiet and the only person in it was laying on a bed, wearing a hospital gown and hooked up to an IV. When she heard the door open, her blue eyes locked with Erin's. 

Erin didn't remember moving, but suddenly she was right next to the bed, grasping Jillian's hand and brushing hair off her forehead. "Hey," she said through a watery smile. 

Holtz smiled slowly. "Hey yourself." 

Erin nearly collapsed on top of her when she heard her voice, but seeing as she was probably heavily bandaged under the blanket, she opted for bringing her hand up and pressing a kiss to her knuckles. 

"How do you feel?" she asked, lowering her hand back down on the bed.

"Like I got put into the ghost blender." Erin started laughing, causing Holtz to smile wider. But soon, Erin's hysterical laughing turned to hysterical crying.

Holtzmann's eyebrows furrowed and she scooched over on her bed with a wince, pulling back the covers for her. Erin carefully slid in next to her, placing her head in the crook of her neck with a sniffle. She felt Holtz press a kiss to the top of her head and more tears escaped. She buried her face in her hair, expecting it to smell like the hospital, instead it just smelled like a bonfire. 

"What's the matter?" her voice came out scratchy like Erin's. 

"You can't do that to me." 

"Do what?"

Erin lifted her head to look at Holtz, their faces were mere inches apart. "Y-you can't leave me...I n-need--"her voice broke and Jillian pressed her forehead against Erin's. 

"Hey," she said gently. "I'm right here baby." 

She could see tears forming in the other woman's eyes, which just made her cry more. 

Erin leaned forward, capturing her lips in a desperate kiss. All her fear and worry that was built up during these past couple hours came pouring out and she knew Holtz could feel it by the way she kissed back so firmly. Almost saying _I know. I'm sorry. I'm here._

She shakily pulled back to see Jillian crying for the second time that night. She reached up and brushed one of Erin's own tears away, before running her fingers through her tangled hair. 

They pressed their foreheads together, staying there and listening to each others breathing for a minute before Erin spoke. "I'm sorry, I should be the one comforting you right now." 

Holtz shook her head with a gentle smile. "I should be apologizing to you for getting stabbed."

"You kind of couldn't help that though." 

Holtzmann grabbed the back of her neck, pulling her down so her head rested on her chest, and Erin knew immediately why she did it--so she could hear the steady beat of her heart loud and clear.

Erin squeezed her eyes shut, trying to prevent any more pesky tears from coming out. She ran her hand down Holtz's arm and threaded their fingers together, before slowly lifting her head to look at Jillian.

She had been wanting to say this for a long time, but at this moment it felt like it _needed_ to be said. 

"I love you."

Holtzmann didn't react for a moment, instead she stared at Erin with a look she couldn't identify. 

Then she leaned forward, and kissed her so passionately Erin was glad they were inside a hospital. The kiss was slow, methodical almost. Jillian was drinking in every ounce of Erin with everything she had. When she finally pulled away, her cheeks were flushed and she was giving Erin that look again. 

Two seconds later, Erin would figure out what that look was.

"I love you too."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm a little hesitant about this chapter so let me know how i did in the comments!!! also feel free to come cry to me at safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com
> 
> (also another virtual lesbian salute™ for whoever can guess what song the chapter title is from)


	15. Stitches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> erin is the biggest nesting mother hen and holtz is going stir crazy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok i will admit this is a biiiit of a filler chapter(maybe that's why it took me three days to write lmao) but the next few chapters are going to be WILD just you wait!!

Three days had passed since Holtzmann had been discharged from the hospital, though it felt like she hadn't left by the way Erin was coddling her so heavily.

She'd scurry around their room, picking up clothes and sweeping the floor and moving the flowers from Patty up on the dresser, only to change her mind two seconds later and put them in the window sill. ("Erin honey, that's too much direct sunligh--"THEY LOOK NICE THERE.")

Kevin's "Get well soon!" smiley face balloon bobbed against the ceiling, and Erin looked up at it with an adorable pouty face. She tried jumping to reach the end of it, immediately coming up short. Holtzmann held in a snicker, partially because it still hurt to laugh and partially because she didn't want to upset her already irked girlfriend. Erin set her jaw and breezed out of the room, coming back in two seconds later holding a stool from the lab. She positioned it below the balloon and cautiously put a foot up. The stool wobbled under her weight, but she still reached for the string dangling just above her head.

"Erin please be careful."

"I've got it." she spoke through clenched teeth.

Holtzmann squeezed her eyes shut, and a moment later she heard a cry of victory. Erin was stepping down from the stool, balloon in hand with a triumphant grin. She knotted the end of the string about five times on to one of the stools rungs. "You're not getting away from me again bucko." she muttered.

Erin stepped back and brushed her hands together, blowing a strand of hair that had fallen into her eyes away with a huff. She turned back to Holtz, coming up to the edge of the bed and starting to rearrange the pillows behind her back for probably the hundredth time.

Holtzmann reached out to stop her fidgeting hands. "Hey, hey," she turned Erin's head to meet her eyes. "I'm ok, the pillows are fine."

Erin let out a breath through her teeth. "They're flat. You can't be comfortable on flat pillows, Jillian."

Holtz gave her a look. She only called her by her first name in an endearing way, or when she was very frustrated. "Erin, let it go."

She stuck out her bottom lip in a pout, and Holtz melted. "C'mere," she pulled Erin over to the side of her that wasn't sliced up, and tucked her under the covers. Erin laid her head down on Holtzmann's chest with a sigh. Lately, the only time Erin seemed to relax was when she could hear Jillian's heartbeat--which was understandable, and also the cutest thing in the world in Holtz's eyes.

"I'm sorry." Erin's voice came muffled from where it was buried in her shirt.

"For what?"

"For being a mom the past week."

Holtz smiled and rested her chin on her head. "Someone's gotta do it."

Erin sighed again. "I know but, I don't want you to think of your girlfriend as your mom."

Holtz's chest shook with her laughter. "Trust me," she lifted Erin's head to look at her. "I see you as my daddy more than anything."

Erin furrowed her brow. "Wha--" when she realized, she swatted at Holtz's arm lightly. "Shut up."

"No."

Jillian leaned down to captured her lips in deep kiss. These were becoming more and more frequent, and neither of them were complaining.

But, that also came with interruptions.

"Hey guys--oh jeez sorry I'll come back." Abby was covering her eyes and blindly feeling around for the tarp to leave.

They broke apart and Holtz grinned. "Abby do you really think we'd be doing anything more than kissing with this." she gestured to her side. 

Abby peaked through her fingers and raised an eyebrow. "I wouldn't be surprised if you found a way."

Erin rolled her eyes. "Did you need something Abs?"

She let her hand drop and Erin noticed the other one was held behind her. "Oh yeah! I dropped by Patty's on the way here and she got a gift for you Holtz." she revealed what was behind her back.

Holtzmann's eyes widened and she started making a noise Erin had never heard her make before. "Yes!" she reached out for the object with grabby fingers. "Yeeees!"

It was a sleek black cane with a dangerously curved ivory handle, like some mob boss's personal walking stick.

Abby handed it to Holtz, who was now grinning widely, looking from the cane and back up to Erin as if saying _Do you see this? Erin can you see this?_

Erin was pretty sure everyone in New York could see it.

"I gotta make Patty a snazzy pair of crutches now, maybe I could attach an engine of some sort..." Erin stopped her with a pointed finger. "No lab for you yet, remember?"

Holtz made a face. "Alrrright."

She spun the cane in her hands. "Can I at least try this out?" she raised an eyebrow at Erin.

"...Fine." she caved.

At that moment, a crash came from downstairs, and then a voice. "ABBBYYYYY, HOW DO I MAKE SOUP IN THE OVEN? IT KEEPS EXPLODING." Abby sighed. "I better go check on that."she gave Holtz a look. "You be careful." she patted her leg and Holtzmann saluted. "Yes ma'am."

After Abby had gone, Erin stood in front of Holtz and held out her hands. "Ok, stand up _very_ slowly--" suddenly, Holtzmann was grabbing Erin's hands and hauling herself up the _opposite_ of slowly.

"Jillian! You could tear your stitches!"

Holtz smiled. "It'd be worth it if I get to use my new cane."

Erin took it off the bed and handed it to her with a sigh of defeat. "Be free."

Holtzmann grabbed it with a wild look in her eyes and let go of Erin's hand. She started hobbling around the room at a pace much faster than was probably safe, but her grin was so big Erin couldn't help the one that spread across her own face.

"I can't wait to pull a Willy Wonka on every person I see on the street."

"Jill, Willy Wonka didn't actually _need_ the cane. If you tried to do a somersault now you'd faint or throw up," she paused "or both."

"Wanna bet?" she started leaning forward. "Holtz no!" Erin rushed to her side and stopped her from face planting.

Holtz had a smirk on her face but there was a bead of sweat on her forehead, and her skin was turning a sickly pale. "See! You're still weak!"

Holtz waved her off. "I'm just hungry, would you get me some of Kevin's exploding oven soup?"

Erin sighed. "Only if you lay back down, and promise to stay down!"

Holtzmann let Erin lead her back to the bed and tuck the covers over her legs. She gave her a wide cheesy grin and Erin shook her head. "I'll be right back, stay put."

Holtzmann saluted her. "Yes sir."

* * *

 

Kevin's oven soup was not exactly _edible_ per say, so Erin opted for a grilled cheese. She walked back up the stairs, bypassing the lab and breezing through the tarp. "There wasn't enough oven soup to gather from the floor so I got you--" she stopped short. The sheets on the bed were messy and more importantly there wasn't a person in them.

Erin panicked. She set the plate on the ground and dashed back outside, the bathroom light was off and the door was open. "Jillian!" She scanned the mess that was the lab, her eyes trailing over metal and machinery and a tuft of blonde hair and--wait.

"Holtz! I can see you."

She rose slowly from behind the table, eyes wide like a deer caught in the headlights.

"Were you even hungry? Was this just a grand scheme to get rid of me so you could get back in here?"

"Abby brought me a sandwich earlier."

"What, when? I've been up here all day!"

"Yes, nesting so violently that a ghost could have walked right in and stolen me away without you noticing." Erin started to protest. "I ate the whole sandwich in front of you. We made eye contact. Multiple times."

She rubbed her hands over her eyes with a groan. Holtzmann sat down in the office chair with a wince, before rolling over to come to a stop in front of Erin.She grabbed at her waist, gently pulling her down onto the leg on her good side. Erin pressed her forehead to Holtz's temple. "Why am I taking this worse then you are?" she muttered.

"Because you're you." she pressed a kiss to Erin's collarbone.

"Why do I have to be me? Why can't I be worry free and relaxed Erin Gilbert?"

"Well you wouldn't be the Erin Gilbert I love now would you?"

Erin's heart flipped. It wasn't like they hadn't said 'I love you' since that night in the hospital--Erin had been making sure she tells Holtz every night before they go to sleep--but still hearing her say it made Erin's body heat up.

Holtzmann brushed Erin's hair back, peppering kisses up the side of her neck and jaw. She reached her ear and whispered something low. "I'm sorry but that grilled cheese has been staring at me for the past minute can I please--" "Go ahead."

* * *

 

The next couple days went quite the same, Erin fussing over every little thing and Holtz looking on with an amused grin. Patty stopped by, still out of commission because of her leg, and Holtzmann nearly teared a stich with the force of her hug. Patty's crutches were bedazzled with rhinestones and Erin could see the gears turning in Holtz's head when she got a look at them. ("No." "But I just want to add a little--" "No.") she eventually let it go with a huff.

Holtz was more mobile now, she could walk down the stairs without assistance--despite Erin's complaints--and was also starting to work on stuff in the lab again--despite Erin's many _many_ complaints.

Almost two weeks since that fateful day--and Erin's nightmares had started up again. They were worse now though, after seeing Holtzmann injured and bleeding and almost _dying_ the nightmares had taken advantage of that.

Almost every night, there was a new horrific one, and almost every night Jillian would hold a shaking Erin in her arms, and whisper reassurances into her skin. _I'm here. We're safe. I'm not going anywhere. I love you._

But still, she couldn't get the images of Holtz laying in the rubble and barely breathing out of her head.

Holtzmann's disregard for the situation worried Erin. She tried to act like nothing happened, like it was just a scrape and there was nothing to get worked up about--either for herself or for Erin, she couldn't tell.

So the way Erin found Holtz that evening was a bit surprising.

She was standing in front of the full length mirror propped against their wall, with her shirt pulled up around her waist and a pout on her lips. The jagged mark on her left hip was angry and red, cutting an almost lighting bolt shape down her abdomen, and Erin couldn't help the way her stomach turned at the sight of it. Holtz met her eyes in the mirror and immediately dropped her shirt. Erin walked up behind her, slipping her hands around her waist to lift it back up again.

"I think it looks pretty badass."

Holtzmann shrugged. "I guess," her voice came out quiet. "It's just...new."

Erin was about to go on about how _amazing_ it'd look if she wore a bikini, but then she raised her head to look at Jillian. Her blue eyes looked watery, and her lower lip was trembling in a way Erin knew meant she was either about to punch someone or start bawling. Luckily or unluckily, it was the latter. She shifted in Erin's arms, turning around to bury her face in her hair and wrap her arms around her neck.

Erin's heart shattered. She had only ever seen Holtzmann shed a few tears that night in the ballroom, and later in the hospital, but it was nothing compared to this. Her entire body trembled, and it wasn't until she let the first sob out that Erin was shocked out of her stupor. Wrapping her arms around the smaller woman, she held on tight to her waist and felt hot tears wet her shoulder.

After a full minute of Erin rocking them back and forth and rubbing circles on Holtz's back, she finally spoke.

"Jill, hey,"she pressed a kiss to her temple."What's the matter, baby?"

Holtzmann sniffled against her neck. "Nothing." her voice came out a muffled and raspy whisper.

Erin pulled her head up, and Holtz's eyes were red and bloodshot, tears running tracks down her cheeks. "It's not nothing."

Holtz shrugged again, brushing away stray tears with the back of her hand. "I just feel..."she struggled for a moment. "Different."

Erin tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "That's normal, you've been through a lot." she said softly.

Holtzmann suddenly set her shoulders, staring off at something behind Erin's head. "I know what we need to do."

"Wha--" Holtz was already out of Erin's arms, and striding across the room to their dresser. She pulled a duffel bag from under it ( _since when has that been there?_ ) and yanked open Erin's drawer, tossing her clothes into the bag with a fierce determination.

"Holtz! What are you doing?"

"More like what are _we_ doing."

"Ok, what are _we_ doing?"

Holtzmann glanced over her shoulder at Erin with a whisper of a smirk. "Roadtrip."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i can't promise an update until the weekend but who knows with me ya'll there might be one sooner so keep checking back!! 
> 
> meanwhile come give me cute holtzbert headcanons on my tumblr: safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com


	16. Pringles and Potato Pancakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> will holtz and erin ever stop scarring elderly people?? stay tuned to find out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im soooooo sorry for the week long hiatus ya'll. i met fifth harmony on thursday and the days leading up to it were just me, screaming, literally doing nothing else but screaming. but finally the first installment of holtzbert!roadtrip!!

Erin stared blankly as Holtzmann shuffled to-and-fro around the room, shoveling various things into the already over sized duffel bag. 

"Roadtrip? Where? How? When? What about mhpff--"her ramblings were cut off by Holtz slapping a hand on her mouth. 

"Shut your beautiful, beautiful pie hole and trust me." her eyes were still rimmed red but there was a glint of something in them Erin hadn't seen since the accident.

"Ok,"she relented."but if an army of ghosts wipes out New York while we're gone, I'm suing you and your cat!" 

Holtz scoffed. "Like Maurice wouldn't have a lawyer," she breezed past Erin and out of their room, the green tarp billowing out behind her. She came back a minute later with Erin's toiletries--as well as her own--clutched in her arms. "Hey wait, Jill you have to bag those--" Holtzmann was already dumping them on top of the clothes she had shoved in the larger-than-life duffel bag. She zipped it up defiantly and started to heave it over her shoulder when Erin finally stepped in.

"Uh, uh, uh, no heavy lifting for you yet, remember?" she took the bag off Holtz's shoulder and let it drop to the floor. 

Holtzmann looked irritated. "I'm fine," That seemed to be a common phrase in her vocabulary lately. "I'm not going to brake."

Erin sighed. "I know that,"she threaded her fingers through Holtz's. "But don't you think this is a little rushed? We haven't planned anything and you won't even tell me where we're going!" 

Holtzmann breathed out a sigh of her own, schooling her features. "Can you please just trust me," she squeezed Erin's hands."I...I just need this." her voice broke. 

Erin puffed out a breath between her lips. "Ok, if it makes you happy...I will go into this blind,"the words seemed to hurt her coming out. "I will not book any hotels in advance nor will I have a carefully well thought out plan of our route, with each rest stop marked for maximum peeing efficiency--" she was cut off by an abrupt kiss pressed to her lips. Holtz had grabbed her face in both hands and kissed her with a desperation that was becoming more and more common these days. She pulled back breathless, and gazed at Erin in adoration. "I love you."

Erin melted, momentarily forgetting her rambling. "I love you too." Holtz pressed another quick kiss to her lips and lifted up the handle of the duffel bag. "You gonna help me with this?"

* * *

 

After convincing Abby that they wouldn't be leaving forever ("We make no promises." "Holtz!") and making sure she tell Patty what was going on, they were off. Luckily, work had been slow lately and it seemed like as the summer wound down so did the ghosts. Not to mention with Patty's leg and Holtz's stomach still healing, heaving two thousand pound proton packs around had been out of the question for awhile.

Erin reluctantly handed the keys to her car over to Holtz. "Please...don't take me to foam henge." Holtzmann winked and jingled the keys. "We'll see where the night takes us." 

They stopped at a gas station to get snacks and drinks for the road and Erin had to practically wrestle five Pringle cans out of Holtz's arms. 

"You do not need this much salt!" 

"How else do you expect me to function Erin, huh? Do you think Albert Einstein developed the theory of relativity without a can of these bad boy's?" 

"Pringles didn't exist in the eighteen hundred's Holtz."

"Yes they did, Albert kept a private stash all to himself, that's why everyone else back then was so stupid."

"Marie Curie?" 

"You think Albert cooked up these suckers all on his own? She was the chemist behind every ounce of crunchy goodness."

The woman behind the counter watched them bicker back and forth like a tennis match. Finally, Erin got the five cans down to three with a lot of bribery. ("I won't wear pants to bed for a month." "Deal.")

By the time they got out on the road, the sun was low on the horizon, casting rays of warm light onto Holtzmann's hands where they were resting on the steering wheel. Her fingers drummed along to an uplifting song that played out of the radio. Erin had her feet propped up on the dashboard and was working on a piece of cherry red licorice clutched between her fingers like a ciggarette. The heat had mellowed with the sun and fresh air blew in through the cracked windows as towering sky scrapers gave way to green trees that streaked by at lightning speed. 

"Soooo, can you tell me where we're going now?"

"Nope."

"Please! I can be your navigator, I'm great with maps." 

"Erin," Holtz flashed her a look.

She resigned with a sigh. "Yes yes I know, trust you."

"Thatta girl."

* * *

 

An hour or so later, the sun had set, giving way to stars that twinkled on an inky sky. Erin knew at this point they were in Pennsylvania, but she wasn't sure where until they drove past a sign that read: **_Welcome to the borough of Doylestown!_**

They drove through what must have been downtown, though no buildings seemed to reach above three stories. Quaint shops lined the streets and historic architecture spiraled on every corner. It was barely September but the town must have forgotten, as miniature pumpkins sat on stoops and the smell of various autumn scented potpourri wafted in through the windows. Warm light glowed out of many of the shop doors and quite a few people were strolling down the sidewalk at a pace that would have gotten them trampled and killed in New York.

Erin inhaled for a moment, taking in the sweet smelling air. She had nearly forgotten what clean non-polluted-and-urine-scented oxygen felt like.

Holtz kept going further, past the shops and toward a small park on the edge of town. She parked the car and turned off the engine, she started to open her door but Erin stopped her. "Wait, are we here? Is this it?"

"Oh no no no, this is not the final destination," she breathed a sigh of relief. "but there's something here I've wanted to see for awhile." she hopped out of the car, leaving Erin with no choice but to follow after her. They walked across the grass--well Erin walked, Holtz almost skipped. She skidded to a halt in front of something Erin couldn't really get a good look at in the dark, but Holtzmann's grin when she turned to face Erin practically lit up the entire town.

"Look, lookit," she gestured wildly behind her. Erin came closer, she looked past her and tried to act surprised. "Wow! It's a statue of..."

"Ronald Reagan."

"Yup, yup that is Ronald." she said. "Is that Nancy with him--"

"Nope, that's Jennie Gowaty."

"Oh of course." she stepped closer, eyeing the dark figures seated at what looked to be a picnic table. "What's ol' Ronnie doing there?" 

"He's eating an invisible potato pancake." Holtz stated excitedly.

"Why is it invisible?"

"Oh, they thought the potato pancake would block Ronald's face, so they didn't put it in his fingers." the statue sat smiling, with a hand raised and an empty space between it's two fingers where a potato pancake should be. 

"Where did you find out about this babe?" Erin said hesitantly. 

"On website a couple years ago, listing fun roadside attractions. The title of this one really drew me in: ' _Ronald Reagan Eats Invisible Potato Pancake._ '"

Holtzmann was suddenly shoving her phone into Erin's hand. She ran over next to the statue and threw an arm around Ronald's bronze shoulders. "Get a pic of us." she threw a thumbs up with her other hand and plastered a wide goofy grin on her face. Erin couldn't help but feel all warm at her girlfriends giddiness, especially because she hadn't really been herself these past few weeks.

Erin snapped the picture. The flash cast a ghastly light on the three figures and she almost expected Ronald and the other woman to stand up and chase them around as possessed potato pancake eating ghosts. 

Holtzmann ran back to Erin's side and snagged the phone, she pulled up the picture with a cackle. "Yes! This is going on the fridge." the picture was grainy, but you could clearly see the manic look in Holtz's flashed filled eyes, and everything beyond the light was in complete pitch darkness. 

Erin personally thought it was most terrifying thing she'd ever seen--and that includes the giant cartoon ghost that ripped across New York and nearly wiped out the whole planet--but she smiled for Holtz's benefit anyways. "You guys look like old friends." 

"Damn right we do, boy how I'd love to share a potato pancake with Ronald Reagan."

Erin couldn't help but place a kiss on her dimpled cheek. "You're cute when you're being a weirdo."

Holtz raised an eyebrow. "So I'm always cute?"

"Yes that's what I said."

It was hard to tell in the dim light, but Erin was glad that she could still make her girlfriend blush. She tugged on Jillian's arm. "Let's go, before Ronald hurls his invisible potato pancake at us."

* * *

 

They got back on the road very briefly, when Erin noticed Holtz's eyes glazing over. Her own had been trying to shut for the past couple minutes, so she convinced Holtzmann to stop somewhere for the night. 

After a brief google search, they found a highly rated and highly priced inn a couple minutes away. It seems after the incident the mayor had been more open to giving the Ghostbusters all the money they needed, so thankfully cash would not be a problem.

They drove up a long winding driveway to a 18th century farmhouse with rustic red shutters and a white columned porch. Three similar looking buildings surrounded it on each side and light poured out of a few of the windows,casting a warm glow on the neatly manicured lawn.

"Yes please." Holtz muttered under her breath. 

After lugging the giant duffel bag out of the trunk, they trekked up the stairs and swung open the red door. The inside decor was what was expected from the outside. Floral prints covered every pillow surface and the carved wood couches sat atop plush oriental rugs. A large fireplace was flickering in what looked to be the main lobby, and an older woman sat behind an ornate wooden desk. She had grey hair twisted into a knot on the top of her head, and a crochet shawl was draped around her slouched shoulders. She was knitting at lightning speed, and intently focused on her two blurring needles. 

"Did we just enter this elderly woman's wet dream." Erin nudged Holtz sharply with her elbow. 

The woman jumped when Holtzmann spoke and halted her intense knitting. She set the needles down next to her and gave them a kind smile. "Hello, can I help you ladies?" 

Holtz strutted forward and slapped a wad of cash down on the counter. "We'd like a bed to lay unconscious in for a couple of hours."

The lady looked startled for a moment, but quickly schooled her features back into a smile. "Of course, last name?"

Erin quickly cut in. "Oh, we don't have a reservation."

"That's quite alright, we'll get you two girls set up in a room in no time," she started typing something into the slim laptop in front of her. "Looks like all we have left is a suite, are you ok with sharing a bed?"

The two shared a look. "Won't be a problem." 

"Good,"she grabbed two keys off the hook behind her and laid them on the counter. "I'd imagine you're close enough friends if you're traveling together."

Erin stiffened, but Holtz casually threw an arm around her shoulders. "The closest."

The woman went back to typing. "Which last name would you like me to put down?"

"Florken, we have the same last name." Erin's eyes widened, Holtz waved her off. 

"Oh, are you sisters then?"

Holtz laughed, and Erin forced out a nervous chuckle. "Oh no no no no, we're married."

Erin's face and the old woman's we're practically identical looks of shock--for very different reasons. 

Holtzmann pulled her into her side. "Yup, this here is my wife, Shelly."

Erin's shock was interrupted by annoyance. "Kelly, _sweetheart_ , you don't need to tell this nice woman of our affairs."

Holtz pressed her lips together, out of irritation or an effort not to smile, Erin couldn't tell. "But _babycakes_ , I just can't help but proclaim my undying love to you whenever I get the chance." 

The woman blinked slowly. 

"My sweet cuddle bunches of oats, I feel the same way!" Erin felt a sharp pinch on her butt, failing to notice Holtz's hand move down there. She gritted her teeth through a plastered smile. "I just can't get enough of this delectable little creampuff." 

Jillian kept up her straight face. "You see that, I'm just food to her!" she wiggled her eyebrows up and down at the woman. "If you know what I'm saying." 

Erin was two seconds away from pushing her down onto one of these old ass couches and _really_ giving this poor woman a show. She was pulled out of her dream when Holtz tugged sharply on her waist. "We better get upstairs before we ruin one of your nice rugs," ( _so Holtz was thinking floor, interesting._ ) "Thank you ma'am." she saluted the still wide eyed woman and pulled Erin up a dark winding staircase. 

They walked briskly down a dimly lit hallway and came to a stop at their room, Holtz's hands were shaking so bad she could barely fit the key in. Not even bothering to turn on the lights, she threw the duffel bag into the dark room and slammed the door shut behind Erin, pressing her hard against it. She grabbed her wrists and pinned them above her head, leaning in close. Erin got to her lips first, eagerly taking her bottom lip between her teeth and tugging. Holtzmann let out a low moan and responded instantly, pressing her hip bones against Erin's and opening her mouth eagerly. She was two seconds from tearing her shirt off when a click sounded behind them. Suddenly the room was filled with a dim light and the two women pulled apart with a gasp.

Apparently, there was a reason modern key cards existed.

An old couple sat up in the antique bed, both wearing similar expressions of shock on their faces. Holtz was expecting Erin to bolt like she usually did, but instead she pressed her face onto Jillian's chest, body shaking with laughter. Holtz couldn't help the smile that spread on her own face as she saluted the scarred elderly couple.

"Sweet dreams."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> disclaimer: i have never been to doylestown pennsylvania and my descriptions are based solely on scarce google images. (the ronald reagan statue is a real thing) (please look it up it's beautiful) 
> 
> go bug me 2 write over on my tumblr: safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com


	17. Just As Our Founding Fathers Intended

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> erin's always ready to fight and holtz just wants to eat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok i promise the next chapter will be longer and hopefully more interesting!! i was happy with this chapter when i wrote it last night but looking back on it today i'm kinda like ehhh so let me know what you think!
> 
> WARNING: HOMOPHOBIA AND IDIOTIC PPL PRESENT IN THIS CHAPTER it's a small portion but if it makes you uncomfortable please skip over babes!!!

**_6:32 A.M_ **

The clock ticked slowly on the decorative wallpaper as Erin rolled over to tap the peacefully sleeping woman next to her on the nose. A low groan came from beneath a mop of blonde hair. Holtzmann turned on her side, facing away from Erin. She tried again, this time trailing her fingers up and down her back. 

No response. 

She went for a different tactic. Erin leaned over, brushing the loose hair that had come undone in the night off of Holtz's neck and placing a lingering kiss to the skin there. A sharp inhalation of breath came in response. Erin smirked, leaning over and pressing another searing kiss on the side of her jaw. Holtzmann suddenly rolled towards her, their faces mere inches apart. "My love, it is the ass crack of dawn." her voice was raspy with sleep, but her blue eyes were wide open and twinkling. 

"Yes." Erin said certainly.

"Why?"

"Because."

Holtzmann sighed, throwing the covers off her body and sitting up. Erin had a brief moment of victory, thinking she had won, but then Holtz was walking over to her side of the bed and pushing on her shoulders. 

"What are you--omfffh." Holtz had given a hard shove and suddenly she was laying in the middle of the bed on her stomach. Holtzmann grabbed on end of the tacky white and blue floral comforter, and tucked it around Erin's side. She climbed up beside her and gave her body another shove, effectively turning her on her back. 

"Jillian, what the _hell_ are you doing?!" 

"Making a breakfast burrito."

"Don't you dare--" she was cut off by Holtz shoving her onto her stomach again, mouth muffled by the moth ball smelling sheets beneath her. Holtzmann continued to roll her up in the blanket until she was on the other side of the bed, head and feet the only visible parts of her body sticking out of the burrito. 

"Oh you are so going to pay for this!" said Erin angrily. She tried moving her arms, but she was wrapped so tightly she probably looked like a giant wiggling worm. Holtz brushed off her hands and laid beside her, curling up in a fetal position and closing her eyes. "In the morning."

"It _is_ the morning Jillian!"

Silence.

Erin puffed out an angry breath, squirming in her blanket trap. She instantly got an idea--a possibly dangerous one at that. She braced her body, pulling it as hard as she could to one side, and then launching it with all her might towards Jillian. They collided hard, and the force of her movement caused Holtz to get shoved completely off the bed and onto the dark hardwood floor underneath them. Erin panicked, de-tangling herself from the blanket and peering over the edge of the bed with wide eyes. 

Holtzmann lay flat on her back on the floor, and her body was shaking uncontrollably. _Oh my god, did I trigger some sort of post-trauma seizure?_

Erin quickly stepped over onto her other side and knelt beside her. "Jillian? Baby, are you ok?!" It was a couple seconds before Erin realized she was not having a seizure, but was instead laughing so hard there were tears in the corners of her eyes. 

"T-that was, the c-cutest thing, I have ever s-seen." she wheezed out. 

Holtz saw the look on Erin's face and sat up, wiping at her eyes. "You just," she paused to take a breath. "you just launched your tiny body with so much determination."

Erin lifted up Holtzmann's tank top to look at the red mark on her hip. "You didn't tear any scar tissue did you?" she started inspecting around the area closely with a furrowed brow. 

"Erin,"she gently grabbed her hands and placed them on her cheeks. "I'm ok." 

She sighed, placing a kiss on Holtz's forehead. "You can't keep scaring me like that!" 

"How else am I going to keep you on your toes." she said with a shrug. Erin made another face and Jillian laughed, moving to stand. 

Erin stood with her, rubbing a hand over her eyes. "Guess we should go get breakfast so we can get back on the road as soon as--" Holtzmann was already half way out the door before she had finished her sentence. 

Erin shook her head, brushing off her pajama shirt. She looked accusingly at the tangled blanket lying innocently on the bed. "As long as there's no breakfast burritos."

* * *

 

Thankfully, there were no breakfast burritos at the buffet downstairs, but there was enough food to feed an army and Holtzmann took full advantage of that. Her plate was filled to the brim with dozens of various breakfast foods; waffles and pancakes were stacked alternately, like some weird tower of batter carbs, and she could have built Stonehenge with how many sticks of french toast lay drenched in maple syrup. 

Erin watched her with a single fruit and yogurt cup clutched in her hands and a mug of coffee steaming on the table in front of her. "Got enough food there Holtz?"

She looked up at her with half a biscuit hanging out of her mouth."Mmhm."

Erin shook her head, glancing around at the tables surrounding them. Very few people were up at this hour, but the ones who were looked to be all couples, with the exception of the family of four seated right next to them. 

The woman held a toddler in her lap, and was tiredly bouncing her up and down on her leg, while the man next to her seemed to be practically falling asleep in his pancakes.What drew her attention though was the little girl, maybe around seven, hanging off her chair and staring directly into Erin's eyes. Her shirt was a vivid blue and the front had something spelled out glittery rhinestones. Upon further inspection, it read: _Science rocks!_

Erin smiled. "I like your shirt."

The little girl continued to stare, before finally slipping off her chair completely and shuffling towards their table. Erin glanced at the parents, but they probably wouldn't notice if a meteor crashed right into the dining room, so she turned to face the girl.

She crept closer to her, placing her small hand on the table next to Erin, and then leaned in and spoke in a hushed whisper. "Are you a Ghostbuster?"

Erin felt a flutter of warmth at being recognized. "Maybe."

The little girls eyes flickered with excitement. "Have you seen a real ghost?" 

"Yes, have you?" she shook her head. "No, but I think my house is haunted."

"Why do you think it's haunted?" 

"I hear a dog barking in the house sometimes," Erin raised an eyebrow, leaning in closer. "but we don't have a dog." 

"Do your neighbors have a dog?"

She thought about it for a moment, tapping a finger on her chin. "Yeah."

"Could it be the neighbors dog barking then?" 

The little girl sighed, almost disappointedly. "Yeah, probably." she all of the sudden noticed Holtzmann, who had stopped eating to watch their exchange with wide eyes. 

She leaned over the table with eyes equally as wide as Holtz's. "You're a Ghostbuster too, right?" 

Holtzmann gave her a teasing smile. "Who wants to know?" 

"Jill."

Erin and Holtz shared a look. "Well Jill, my name is Jillian."

Jill's mouth dropped open. "That's just like my name but longer!"

"You're practically a Ghostbuster."

Christmas had seemed to come early for Jill, as she excitedly wiggled her body. "That is so cool! Can I help you guys catch ghosts?"

"Maybe one day cutie," Holtz watched Erin with adoring eyes. "in the meantime though," Erin stood up and grabbed a pen from the nearby guest list, ripping a page out and sitting back down at the table. "If you ever need help with that pesky ghost dog, you give me a call." she wrote down her personal cell number and gave it to Jill, who took it with an awed look of wonderment. 

"Honey," the woman who Erin assumed was Jill's mother, was standing up from their table with a screaming toddler on her hip. "It's time to go." Jill looked at the two of them one last time before running to join her family, the piece of paper clutched in her fist so tightly her knuckles were turning white. 

Holtzmann was still looking at Erin, waffle and pancake tower left forgotten and growing cold. "What?"

She shook her head, reaching her hand over the table to grasp Erin's. She brought her knuckles to her lips and pressed a slightly sticky kiss to them. Erin's face flushed. She forgot where they were for a minute and leaned over, kissing her full on the mouth. She tasted like maple syrup. Erin sat back in her seat and started to say how much she preferred the sweetness to Holtz's usual salt covered lips, when a gasp sounded behind them. 

A couple seconds later, a woman of about sixty or seventy was briskly walking past them with a scowl on her face. Erin felt a twinge of hurt but Holtzmann just rolled her eyes, picking her fork up and digging back into her cold breakfast. After a minute of Erin twirling a spoon in her uneaten yogurt, the old woman walked in and sat back down at her table. Another woman trailed in behind her, she looked to be about Holtz's age with a high blonde ponytail and a long floral dress that matched most of the wallpaper inside the inn. She had a small name tag pinned to the strap of her dress that Erin couldn't make out, and she came to a stop in front of their table. 

Holtzmann looked up at her with a full mouth of pancakes. Erin looked closer at her name tag: _Maureen._

Maureen had a fake smile plastered on her face and a feeling of dread fell in Erin's stomach. "Good morning ladies," she looked back and forth between them. "I'm terribly sorry to disturb your...breakfast." her smile fell briefly at Holtz's plate of soggy food, but it was back as soon as it had left. "But I've just received a public indecency complaint from a fellow guest."

Erin's eyes widened and Holtzmann choked on the pancake in her mouth. "I'm sorry what?"

"You see, this is a _family_ friendly establishment and we pride ourselves on that," she kept a stiff posture, back ramrod straight. "I just wanted to make sure you don't cause any more problems during your stay, otherwise we'll be forced to escort you out."

Erin stared, shell shocked, but Holtzmann's face had turned deadly. She slammed her fork down on the table with a loud clang, earning a satisfactory jump from Maureen."Problems?" 

"Yes, you know the," she leaned in closer, her voice hushed. "Kissing."

"And why, pray tell me, is kissing a problem?" 

"Well you know, it's quite inflammatory, there's children around."

Holtz was gripping the edge of the table with white knuckles, and Erin was right there with her. "Are you saying that showing affection towards my own girlfriend is not ' _child friendly_ '?" 

Maureen seemed surprised when she used the term girlfriend so loudly. "Please, keep your voice down ma'am." 

"No," Erin stood up. "No, I will not _keep my voice down_. I'm going to keep my voice up is what I'm going to do!" Holtz must have noticed her shaking, as she stood up as well.

"Me and the love of my life," she made sure to raise her voice to all the dining room guests. "are leaving this antiquated, homophobic, and moth ball smelling establishment to go kiss on the top of the statue of liberty, just like our founding fathers intended!" the woman's mouth was hanging open as she stared wide eyed at Erin. "Come on _sweetheart_ , let's go before check out,"she looked down at an invisible watch on her wrist. "Which is at, hmm I don't know, half past nineteen sixty two." 

She grabbed Holtzmann's hand, dragging her past the shell shocked woman, and out the door, turning to go up the stairs to their room. Once there, she slammed the door with a bang and started pacing back and forth in front of it.

"I can't believe this," she waved her hands about. "Public indecency? _Inflammatory_? I've had to suffer watching straight people spit swap out in public every day of my life, so they can damn well handle an innocent peck between two women!" She stopped her pacing when no response came back. Holtzmann was sitting on the edge of the bed, twiddling her thumbs and looking like she'd just sucked on a lemon.

Erin went to sit next to her. "Hey,"she took her hands in her own. "you know they're wrong, right?" 

Holtz nodded. "Yeah, yeah of course. It's not that, it's just..." she trailed off playing with Erin's fingers. "It brought back some memories I don't like to relive." 

"From when you were younger?" 

"Yeah."

"I'm sure Abby told you some things." Erin nodded. "My parents weren't the most supportive people in the world when it came to my sexuality." she paused. "Ok, they weren't supportive at all. Not to mention the kids at school were little hellions." 

Erin made a noise in the back of her throat. "You don't have to tell me twice."

"I had a crush on this girl in my class, and some of the other students found out...let's just say it was _not_ pretty." she sucked in a breath through her teeth. Erin threaded her fingers through Jillian's. 

"Anyways,"she shrugged. "It's just hard to believe there's adults that are still like that."

Erin nodded. "People like Maureen," she said the name in disgust. "need to reevaluate their definition of 'public indecency', I mean, did you see that dress? I'm pretty sure that old woman at the table behind us sewed it for her using one of those curtains." she pointed to the yellow and brown drapes hung on the windows. 

That earned a smile from Holtz. "Gone With The Wind, gone wrong." 

Erin laughed, laying her head on her shoulder. "You ready to get out of this place?"

Holtzmann nodded, clapping a hand on her knee. "We still have another six hours to go."

" _Six?!_ "

* * *

 

Nearly five and half hours sitting in a car can make you go a little crazy. And make your butt hurt. A lot. Erin was laid out on the back seat, chest on the cool leather and rear end sticking up in the air. She asked a question for the millionth time. "Are we there yet?" 

The same response came from the front seat. "Almost."

Erin groaned. "You've been saying that for the past six hours!"

"Yeah I was lying," Erin rolled her eyes."but I'm actually telling the truth now."

Erin grunted, crawling back up into the front seat and nearly whacking Holtzmann in the head with her butt. 

"Watch it, hot stuff." she reached out and poked her behind. Erin yelped and giggled, situating herself back in the front seat. She pulled out her phone and checked the screen.

One new message from Patty and about forty from Abby.

She had been reassuring Abby that they were alive every couple of hours, but this was the first one she had received one from Patty. It read: **TELL HOLTZY TO READ MY TEXTS she hasn't murdered you yet right**

Erin scoffed and wrote a quick reply. _**She's been driving, and I'm fine.** _ She pressed send, and as an after thought typed: _**But turns out, quaint little inn walls are very thin. We received complaints.**_

She waited for a reply with a smirk. She rarely messed with people, but ever since her and Holtz had started dating, it was her favorite thing to make Patty believe they had been going at it like rabbits--even though they hadn't. 

It's not that either of them didn't _want_ to--because boy, they did--but it never felt like the right time. Holtzmann got injured right after they had started dating, and her healing process had taken quite awhile. Not to mention Erin didn't really want their first time to be on a dirty lab table. Because you know, titty fires.

Her phone suddenly dinged and she held in a laugh. **HELL NO. TOO MUCH INFO ERIN. YA'LL DONE PROBABLY RUINED A NICE ELDERLY COUPLES WEEKEND GETAWAY**

_**That's not the only thing we ruined. ;)** _

She could practically see Patty's scandalized face through the phone, so she tucked it away in her back pocket before looking up at the trees streaking by window. 

"Are we there ye--" she was cut off by Holtzmann pointing ahead of them. "Yes." 

A billboard sized sign was ahead of them, and on it looked to be a cartoon beaver in a top hat. The sign read big letters: _WELCOME TO PUNXSUTAWNY!_

Erin slowly turned her head to look at Holtz, who was grinning at the sign with a wild look in her eyes. "Jillian," she warned. "Is this--"

"Yup, uh huh,"she gripped the steering wheel excitedly."Are you ready to meet the groundhog himself, the man behind the hole, Punxsutawny Phil?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ohhh holtzy, we really should have known. i'm going to try and for two or three more chapters before the fifteenth (i'm going to see beyonce on the tenth and my weekend will be swamped AF and thennnn on the fifteenth carmilla season 3 will air and i'll be pretty much useless lmao) but in the meantime go tell me how much you want holtzbert to finally rumble in the jungle over on my tumblr! 
> 
> safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com


	18. Take Me To Church

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> holtz and erin go to some type of heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me, reading this chapter i wrote at four am in the harsh light of day: bithc....you need jesus.....
> 
> i don't know if just a cold shower will work for this one ya'll, maybe a cryo chamber??

Erin got a full history on the famed groundhog on their way into Punxsutawney Pennsylvania. Holtzmann seemed to know more about it all then she did engineering--and that was saying something.

"My one, true wish in life, is to be the first woman initiated into the inner circle."

Erin watched the quaint town streak by. "The what now?"

"Phil has his own squad of a bunch of dapper men in tuxedo's and top hats," Holtz's grin hadn't fell since they entered the town. "three of them are his handlers, and the others are just there to make Phil look good." she chuckled. "Which he needs no help with."

"And how exactly do you become a member of the inner circle?"

"Not sure exactly, but I know you have to be a resident of Punxsutawney."

Erin gave her a look. "We are not moving here."

Holtz stuck out her bottom lip in a pout. Erin laughed and grabbed the hand that wasn't gripping the steering wheel, bringing it up to her lips and placing a gentle kiss on her knuckles. "But, if you manage not to kidnap a groundhog today, I _may_ consider coming back here." 

Holtzmann's eyes lit back up as they pulled into what looked to be an ordinary parking lot. Erin blinked and suddenly Holtz was out of the car and jogging towards the small building situated in the trees. She sighed shaking her head and undoing her seat belt. "The things I do for you."

Holtz had disappeared around the building and Erin soon understood why. She walked into the courtyard, where a large, nearly human sized statue of a groundhog sat smiling. He was donned in a top hat and tuxedo, just as Jillian had described his inner circle gentlemen. Erin expected to find Holtz taking a selfie with it, but instead she was standing underneath an awning that read ' _PHIL'S BURROW_ ',with her back to Erin. She walked up beside her to see a large window, Holtz was looking down at something inside with a slack jaw. Not something--someone.

A small groundhog lay snoozing on his back, head pressed up against the glass and furry belly rising and falling with each breath. Up close,  Punxsutawney Phil looked like any other ordinary rodent to Erin, but to Holtz, he probably looked like a glowing, hairy, angel. 

Holtzmann fell to her knees in front of the window, forehead pressed against the glass and mouth still hanging open. 

"So, that's him huh? Thought he'd look more dapper." 

Holtz's voice came out a whisper. "He's the second greatest thing on this planet." 

"What's the first greatest thing on this planet?" Erin was expecting an answer like Pringles, or dumpster pipes, but Holtz momentarily glanced back at her with a smirk. 

"You."

Erin melted, ignoring how dirty the ground was and sitting cross legged next to Jillian. She laid her head on her shoulder with a sigh. 

Holtz placed a quick peck on her forehead. "How long are you willing to stay here with me and watch our son?" 

"As long as you want,"she raised her head. "our _son_?" 

"I told you I wanted thirteen kids, Phil is our eldest." 

Erin shook her head. "There's no way in hell that came out of me." 

"Hey! He's a little furry, but he's got your nose."

"Yeah, and your ability to sleep anywhere, at any given time." 

"Touche."

They sat on the ground like that for nearly an hour before Erin finally complained. "My butt is becoming one with the concrete."she stood up with a groan."do you want a picture with him before we go?" 

Holtz was already pulling out her phone, she snapped a couple extreme-faced selfies with the still zonked out groundhog and then handed the phone to Erin. She stepped back, and Holtz grinned widely and threw a thumbs up just like she had at the Ronald Reagon potato pancake statue. Erin snapped a few and turned to go before Holtzmann stopped her. 

"Wait! We need a family photo." 

Erin heaved a groan. "Holtz, I'm hungry!"

"Please, just one."

Erin shook her head, walking back over to the window and sliding beside Holtz. "Fine, one!" Jillian turned the front facing camera on and held the phone at arms length, angling it down. Erin plastered a smile on her face. 

"Babe, you look like you just swallowed an entire onion."

"We've been driving for eight hours, I'm tired and so is my mouth!" 

Holtz went to snap the picture again, but at the last second, she turned her head a fraction, and planted a kiss on Erin's cheek. She brought the phone back down and opened the photo. They both looked like they'd been put through the ghost blender after being on the road for so long, but that didn't matter because she had snapped the picture at just the right moment. The genuine grin on Erin's face was one that Holtz wanted to bottle up and save forever. Holtzmann had her lips pressed to her cheek, and Phil lay next to them through the glass, mouth hanging open and little buckteeth showing. 

"Let me see." Holtz handed the phone to Erin. A smile slowly spread across her face. "Now there's a Christmas card."

Holtzmann stood up, grabbing Erin's hands and hauling her up with her. "There's still one more place I want to stop here."

* * *

 

Erin rubbed at her eyes, thinking staring out the window so long had impaired her vision. There was no way the sign in front of them said what she thought it said. 

_**WELCOME TO GOBBLERS KNOB!** _

"Uhh, Holtz?"

"Yeah."

"What exactly is...Gobblers Knob?" 

"This is where Phil makes his weather prediction every year."

"Of course it is."

Holtz was unbuckling her seat belt and hopping out of the car at lightning speed once again. Gobblers knob seemed to be more of a park, and situated at the center of it was a large stage, with a tree stump as a podium and a large backdrop with Phil on it. Since it was early September, thankfully no one was around to see Holtz nearly crack her head open running up the stairs of the stage. She stood behind the podium and raised her hands up to the sky. "Erin! Come take a pic of this so I can Photoshop Phil in my hands later." 

After snapping a couple pictures, Erin watched as Holtz rounded the tree stump to kneel in front of it. A little plaque on it simply read 'Phil' and below it were two mini wooden double doors. She knocked on one and then opened it part way, peaking inside. She closed it with a sigh. "Don't know why I expected him to be in there." she clambered down the stage and walked over to where Erin had been watching with an amused grin. 

"Guess we should find a hotel huh?" 

"Already did." Erin waved her phone. Holtz looked out over the horizon. 

"How long was I up there?" the sun had begun to set, casting them in an orange glow.

"Quite awhile."

Holtzmann threw an arm around her shoulders, leading them back towards the car. "You're the best girlfriend in the world."

"I know." she pecked Holtz's lips. "Now lets go to our hotel and then get some dinner, they don't only serve dirt and grass here right?"

* * *

 

Thankfully, their hotel room wasn't covered in head to toe doyleys like the Hell InN--as Erin has deemed it--but was instead decorated like any other simple Hampton. They sat on the queen sized bed in their pajamas, eating Chinese take-out and watching Saturday Night Live reruns. 

"She kind of looks like you." 

Holtz squinted at the blonde woman on the screen. "I don't see it." 

Erin shrugged, setting aside her food and laying back on the pillows. "So, what's the real reason we're here?"

Holtzmann looked back at her with a mouth full of fried rice."Huh?"

"I know you wanted to come here to see Phil but, is that really it?" 

Holtz chewed slowly, sliding back next to Erin with a frown. "No, that's not it."

She was silent for a couple seconds and Erin nudged her with her elbow. "Why are we here Holtz?" 

Holtzmann sighed, putting her food down and cuddling closer to Erin. "If I tell you, you have to promise not to push me out that window." 

Erin scoffed. "It can't be that bad."

"Ok, but just remember how much you love and adore me right now, in this moment, and don't let that go." 

She pulled in Holtz kissed her temple. "Done." 

Holtzmann took a deep inhale. "We're two hours from your parents house." she squeezed her eyes shut tight, burrowing her head behind a pillow. 

Her statement was met with silence, and she peaked in eye open to gauge the other woman's reaction. Erin was staring down at her hands, picking at the edge of her t-shirt with a sour look. "Yeah, I know."

Holtz came out from behind the pillow fully. "I didn't want to take you all the way there but..."she trailed off when Erin shook her head. 

"I knew how close we were, I just didn't want to say it."

Jillian took her hands. "Hey, we don't have to go. I just wanted to give you the opportunity. I would never pressure you into something you didn't want to do."

A smile tugged at the corner of Erin's lips. "No, it's ok. I think it's time."

Holtz nodded before gently tugging at Erin's shoulders so she laid on her chest. "When was the last time you talked to them?" 

Erin shrugged, burying her face in the fabric of Holtz's shirt. "Sometime before meeting you guys. We used to have a couple phone calls here and there, but none of them lasted longer than ten minutes."

Holtz twirled a piece of her hair around her finger. "Do you think you're ready?"

"Not at all." came the muffled reply.

"Well I'll be right there to spit in some egg salad if you need me to." 

"Why would you be spitting in egg salad?" 

"I don't know, isn't that like a mom thing? Make egg salad for your house guests?"

Erin laughed. "Not that I know of."

"Oh."

"Did you want to spit in some egg salad?"

"Really badly." Erin giggled against her shirt again and reached over to turn off the tv. Holtz flipped the lamp off and they both slid under the covers. Erin sought out her lips in the dark, grabbing the back of her neck and pulling her in closer. She spoke against her lips. "I love you." 

"I love you more."

"Not possible."

It was still a little early, so they stayed awake in the dark for awhile, talking and occasionally kissing. Ok, more than occasionally. It was pretty much all kissing. 

Erin peppered them all across Jillian's face, mapping her out with her lips. Her shirt had ridden up and Erin felt for the raised up scar on her hip. Holtz jumped when she touched it, but soon relaxed when Erin started tracing the jagged line with her finger. She let her hands wander, pulling the hem of her shirt up so it exposed her stomach, and kissed a burning trail down her jaw. She stopped at the collar of her shirt, and then moved lower. Holtz sucked in a breath of air when she felt Erin's lips moving down her stomach and onto her hip. Where her kisses had previously been searing, the one she left on Jillian's scar was a feather light touch of her lips. 

Holtz pulled her back up towards her, and it was hard to tell in the dark, but the look on her face was that of awe. No, not awe, almost...worship. 

Suddenly, her lips were crashing into Erin's and she was clawing at her shirt, wrapping her legs around her waist to pull her in closer. Erin moaned against her mouth, her own hands squeezing at Holtz's sides. She slipped her tongue into her mouth and the groan that met her ears was simultaneously the hottest and most satisfying thing she had ever heard. Erin rolled them so she was on top of Holtz, straddling her waist and biting at her bottom lip. Holtzmann reached up to tangle her hands in Erin's hair, and then immediately moved them back down to tug upwards on the hem of her shirt. Erin responded quickly, detaching their lips momentarily so she could lift up her arms and let Jillian pull it over her head. 

Holtz gazed up at her, eye's never traveling below her face. "You. Are," her voice came out in pants. "The most beautiful thing. I have ever seen."

Erin was positive her voice had stopped working, so instead of replying she reattached their lips with a renewed vigor. Jillian's hands were roaming up and down her bare sides, skittering dangerously close to her chest. Erin striked back by rolling her hips against Holtz's, earning a muffled whimper on her lips. A second later, she was grabbing her waist and sitting up so Erin was cradled in her lap, legs on either side of Jillian's hips, drawing them closer. 

Their kisses turned languid and heavy, so much so that Erin started to feel faint. That didn't stop her from grabbing at the bottom of Holtz's shirt and mumbling against her lips. "Your turn." she quickly obliged, leaning back a little to take her shirt off way sexier then the way Erin had felt when she'd taken hers off. She forgot all about sexy clothing removal tactics when she actually looked at Jillian.

The street lamp outside gave them a whisper of orange light through the cracked blinds, and shadows danced their way across her smooth skin. Her hair had long been undone due to Erin's hands and hung in messy ringlets around her face. Her blue eyes shone in the darkness, gauging for Erin's reaction. Erin understood now the way Jillian was looking at her earlier, as it was the same way she was probably looking at her now. 

She traced a finger down the side of her face, lingering over her collarbone and passing across her chest, finally coming to a stop at the waist band of her pants. Erin pressed her forehead to Jillian's and exhaled, letting their breaths mingle. They stayed like that for nearly a full minute, before Holtz gently turned to lay Erin back down on the bed, settling herself between her legs. She left a burning trail of kisses across every inch of her skin, once she reached the top of her shorts, she looked up at Erin with a questioning brow. She nodded a confirmation and then Jillian was slipping off her shorts in one smooth motion. Erin didn't bother to care if she was even wearing cute underwear today because Holtz's lips were back on hers, kisses slow and unhurried. She tickled her fingers down Jillian's side, earning a rare giggle against her lips, and then she pinched lightly on the skin above her waistband, asking a question without detaching from her. 

Holtzmann's head nodded above her and Erin tried to slip off her pants in one fail swoop like Holtz had just done, but granted, shorts were different then sweat pants and Erin didn't have a lot of leverage from the position she was in. She tried a couple times, tugging and wiggling to get them off--to no avail. 

Jillian tried to help by kicking her legs, but that only seemed to get her even more tangled up and cause her to slip further down Erin's body. Having no choice but to remove her lips from Erin's, she ended up turning on her back with her head resting on Erin's thigh and viciously kicking at the pants. 

Meanwhile, Erin was above her, gazing down at the blonde head that was quietly cursing and furiously trying to get her pants off, and only thinking one thing.

_It's no big deal but, I'm probably going to marry this woman._

She was pulled out of her thoughts by a cry of victory and a pair of sweatpants flying across the room and getting caught on a lampshade. Jillian had successfully removed the pesky garment and was laying her head back onto Erin's stomach with a huff. "I'm burning those tomorrow." her voice came out a throaty whisper. 

Erin chuckled, sliding forward so her chest was up against Jillian's back. She wrapped her arms around her waist and moved her hair to the side to place sloppy kisses against her neck. Holtz leaned back against her touch, letting her head fall back on Erin's shoulder. She ran her hands up and down her thighs, occasionally scratching and leaving little nail marks whenever Erin would suck on a portion of her skin. She craned her neck to kiss her, reaching a hand up to cup the side of her jaw. As soon as their lips connected, Erin was pulling away and slipping out from behind her. Jillian almost panicked, thinking she'd done something wrong, but then Erin was pushing her lightly back onto the pillows and crawling up onto her body. 

Erin brushed a stray piece of hair behind Jillian's ear and leaned down to kiss her again. One hand held onto her neck while the other wondered to the edge of her underwear, and she pulled it down slightly to run her fingers across the junction where Jillian's hip met her thigh. She immediately responded with a whimper, bucking her hips slightly against Erin's touch. 

Erin smirked against her lips, palming her side and pushing her hips back onto the mattress. Jillian tried to run her hands down her legs but Erin quickly caught both wrists and pinned them gently above her head, earning a satisfying moan. Erin situated herself on one of Holtz's thighs, using her knee to effectively rub between her legs. This time Erin had to practically wrestle her hips back down while still holding her wrists with one hand. She rocked her own hips onto Jillian's thigh, creating friction that made them both let out a low moan. At this point, Erin was one hundred percent certain her underwear were long ruined. 

Holtz used her moment of distraction to free her hands and push them over so she was straddling Erin's hips. She leaned in close to her ear. "My turn." she felt a shudder underneath her and grinned as she licked a quick trail from her ear and down her neck, stopping at her collarbone. She ran her tongue back and forth on a concentrated spot and sucked the skin there, gently biting licking it alternately. Erin's heaving chest and near constant stream of whimpers told her everything she needed to know. Jillian gave her neck a break and moved up to look at her face in the darkness. Her lips were bright red and swollen, and her hair looked like it had been through the ghost blender, as she looked up at Holtz through heavy-lidded eyes. 

"You gonna take off your underwear anytime soon?" Erin's voice was a raspy whisper.

Holtzmann smirked. "I thought you'd never ask."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i've never done any kind of smutty smut but this bordered on some i think!! wasn't sure if i should have them do the do in a hotel in pennsylvania but...it doesn't really matter where they're at you know?? also i know battle creek michigan is like 6 hrs from where they're at but i didn't want to put my children through that much more driving lmao
> 
> a little weary on this chapter so let me know how i did below and on my tumblr!! safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com


	19. Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> erin's found a new home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WHOOPS I ACCIDENTALLY DIDN'T UPDATE FOR TWO WEEKS i'm so sorry y'all beyonce wrecked me and then carmilla drop kicked me so i've been really out of the writing mood but i hope you enjoy this!!
> 
> WARNING: SLIGHT BIPHOBIA TOWARDS THE END OF THE CHAPTER bi babes skip over a lil if u have to!!!

The sound of birds chirping awoke Erin from a deep sleep and she blinked slowly against the harsh light. It took a couple seconds for her to remember what had transpired the night before, and a hot flush spread steadily through her body and down to the tips of her toes. She finally focused her eyes on the woman curled up against her and had to catch her breath.

The early morning sunlight cast rays through the window and glinted off Jillian's back. Her hair was a mess on the pillow but still shone like spun silk, and her soft puffs of breath on Erin's chest caused goosebumps to erupt on her skin. 

Holtzmann twitched and pried open her eyes slowly, seeming to sense the way Erin was burning holes into her. A lazy smile spread across her lips as she started to trace soft patterns on Erin's bare hip. "G'morning."

Erin brushed some hair off her forehead and pressed a kiss there. "Morning."

"How do you feel?"

Erin's mouth twitched. "Sore."

Holtz buried a smirk in her chest. "Sorry." she didn't sound sorry.

"Don't be," Erin absentmindedly twirled a piece of her hair around her finger. "Was I...ok?"

Jillian pulled back to look at her with raised eyebrows. "Ok? You were more than just 'ok'. You were, Oh-my-god-where-did-you-learn-to do-that-and-who-raised you- _fantastic_." 

Erin scoffed. "It couldn't have been that good."

Holtz made a face. "Don't sell yourself short Gilbert,that thing you did where you--" 

Erin was already cutting her off. "What about when you--"

"Uh, uh, uh," Holtz was shaking her head. "best part of the night was how you--" 

"Please, that was nothing compared to your--" 

"Erin," she pressed her hand against her back, pulling her closer so that their foreheads touched. "That was. Hands down. The best sex. I have ever had." 

A soft smile spread across Erin's face and she leaned forward to capture her lips. "Ditto."  
Holtz reciprocated happily, slipping her leg between Erin's and earning a cross between a moan and a sigh against her mouth. She smiled and pulled back, propping herself up on her elbow. "Are you ready to face today, my love?"

Erin groaned laying back against the pillows. "Not at all."

Holtzmann ran a hand across her bare stomach beneath the sheets. "Would waffles help?"

* * *

 

After ordering far too much room service, and Holtz nearly answering the door stark naked, the two of them gathered up their clothes from the night before ("You're not leaving the pair of underwear on the lamp for the poor maid." "But--" "Holtz!") and headed back out on the road. The weather was finally starting to feel like September and cool early-autumn air blew through the open window. Erin had her knee high sock clad feet up on the dashboard and Holtzmann had borrowed an over sized green sweater from her, and was humming along to the slow methodical song playing out of the radio. 

"Can we stay like this forever?"

"Hmm?" Jillian glanced over at her.

"Let's just keep driving, until we reach an ocean." Holtz raised an eyebrow. "and then we'll take a boat and keep going somewhere far away."

"Ok," she grabbed Erin's hand and kissed her knuckles, keeping her eyes on the road."sounds good to me."

Erin smiled, enjoying pretending for a moment. "We could build one of those crazy treehouses, and live in like, the amazon rainforest or something."

"Deal. As long as we get the guy from Treehouse Masters to come help build it."

"Obviously."

Erin gazed out at the trees blurring past, ignoring the way her stomach was flip flopping at the prospect of being so close to her hometown again.

"How much longer?"

"Two hours and ten minutes." 

Erin sighed. This was going to be the longest car ride of her life.

* * *

 

As it turns out, having incredibly hot and wild sex-capades with your girlfriend the night before, and then waking up early, can really mess up your REM cycle. Erin woke when a hand started to brush up and down her arm. 

"I hate to wake the sleeping beauty, but we're here."

Erin was suddenly sitting up, sucking in a breath when a sharp pain went up the back of her neck from the odd angle she had been napping in. She glanced out the window to see familiar streets and buildings streaking by, and had to stop her hands from shaking. 

"Oh by the way, I have no clue how to get to your parents house."

Erin typed her old address into the GPS and tried to calm her nerves. How are her parents going to react to seeing her after so many years? Will they believe her, now that they've come face to face with a ghost themselves? Oh my god, what are they going to do when she brings home her _girlfriend_? A million thoughts swam in her head as city streets turned to quiet suburbs and neatly trimmed lawns. Holtzmann must have sensed her nerves and reached over to thread her fingers through Erin's. "You good?"

Erin nodded. "Peachy."

" _You have arrived at your destination_." the GPS's robotic voice pierced the air as they pulled into the driveway of a house almost identical to all the rest. Erin let out a shaky breath as Holtz turned off the ignition and squeezed her hand. "You don't have to do this, I'll turn the car around right now if you want." 

Erin shook her head. "No, it's ok." she unbuckled her seat belt. "I'm ready."

They made their way up the stone steps and to the red front door that Erin had always loved as a kid. She squared her shoulders and knocked three quick raps on the wood, almost hoping nobody was home. Her dreams were squashed when footsteps sounded on the other side of the door, and the handle twisted it open. A familiar face appeared in front of them and a pair of blue eyes widened in recognition. "Erin?"

Marlene Gilbert looked the same as she always had, graying hair tied up in a knot on the top of her head, and loose blouse tucked neatly into a pair of pressed dress slacks, ready to enter a court room at a moments notice. 

"Hi Mom." Marlene continued to blink for a moment before pulling Erin into a bone crushing hug. 

"Oh sweetie, it's been too long." she pulled back to look Erin up and down. "What are you doing here? Weren't you..." she gulped. "In New York?" Erin could tell there was something else she wanted to say in there but let it pass. "We were just in the neighborhood, thought we'd stop by." 

Marlene suddenly seemed to notice there was someone else with her and shook her head. "Where are my manners," she stuck out a hand."Marlene Gilbert, and you are?" 

"Holtzmann," she shook the other woman's hand with a grin. "I've heard terrible things about you."

"What?"

"Heyyy, Mom," Erin interrupted. "Aren't you going to invite us inside?" Marlene shook off Holtz's comment and opened the door wider. "Yes, yes, of course, come in."

Erin threw a glare at Holtzmann who shrugged. They shuffled inside the house and Erin was immediately thrown back in time. The same terrible green carpet covered every square inch of the floor, and the walls were what Erin's mother called "Carmel Creamer" --but to her they had always just looked like vomit. Marlene led them into the living room, where the only updated decor was the large brown leather couch, and a 40 inch flat screen TV, separated from each other only by the small glass coffee table adorned with a bouquet of fake flowers. 

Holtzmann dropped onto the sofa, lifting her feet onto the coffee table for two seconds, before thinking better of it and crossing her legs. Erin sat next to her, nervously wringing her hands in her lap. 

"Would you ladies like some tea?" 

Erin nodded. "Green please."

"And for you..." she trailed off. "Holtzmann, is it?" 

"Could I just have a cup of hot water please?"

Erin nudged her with her elbow. "Uh-green's fine for me too." 

Marlene walked out with another confused head shake and Erin let out a breath she didn't know she'd been holding. Jillian scooted closer to her on the couch and rubbed a hand on her leg. "How ya holding up, honey?"

"Great."

"You're lying."

"Yup."

"Do you need to do any stretches? I've found it helps calm my nerves." Holtz stood up and reached her arms above her head, wiggling her fingers and diving forward, nearly whacking into the coffee table. 

Erin swatted her butt. "No! Stop that, please."

Jillian smirked, sitting back down. "Relax, you're mom seems chill enough."

"Oh, just you wait."   
Holtz placed a quick peck on her lips, pulling away just as Erin's mom walked back in the room with two steaming mugs in her hand. 

Erin quickly jumped up, grabbing two small coasters from underneath the coffee table and placing them on the glass. "Where's Dad?"

Marlene set the mugs down carefully. "He's down at city hall, filling out a couple more things for a recent case."

Erin reached for the cup closest to her, blowing on the hot tea for something to do. "Still hard at work then?" Marlene nodded, sitting down in a antique chair adjacent to the couch. Though judging by her posture, she still looked to be standing. 

"So," she folded her hands in her lap. "I'm guessing you saw the story on the news." 

Erin cleared her throat. "Um, yeah...how are you guys holding up?"

Marlene shifted. "Fine. Though it was quite the elaborate prank."

Holtzmann's eyebrows scrunched. "Huh?" 

"Well," she made a face."I imagine it took quite the team to concoct such a realistic depiction of the undead."

Erin's eyes widened in disbelief and she quickly set down her tea. "I'm sorry Mother, did I hear your correctly just now?"

Marlene stayed silent, crossing her legs and smoothing out a wrinkle on her shirt sleeve. 

"You had a ghost stare you in the face, and you still don't believe they exist?" 

"Oh for gods sake Erin, not this again!" Marlene huffed out a breath and sat back in her chair. "You're not eight anymore."

Erin sputtered. "Were you not watching? The ghosts in New York? The mass hysteria?"

Her mother waved a hand. "I don't believe everything I see on the news." 

"And that's _fine_ , what's the most upsetting is that you never believed your own daughter about anything!" 

"Honey, your imagination was much more wild then most of the other girls your age, how could we believe any of it?" 

Erin stood up suddenly, knocking her knees hard onto the coffee tables edge. "I wouldn't know about other girls my age, seeing as you paid kids to be my friend and we never got around to the whole actual _being friends_ portion of things."

Holtzmann had been silent up until now. " _What!?_ "

Erin spun on her heel and stormed out, her foot steps hitting hard on the wooden stairs. A door slam earned an exasperated sigh from her Mother. 

Holtz was staring at her with an unreadable expression. "You paid children to be your daughters friend?"

"None of the kids at school wanted anything to do with her, what else was I supposed to do? " 

Holtzmann stood up with a sniff. "Oh I don't know, maybe tried not being a horrible person?" she moved towards the door. "just a thought."

* * *

 

It took Holtzmann a few tries to find Erin, but she finally opened a door to a room very similar to her own from when she was a kid. The walls were a simple beige, but they were covered nearly head to toe with posters of famed scientists, equations written in scrawly handwriting on notebook paper, and many various stickers ranging from horses, to little moons and stars. A large realistic mobile of the solar system hung on the ceiling and looked to be collecting dusts along with the rest of the room. A desk shoved in the far corner had books upon books teetering dangerously on top of each other and each looked more ancient than the other. Her attention was drawn away by the small form huddled on the twin bed pushed beneath an open window, the late afternoon sunlight revealed dust particles swirling through the air and the gentle breeze coming in ruffled the array of stray papers covering the olive carpet.

Holtzmann picked her way through the mess and scooted up onto the bed next to Erin. "Hey," she said softly. "No offense but, your mom's kind of a butthead." 

Erin lifted her head from where it was hidden on her knees. "None taken."she sniffled a little, avoiding eye contact by looking out the window behind them. 

Holtz reached forward and gently wiped away a stray tear. "I'm sorry."

Erin furrowed her brow. "For what?" 

"For making you come here."

"Holtz! You didn't make me do anything, this was my choice."she slid closer, wrapping her arm around Jillian's and resting her head in the crook of her neck. "Plus, if we hadn't gone on this trip we would have never met our long lost son."

"So _now_ you're accepting Phil as your own?"

"For the time being."

Holtz threaded her fingers through Erin's. "Some other fun stuff happened too."

Erin smirked. "Yeah, I guess."

"You guess?"

She pressed a kiss to Jillian's neck with a laugh, just as a knock sounded on the door. 

Erin jumped back quickly and let go of Holtz,earning a frown. "Come in."she sighed.

Marlene Gilbert slowly opened the door and stood at the threshold, wringing her hands. "I'm sorry sweetheart," she took a step inside. "Can we put everything aside, just for tonight, and have a nice family dinner like we used to?"

Erin never remembered their family dinners being 'nice' per-say, but she couldn't deny wanting to see her dad. She looked to Holtz, who had crossed her arms and put on her ' _I-don't-trust-you-so-I'm-going-stare-at-you-until-you're-uncomfortable_ ' face on. "Would you be ok with that?"

"Up to you, babe." 

Marlene's eyebrows furrowed and Erin quickly agreed. "Yes fine, we'll stay."

At that moment the front door opened and shut. Marlene looked almost relieved. "That must be your father, I'll let him know you're here." 

After her footsteps had faded down the stairs, Holtz took Erin's hand again. "You sure you want to stay?"

Erin nodded. "It should be fun, right?"

* * *

 

Looking at Doug Gilbert, Holtzmann couldn't figure out what part of him Erin had gotten. Their faces were practically opposites, his deep set eyes were a milky shade of green, and his long, almost hooked nose was shiny and bright red--even though the temperature hadn't dropped below 65 degrees this afternoon--combined with his balding grey hair and small stature, him and Erin couldn't look _less_ alike.

"Dad, this is my gi-friend Holtzmann."she caught herself quickly and Holtz raised in eyebrow.

His handshake was firm, but he smiled warmly at her. "Nice to meet you, Holtzmann. Is that a nickname?"

"Last name. First name's Jillian, but only pretty girls and my optometrist get to call me that." 

Doug squinted for a moment before nodding, albeit confusedly.

Dinner went smoother then Erin thought it would, with her parents talking about work and her shoveling lasagna in her mouth so fast that even Holtzmann was looking at her with a wide-eyed expression. 

Eventually though,the inevitable came up. 

"So, you two must be pretty close if you drove all the way up here together huh?" her father took a sip of wine and looked at the two women sitting across from him.

Erin was about to answer through a mouth full of lasagna, but Holtz saved her. "Yes sir, we sure are." her face looked sour as the words came out, and Erin knew why. 

She had been putting off telling them, but she knew she'd regret it if she didn't,so she swallowed the last bit of noodles down and squared her shoulders. "Actually, Mom, Dad,"she grabbed Holtz's hand on top of the tablecloth. "Jillian and I are in a relationship."

Her parents stared blankly for a moment before her Dad finally spoke. "So you're...lesbians?"

"She is, but I'm bisexual." Holtz squeezed her hand. 

Her Mother still had not spoken a word, but Doug didn't seem to be fazed. "I've heard of that, what exactly does it mean?"

"It means I'm attracted to both men and women."

Doug nodded slowly. "Makes sense."

"Does it?" Marlene said finally. Erin's stomach dropped. "Why can't you just choose?" 

Holtz cleared her throat. "Sorry?"

"Just pick one, how can you be attracted to both?" 

Erin struggled to find her voice, feeling her throat start to close up and hands start to sweat. Thankfully, her father saved her.

"Really, Marlene? I had a bagel for breakfast today but that doesn't mean I'm only going to eat a bagel for breakfast for the rest of my life."

"Oh please, Doug, that's not the same thing!"

Erin tuned out her parents bickering as Holtz leaned in towards her. "Are you ok? You're hand is getting swampy."

Erin let out a shaky breath. "Can we go please?"

Holtz nodded and pushed her chair back, pulling Erin to stand. "This has been delightful Mr. and Mrs. Gilbert, but we need to get back on the road before sundown." 

The two stopped their arguing for a moment. "Are you sure? You two could stay the night and then I could show you around Battle Creek in the morning." Erin's father placed his napkin on the table and stood up. 

"Thank you Dad but, I think we've had enough sightseeing these past few days."

Doug nodded. "I'll walk you out then."

Erin glanced at her Mother, who hadn't moved to stand. "Goodbye, Mom." 

Marlene gave her a tight lipped smile. "Goodbye, Erin."

Doug pulled Erin aside when they stepped out onto the front porch and Holtzmann pretended to look at the chipping paint on the siding. 

"Just give her a little time, she'll come around." Erin sighed and gave him a hug. 

"Thanks, Dad." he pulled away and moved to shake Holtz's hand. 

"You two better come to visit again soon, I'd like to get to know the woman who's dating my daughter." 

Holtzmann smiled. "And I'd like to see some baby photos, looks like we both have something to look forward to." 

Doug laughed and waved as they walked back to the car, and then turned to go back inside. 

Once in the car, they sat in silence for a moment before Erin spoke. "This used to be home for me, but now..." she trailed off. 

"You found a new home?" Jillian finished for her.

"Yeah," Erin took her hand with a happy sigh. "You're my home now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'd make someone guess what the song of the chapter is but i honestly just need everyone to listen to it so it's Home by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros!!
> 
> when will i update next? who can Truly Say we all just floating thru time...but u can float on over to my tumblr safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com


	20. This Is Halloween

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> holtz regrets everything and erin has a thing for wizards

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it has been.....exactly one month.....since i've updated.....im so sorry fam but carmilla happened oK 
> 
> please enjoy this spooky scary chapter!!!
> 
> WARNING: disturbing images of spooks and scares!! (but really blood & gore tw)

A solid weight against Erin's abdomen pulled her out of a particularly strange dream, wherein Kevin and Patty had switched bodies and then proceeded to look up tutorials on how to do the macarena so they could perform it, live on stage at Madison Square Garden. She _really_ needed to cut down on sugar before bed. She turned her attention back to what had woken her up, prying open her eyes slowly and trying to focus on what was so close to her face. After nearly a minute of blinking, she realized what the weight was on top of her. 

Holtzmann was straddling her waist, with her forehead pressed against Erin's and blue eyes staring intently. This close, Erin could count every freckle on her cheeks. "Good morning."

"Holtz.." she stopped to yawn. "why are you up so early?"

Holtzmann pulled back a fraction to let Erin stretch. "I wanted to surprise my lovely girlfriend with the bagels she likes from down the street," Erin's eyes lit up. "but, I found something laying on the sidewalk that could not be ignored." 

Erin deflated. "And what might that be?" 

Holtz suddenly whipped out a flyer from behind her back. "This." she handed it to Erin who shifted into a sitting position with a sigh, Holtzmann still seated comfortably in her lap. 

The flyer was definitely picked up off a dirty New York sidewalk, as it was ripped at the edges and practically oozing dirt and oil. Through the muck, Erin could make out words scrawled in sharp and shaky lettering: _**THE EDGE OF HELL.**_

Erin blinked. "Been there." 

It was Holtz's turn to sigh. "Yes, I know, but this isn't the _actual_ edge of hell, just a replica."

"What?"

"A haunted house, Erin!" Holtz snatched the flyer back and waved it around. "It's almost Halloween and I want to go."

Erin yawned again. "Jill, our entire life is Halloween, why do you want to pay money just for some dumb animatronics to jump out at you when we catch real live ghosts," she laughed a little. "Or I guess, not live."

Holtzmann crawled off her lap and plopped down next to her on the mattress. "Never mind, it was a dumb idea." 

Erin furrowed her brow. "Hey, it's not dumb. Why do you want to go so bad?"

Holtz shrugged. "I kind of forgot they existed up until now, but I always wanted to go to one as a kid. My parents would never let me though." 

"Oh," Erin softened. "Ok well, how about we go tonight." Holtzmann looked at her through her eyelashes. "Really?"

Erin scooted closer to her, bumping her hip. "Yeah! We can invite Abby and Patty and make it a fun girls night that doesn't involve ghosts, or running for our lives."

"I mean, that is technically what a haunted house is Erin."

Erin laughed. "You know what I mean." she kissed the dimple in Holtz's smile and sat back. "So...about those bagels?" 

Holtzmann hopped up from the mattress and disappeared outside the tarp, reappearing a few seconds later with a brown paper bag in hand."You really think I'd wake up at the asscrack of dawn, just to _not_ get them?"

"God, I love you"

* * *

 

  
After vigrous pleading with Patty and Abby, neither of them were down for haunted house girls night. ("You know I'm gonna end up punchin' anyone who jumps out at me.") So it just turned into a date night for Holtz and Erin.

Holtzmann bounced excitedly as they walked from the car and up to the address listed on the flyer. The sun was all but set and the late October air bit sharply as the wind blew. Holtz was bundled in a black and white chevron sweater and a colorful striped scarf that engulfed nearly half of her face. Her hands were clad in large mittens that had a printed tiny skeleton man walking a skeleton dog on the tops of them, though that wasn't what topped off the outfit. What really did it was the hair. The heating in Erin's car didn't work, and Holtz had roughly undone her updo because: "My ears are fragile baby birds, they need some sort of protection from this cold, Erin." Erin could have suggested ear muffs, but that would have deprived her of the current vision of Holtzmann's curls blowing across her pink dimpled cheeks as she bounded towards the entrance to a looming building.

It looked like every other building in the old industrial neighborhood they were in, besides the fact that it had the name of the haunted house painted on the brick in large red letters, and a small line of other cold people winded out the front door. They made it to the back of the line and huddled together for warmth. Holtz took Erin's bare hands in her gloved ones and blew a puff of warm air into them before sticking them in either of her arm pits. 

"Holtz! Ew." 

Holtzmann rolled her eyes. "Your hands have been grosser places on my body."

Erin shut up. 

Thankfully, the line moved quickly and they made it inside before turning into icicles. The ticket giver was a woman who looked like she'd gotten in a particularly nasty fight with a bear. Slash marks gauged her cheeks and down her chest and oozed fake blood. Her tattered costume looked to be an old nurses uniform, though it was also covered in blood and other unidentifiable stains. By the looks of it, Erin was guessing the theme this year was 'Asyulm'--typical. She refrained from any comments about how overdone the theme was and got them their tickets. They followed the bloody footprints on the floor to a man in a similar looking costume, except he wore a pair of old scrubs that probably used to be white but were now the color of old mustard. He did a manic sort of laugh and held open a black curtain behind him. "The doctor will see you now." 

Erin rolled her eyes and pushed through the curtain, pulling Holtz with her. She had taken off her gloves once they were inside, and Erin noted the way her hands felt a little clammy in her own.

They walked along a hallway with dim florescent lighting that flickered ominously with every step. The sound of dripping water came from a speaker somewhere above them and peirced the silence. "Nice surround sound they got here--" she was cut off by a loud scream that came from up ahead of them and sent chills down her spine.

Holtzmann's hand was definitely sweating now as they neared closer to a light at the end of the hallway. It opened up into a brightly lit room that was replicated to look like a bathroom of sorts. White tile was on the walls and the floor, but so was a whole lot of blood. Bath tubs were spaced throughout the room and half of them were filled to the brim with it, as well as a shower head in the corner steadily pouring it out. A single woman in a hospital gown lay in one of the empty bathtubs, ratted hair covering her face and head lolled against her arm. Erin already anticipated what was going to happen, but she gasped anyways when the woman suddenly screamed and tried to claw at them as they walked by. They quickly scurried away and Erin blew out a puff of air. "Warming us up I see," she called as they walked out the door at the other end of the room. "Very considerate ma'am." 

Holtzmann had been quiet since the moment they walked in, but she let out a soft laugh. 

They continued down a hallway similar to the one they'd entered through, though this one had considerably more blood on the walls and got darker and darker as they went.Distant screams echoed around them and seconds later they were plunged into complete darkness. 

Erin felt Holtz tense up beside her and she squeezed her hand. "Holtz? You good?" 

"Peachy." 

They shuffled through the darkness for almost a minute before a light suddenly flickered on brightly next to them followed by a growl of sorts. Stood in a small nook in the wall was a man in a straight jacket, who's face was gruesomely bloody and burned and blistering. He stared at them through heavy lidded eyes and violently shook and screamed as they scurried past. Erin heaved out a sigh. "He needs to see a doctor about those burns...what do you think they did that with? Coffee grounds? I've seen those done with coffee grounds before..."she trailed off as the hallway got dark again and no response came from the woman beside her. 

"Holtz?"

"Yeah?"

"You're bruising my arm." 

Holtzmann let up her grip on Erin's forearm and puffed out a breath."T _his will be fun_  I said." 

Erin furrowed her brow. "Are you actually scared of this stuff?" 

More silence. 

"Aww Jill," she wrapped an arm around the shorter woman and pulled her into her side. "You know this is all fake, we deal with actual ghosts all the ti--" she was cut off by a figure in the darkness running towards them at an alarming speed. She couldn't help but let out a squeal as she pulled them against the wall, squeezing her eyes shut as what was probably a very bloody actor got up really close next them and cackled, before sprinting back the way it came. 

Erin opened her eyes again, as the person disappeared down the hallway and she breathed out a laugh. "Ok that one got me a little." she turned to Holtzmann, who was pressed up against the wall, chin pulled back tightly and eyes as wide as golf balls. The last time Holtz had made that face was the first time she had seen Erin with her shirt off--so this must have been a big deal.

"Jillian?" 

"Mmhm." 

"Are you ok?"

"Mmmm." 

Erin tugged her away from the wall. "The sooner we start walking, the sooner we can get out of here ok?" 

Holtzmann nodded sharply and sniffed. "It's all fake, no fear here." 

Erin held in a laugh and started pulling her further down the hallway. "I'm a little disappointed actually, this place has more suspense then it does scares." 

The hallway opened up into a large room, much like the bathroom they were in earlier, though this one had the main event. A spotlight shone down on a what looked to be an operating table in the middle of the room, and on it lay a woman who had more blood on her then Erin was pretty sure anyone even had in their body. Above her stood a doctor in an equally blood splatter lab coat. The most disturbing part was what the doctor was doing: sticking dangerously sharp looking pieces of glass into the woman's body. Each time he pushed a shard in, he'd cackle and she'd scream like a well orchestrated and gruesome symphony. 

Erin swallowed. "Neat trick guys...you're uh, you're really selling it. Right Holtz?" she felt beside her, just now realizing there was no longer a hand in her own. "Holtz?" she felt a gust of cold wind and heard a door shut, and looked to see an exit sign dimly lit in the corner of the room. 

"Shit..." she ignored the doctors cackle behind her as she yanked open the heavy door and braced herself for the cold.

The door led out to what must've been the side of the building, and Erin shivered against the wind. "Jillian?" She could distinctly make out her girlfriends figure in the darkness, leaning up against the brick wall and breathing heavily.

"Hey," she gently placed her hands on her shoulders. "Jill, look at me." she noted the way Holtz's hands were placed almost protectively over the left side of her hip, and tilted her chin up to look at her. Her blue eyes were unfocused, and her breathing was coming out in shallow pants. "You're ok, you're safe." 

Holtzmann's eyes finally met hers, and soon thereafter welled up with tears. She buried her face in Erin's chest, arms coming to wrap around her waist and clutch the fabric of her sweatshirt. Erin tangled her hands in Holtz's curls and placed a kiss to the top of her head, rocking them back and forth. After a few minutes, she pulled back and wiped at Jillian's pink cheeks. "Lets get out of this cold, yeah?" 

The drive home was silent, though Holtzmann didn't let Erin's hand go the entire way. Under normal circumstances she would have deemed it unsafe to not have two hands on the wheel, but she would have gladly took her other one off too if it meant making Holtz feel better.

The fire station was empty when they got there, and they wordlessly changed into pajamas and curled up on the couch downstairs. Holtz lay between Erin's legs, head on her chest and knees pulled in, mindlessly watching some cooking show on the TV in front of them. 

"I'm sorry."

Erin paused her de-tangling of Holtzmann's hair. "For what?" 

"Making us go to that stupid place."

"Hey, at least now we know never to go there ever again." 

Holtzmann was silent as she pulled up the edge of her shirt to look at the jagged scar on her hip. "It's almost like it was burning the entire time we were in there."

"We must have been in the presence of Voldemort then." 

A smile slowly spread across Jillian's face as she craned her neck to kiss Erin. "I love you nerd." 

"I love you too weirdo."

* * *

 

 "Erin please wear it."

"I'm a ghost for Halloween every year and that's that!" 

"Erin, I am begging you to wear it."

"No!"

Holtzmann was quite literally on her knees, holding a plastic costume bag in her hands and pleading up at Erin with big puppy dog eyes. She heaved a sigh and stood up, and then suddenly got an idea. "If you wear this costume for at _least_ two hours, I will..." she leaned in and whispered something in her ear. 

Erin's eyes widened, as Holtz pulled back with a smirk. She snatched the bag out of her hands. "Deal."

Thirty minutes later, Holtzmann was clapping her hands together and doing wild kicks in excitement as Erin walked out of the bathroom, no longer herself, but instead a young wizard boy, ready for a magic filled year at Hogwarts. 

"This wig is itchy!" she rubbed at the black messy hair on her head. 

"Is it weird that I'm still attracted to you in that?" 

"A little bit yes." 

Erin adjusted the circular glasses on her face. "What are you going to be again?"

"It's a surprise!" Jillian clapped her hands together and pushed Erin towards the steps. "Go greet some small heathens, I'll be down shortly."  
Erin sighed, but hiked up her robes and made her way down the stairs, pausing only to adjust the little orange pumpkin lights that were looped around the railing. 

She made it to the bottom of the steps and loud laughter interrupted her thoughts of Holtzmann in a little black witches outfit. "You look like Harry Potter's long lost sister who got rejected at the doors of the castle." 

"Shut up." she looked Patty's frighteningly historically accurate period dress up and down. "Harriet Tubman?" 

Patty spread out her hands with a grin. "You know it." 

At that moment, Abby walked out of the kitchen with a large bowl of candy and stopped short when she saw Erin. "Oh, you'll be that for Holtzmann but not for me? I've been trying to get you into a Harry costume for years!" 

Abby's costume was completely white, a turtleneck looping around her head and a giant white odd-shaped hat to top it off. Her face was painted to look like a cat, and Erin finally got it. 

"Cat nun?" 

Abby smiled. "I knew you'd get it! Patty thought I just rustled this up last minute." she looked at Erin ' _can you even believe that?_ ' face.

"I don't understand you're sci-fi nerd stuff ok!" 

Erin looked around. "Where's Kevin?" 

Patty shrugged. "He said he was on his way, but that was like an hour ago--holy god." 

Erin turned to see what she was staring at and nearly dropped her wand. 

Kevin had walked through the front doors, wearing what she hoped was a bald cap, that was scrawled all over with tattoos that extended down his arms in various swirls and spirals.

"Hey guys!" 

They were all silent. 

"Can you tell what my costume is? Ok, I'll tell you, I'm Steel!"

Patty blanched. "Who is..."

"Don't ask."

Erin and Abby were saved from explaining by booming laughter that came from the stairway. 

"Wizard daddy's home, where are all my little wizard children?" 

Erin almost fainted. Walking down the steps was someone who was in no way shape or form her girlfriend anymore, but a wise old Albus Dumbledore. Holtzmann swept her large blue robes back with a floruish. The long white beard and hair combo blew up with it and Erin blinked slowly. "I can't believe..."

"That I look this hot as an ancient wizard? Yeah I know."

"Professor huh...not bad."

Holtz winked. "That's headmaster to you, Potter." 

Patty shook her head. "I-I gotta go sit down...y'all are too much." she disappeared into the kitchen and Abby set the bowl of candy near the door. "You look beautiful Holtz." 

"Why thank you Abigail, I'm glad _someone_ appreciates it." 

Kevin tugged at long white piece of hair on Holtzmann's wig. "This reminds me of my uncle john." 

"How so, Kev?" 

"Well he started going grey at sixteen and never cut his hair--" he was cut off by the loud doorbell chiming. Holtzmann clapped her hands together. "The first victims." 

She answered the door for the trick or treaters in a dramatic British accent, and wouldn't give any of them candy unless they guessed the password, which turned out to be 'soggy'. And when a little girl with blonde hair swooped over to one side and yellow sunglasses on top of her head came to the door and excitedly asked for a picture, Erin pretended not to notice Holtz wiping at her eyes with her ridiculously long beard.

The team sat around most of the night, watching Halloween movies and eating so much candy they got stomach aches. By the time all the trick or treaters had petered out, the only people left awake were Erin and Holtz, who had both shed their itchy wigs and we're cuddling on the biggest couch, and Patty who was laughing at some Halloween themed episode of a sitcom. 

"So...you got a wizard kink eh?"

"Holtz! 

"Sweet Jesus, I'm going home." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy halloween kids!!!


	21. We Wish You Merry Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> holtz and erin discover the true meaning of christmas (dads)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im sorry for being the worst at updating ever!! gonna try and do it more frequently since i got some traumatic ideas for these two still kicking around

 Erin stared out the kitchen window, swirling the spoon around in her coffee absentmindedly and listening to the slow ticking of the clock on the wall. Her quiet morning was interrupted by the sound of pounding footsteps that made their way down the steps and echoed across the firehouse.   
A blonde blur sped past the kitchen before backtracking and coming to a halt at the doorway. 

"Good morning, my love. Why are you up at this ungodly hour?" 

Holtzmann marched into the room and planted a kiss on Erin's cheek. "I should be asking you the same question."

"Touché," Erin set down her mug. "Do you want waffles? I was thinking of making--" 

"Lets go ice skating." Holtz spit out abruptly. 

Erin's eyebrows rose. "Yeah sure, sounds fun. Have you asked Patty and Abby to go?"

Holtz shook her head. "Just you and me." 

"Ok...everything alright?" 

"Dandy." 

Holtzmann turned on her heel and marched out the way she came, leaving Erin slightly disgruntled. 

"Waffles for one then." she sighed.

* * *

 

That evening, Erin sat in the passenger seat of the car, bundled up so tight she could barely move her arms. Holtz sat in the drivers seat, tapping her fingers along to the beat of a Christmas song playing softly out of the radio. Erin quickly noticed something and pointed it out to Holtz. "Rockefeller is the other direction."

"Huh?"

"The ice skating rick, at Rockefeller, it's the other way." 

"There's a skating rink at Rockefeller?" 

Erin blinked. 

Holtz waved her hand. "Whatever, we're not going there."

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

Towering buildings gave way to countryside as snow capped trees streaked by outside the window, and Erin had to remember that Jillian was her loving girlfriend and was definitely _not_ taking her out here to kill her....right?

They eventually pulled over on the side of the road, and Erin's anxiety spiked to new levels. 

"Holtz?"

"Yup hm."

"Where are we?"

"Ice skating."

Before Erin could ask anymore questions, Holtz was unfastening her seat belt and jumping out of the car. Erin had no choice but to follow. 

The sun was all but set, and Erin had an easier time following Jillian's tracks in the snow rather than her body moving in the dim light. They seemed to be in a heavily wooded area, but Holtz walked confidently towards the trees and nearly disappeared into them. 

"Holtz! Where are you taking me?" 

"Ice skating."

Erin heavy sighed, shivering against the bite of the wind. She shuffled after the other woman, and entered the dark coverage of the woods, making her breath cloud up in front of her even more. After nearly a minute of walking she was about to complain again, when suddenly the woods gave way to a large clearing. One half was probably a field of flowers in the summer, but was currently covered with a few inches of snow. The other half was a pond, completely frozen over and almost as big as any other skating rink.

Holtz gestured. "Ice skating." 

"We don't have any skates."

Holtzmann gestured to their boots. "That's what shoes are for."

"That ice could be thin."

"It's thicker than Kevin."

Holtz made her way to the edge of the pond and stepped one foot, and then the other, before carefully sliding along the edge. "See, perfectly safe!" Erin shook her head. "You're gonna die out there you know!" 

Jillian's smile could be seen brightly even in the dark. "You mean _we're_ going to die out here." 

"Oh no, I am not doing this." 

"Come oonnn, get in the Christmas spirit, Scrooge."

"Nothing about falling in a pond and dying of frostbite is festive!"

Holtzmann stepped off the ice and grabbed Erin's gloved hands with her own, pulling her in close. She pressed their foreheads together and stuck her bottom lip out in a pout."Pretty please with a faraday cage on top?" 

Erin tried to look anywhere but those watery blue eyes. "No!" 

Holtz moved Erin's scarf off the side of her neck and placed a lingering kiss there. "Are you sure?" 

Erin let out a shaky breath, watching it cloud in front of her. "Nope...I mean yes!" Erin was too busy thinking about the negative side effects of sex in the snow, to notice Holtz had been gradually edging her onto the pond.

"Jillian!" 

"Look, we're not dead." 

Erin nearly lost her footing, grabbing onto Holtz for support. "We're about to be!"

"Come on," she pried Erin's hands off her waist. "If we die you can blame me in the afterlife." 

Erin puffed out a breath of cold air and hesitantly moved her feet, gliding on the sheet of ice. "Ok, this isn't so bad." 

"Told ya."

"Shut up."

Holtzmann smirked, lifting Erin's gloved hand to press a kiss to the back of it. Erin ignored her heart trying to jump out of her chest. "So how did you know about this spot?" 

Jillian was silent for so long Erin thought she hadn't heard her. Just as she was about to impose the question again, she spoke. 

"I used to come here with Dad."

Erin nearly froze, but Holtz kept talking.

"He always wore the same bright red sweater," she shook her head. "we'd stay out here for hours--not that my mom noticed." Erin continued shuffling along the ice as quietly as possible, afraid if she moved too suddenly Holtzmann would spook like a wild horse and refuse to keep talking.

"I'd slip and fall all the time, and he'd be right there helping me up." she chuckled under her breath. "Not that he was much taller than me, mind you." 

Erin smiled. "He sounds nice."

"He was," Jillian's eyes scanned the horizon. "he used to run off in those trees, looking for wood. I was always afraid he'd never come back, but he'd jog out every time and drop a pile of sticks at my feet." she laughed again. "he gave the best hugs."

"Affectionate huh?" 

"Oh, like you wouldn't believe. I'd just be sitting around in my room, and he'd run and jump on my lap, he'd always-" she slapped her knee. "he'd always lick my nose with his little tongue." 

Erin stopped skating. "Sorry?" 

"I mean, it could be a little gross sometimes if he had just been digging in the trash, but I never minded." 

"Hang on, we are talking about your father here, right?" 

"No no no, my dog, Dad." 

Erin blinked. 

"You named your dog, Dad."

"Yes, you thought I was talking about my actual dad?" she laughed."like he would ever willingly hang out with me."

Erin was still trying to wrap her head around this. "A dog?

"Yes Erin, a sweet little basset hound, named Dad."

"Wow, um, ok." 

"He was my best friend, my only friend really."

Erin softened. "I can understand that." she squeezed her hand. They were silent for a moment, before Jillian skidded to a halt on the ice in front of Erin and grasped both her hands. "I uhm, I wanted to give you something--"her sentence was cut short as a cracking noise sounded from beneath Erin's shoe.

"YOU SAID WE WEREN'T GOING TO DIE!"

* * *

 

After nearly an hour car ride of Erin screaming about how they were going to have to amputate her foot, the two were finally snuggled up on the couch by the light of the small Christmas tree the team had put up in the corner. Erin was wearing at least five pairs of socks on one foot and had stuffed it into a blanket burrito.

"Your little piggy's doing ok? I'm sure I've got a pretty solid hacksaw upstairs that'll get the job done if not." 

Erin rolled her eyes. "They're nice and toasty now, thank you very much." 

"Good, I'd still love you with only one foot though, by the way."

Erin snuggled in closer to her side. "Good to know." 

"So...as I was saying before you--" 

"Almost died?"

"Yeah that," Erin huffed. "I wanted to give you an early Christmas gift."

Holtz reached across her to dig around in her coat pocket, eventually yanking something out. It was a small box, wrapped up in newspaper and tied off with some kind of copper wire. She presented it to Erin who took it cautiously. 

"This isn't going to explode when I open it right?"

"Possibly." 

Erin undid the wiring and tore off the newspaper to reveal a small velvet box. Her heart caught in her throat as she slowly lifted the lid to reveal a ring. The band was a braided rose gold and the center stone looked like a cross between opal and pearl. Each side of the stone sat smaller ones to match the center and they glinted under the tree lights.

"Don't worry! It's-"she coughed. "It's not an engagement ring." 

Erin's hands shook. "N-no, I know."

"It's um, it's a promise ring."

"Y-yeah I know."

Before Jillian could say anything else, Erin had set the ring next to her on the couch and kicked the blankets off her foot. She stood up suddenly then knelt down in front of the tree. The team had already put some gifts under it, and Erin dug to the back of the pile and pulled something out. A small present, wrapped in paper with little dancing Santa's on them. She walked back over to the couch and instead of sitting next to Jillian, she took a seat on her lap. "Open this."

Holtz raised an eyebrow but tore open the neatly wrapped paper. Inside was the same velvet box. Inside the box was a ring. Only this was more of a band, with small stones set entirely around the perimeter. She stared down at it blankly.

"Guess we had the same idea." 

Erin took the ring out of the box. "May I?" 

Jillian held out her right hand and let Erin slip the ring on. "Your turn." she grabbed the box next to them and repeated what Erin had done for her. They stared down at their hands for a moment before Erin tilted Jillian's head up to give her a lingering kiss. "I love you."

Holtz smiled against her lips. "I love you too."

* * *

 

  
Jillian didn't know what time it was--all she knew was it was Christmas morning and there was something wet on her face. _Wouldn't be the first time_ she thought. 

She tried to shift and that's when she noticed the weight on her chest. And the sound of something sniffing. Erin smelling her in her sleep? _Wouldn't be the first time._

She pried one eye open to find two more staring back at her. Nearly mistaking them for Erin's, she soon realized these eyes were brown and much more watery then her girlfriends. Finally relenting and opening her eyes all the way, she realized what was staring at her had fur. Soft tan fur and long droopy ears that brushed the tip of her nose. 

"Erin honey, you look positively gorgeous this morning."

"Hey!" a voice sounded from beside her.The tiny body on top of her trotted off and she sat up,blinking away the sunlight streaming in through the window. Finally getting a good look at what was in their bed, her heart stopped. 

A tiny basset hound puppy sat licking it's paw, with a bright red bow tied around it's neck. It looked up at her with the same droopy eyes Dad had, and did the smallest of barks. 

"Merry Christmas." 

Jillian tore her eyes away from the dog to look at Erin, who was sitting next to her in matching striped pajamas and red and green fluffy socks. She seemed to be waiting for Holtz's reaction with baited breath, but Jillian saved her from saying anything by tackling her down onto the bed and peppering her face with a million kisses. 

"Is that a positive reaction?" Erin said through her laughter.

At that moment the puppy let loose an adorably small bark and trotted over to them, joining Jillian by giving a wet slobbery kiss to Erin's cheek. "Ugh, thanks girl." 

Holtzmann climbed off Erin's lap and scooped the puppy into her arms. She lifted her to eye level and pressed their foreheads together. "You are. The most beautiful thing. I have ever seen." A lick on the nose affirmed that the puppy agreed. 

Holtz set her down and felt Erin reach over and swipe away a stray tear. She placed a kiss on her temple. "You get the naming honors." 

"Hmmm," Jillian stared down at the puppy, now hopping around the bed on four stubby legs.

"Cringle."

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> do yourself a favor and google image search basset hound puppy u will not be disappointed 
> 
> come scream @ me to update on my tumblr:safetylightsarefordudesss.tumblr.com


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